Flight Paths

The biggest clearance sales of the year start this week.  I clip coupons all the time, but clearance sales are good, too, and a clearance sale that I can use a coupon on makes my day.
            Where we live, I often resort to catalogues.  The shipping works out about the same as the gas it would cost to go to the store, and when you add in the time, there is no contest.  As you might guess, I am not one of those “Born to shop” women.  I only shop when I need something.  But when a clearance catalogue hits my mailbox, I usually try to think ahead to what I might need in the near future. 
            Of course you know the problem with clearance catalogues.  They only have some of the colors left, in only some of the sizes—usually the weird colors and odd sizes, say, chartreuse size 0 or fluorescent orange plaid size XXXL.  If you want the good stuff you have to call in early, preferably the same day you get the catalogue, and have several options on your list.  That way you might get one or two things you need in the correct size and a reasonably non-hideous color.
            If something is totally free, I am not quite as picky.  I had a coupon once for a free 12 pack of one of those odd new Dr Pepper flavors, if I also bought a regular 12 pack.  Keith is the Dr Pepper drinker in this house, but he doesn’t like his favorite things fooled around with—not his coffee, not his iced tea, not his Coke, and certainly not his Dr Pepper.  I almost did not use the coupon.  Then I thought, hey, it’s free!  If he doesn’t like it, I can give it to someone else.  We were nearly out of drinks and the regular Dr Pepper was on sale, so it was no loss to us if that is what happened.
            Isn’t it amazing how people line up for good sales, and go nuts for things that are free, but no one is lining up for the most important free thing there is—eternal life!  You can’t even tell anyone about this great deal without them looking at you askance and walking away in the middle of a sentence--or making a pronouncement like, “I don’t discuss religion and politics.”
            Unfortunately the majority of the world hasn’t a spiritual bone in its body.  People are all too consumed with the here and now, with immediate results, with instant gratification of any and every desire.  It’s interesting that Paul calls such people “babies” in his letter to the Corinthians.  It takes spiritual maturity, an ability to see beyond the present and to weigh the true importance of things, to understand that this world is not what counts.
            A baby will cover his face with a blanket and think no one can see him.  He has not yet learned that there is any other perspective than his own.  He thinks if he cannot see you, then you cannot see him.  That seems to be how many adults live their lives as well.  The only things that matter to them are what they are going through, and how it affects them.   The self-centeredness of an infant has grown into the selfishness of an adult. 
            So it is difficult for people to realize that they are sinners in need of salvation.  That is the first hurdle to cross.  You cannot convert a person who thinks he is spiritually safe.  That is why Jesus had more luck with harlots and publicans than with the religious leaders of his day.  And the sad thing is that if they could ever realize their need, the solution is free!  No coupons needed.  Yet they miss the greatest clearance sale ever.  Salvation has been on sale for thousands of years.  100% off, totally free.
            Don’t let pride and immaturity make you miss the bargain of your life.
 
So then as through one trespass the judgment came unto all men to condemnation, even so through one act of righteousness the free gift came unto all men to justification of life, Rom 5:18.
 
Dene Ward

Do young men still use that line?
            I remember as I reached my teenage years being warned about it.  It was standard in lessons on resisting the temptation of premarital sex.  Of course I was too young and naive to understand it all, but finally someone gave me an answer to that line that made sense:  "If you loved me, you wouldn't ask me to go against my principles." 
            After I got married I learned a far more valuable truth about it all.  It takes more love to live together day after day after day than it does to sleep together.  Young people, look at your parents or even your grandparents.  Think of all the storms they have weathered in their lives together.  Think of the sacrifices they have made, not only for you, but for each other as well.  That is love.  Sex is not love.  Sex is one type of glue to make that more meaningful love continue, but by itself it is nothing but two people using each other for a momentary thrill.  Does that sound like love?
            And as for you married folks who have become enamored by someone besides the person you made a commitment to in the presence of God, you ought to be wise enough to know this by now.  If you decide to break that spiritual contract and make a new commitment, guess what?  You will still see him sweaty and unshaven at times.  You will still see her in cold cream and rollers.  He will still belch out loud while scratching what will eventually become a pot belly, and she will still wear a ratty old housecoat and go around the house without makeup.  He or she won't really be any better than the one you have now.  In fact, since that person probably broke a commitment like you did, you won't even have the luxury of ultimate trust in your relationship.
            Love is about real life, and real life is about giving and sacrificing and enduring, not glamor and excitement and no, not endless sex.  The wise ones have learned to see beauty in the beaming wrinkles and the soft extra rolls around the middle and excitement in the smiling droopy jowls and calloused but gentle hands.  If you never learn those things, you are to be pitied, not celebrated.  But you won't need to worry about the lines handed to you by a seducer.  Where true love lives, there are no lines, just warmth and compassion and an assurance that person will always be there, no matter what.
 
And this second thing you do. You cover the LORD's altar with tears, with weeping and groaning because he no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the LORD was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the LORD, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the LORD of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless (Mal 2:13-16).
 
Dene Ward
 

350 years ago America had no holidays.  Go through your calendar and count them all.  Not one of those dates was a holiday back then.  In fact, in New England, celebrating Christmas was illegal.  Go read about Christmas in England that long ago and you will find out why.  It was considered a time to feast, drink, gamble, and fornicate, a holiday based more on Saturnalia than anything focused on family values.  When the Puritans left England, they left all that behind and declared Christmas a day of fasting. 
            By 1800 Christmas was no longer illegal, but it was just as rowdy, or more, as it had been in long ago England, sort of halfway between Spring Break and Mardi Gras, one authority I read said.  The poor, probably egged on by a criminal element, demanded entrance into the homes of those in better financial shape, along with money and food, often stooping so far as vandalism, looting, assault, and rape.  It was evidently like this all through the area.  On Christmas Day 1828, the rioting was so bad that the residents of New York City called for the formation of their first police force.  It wasn't until later in the nineteenth century that Christmas evolved into the family-focused holiday we know it as today.  In fact, it wasn't even declared a federal holiday until 1870. 
           We may think that earlier behavior is beyond us, but let me ask you, have you ever been to a Black Friday Sale?  "Between 2006 and 2018…44 Black Friday incidents in America left 11 dead and 109 injured" (nypost.com).  And sometimes we aren't much better in our own homes.
            I have only seen it once and hope to never again.  We were guests of others on Christmas Day and their method of passing out gifts went like this:  One person starting picking up presents, read the name, passed it to its recipient and continued, about one every five seconds.  In five minutes it was over with.  Everyone else was sitting there panting with exertion amid piles of crumpled wrapping paper and snarled up ribbon, and no one knew who got what from whom.  Meanwhile, my poor boys were still opening up what were far fewer, far less expensive presents, and looking up at the folks around them with a look of befuddlement.  "That's not how it's supposed to be," was clearly written on their faces.
            So how was it supposed to be?  We never had much money growing up, but my mother was still careful to teach us the point of gift-giving—it was to do kind things for others, not amass things for oneself.  She taught us to listen to one another all year long, to make note—sometimes literally—of things different ones of us needed or mentioned wanting, usually something that would make life a little easier.  None of us ever wished for the expensive and unattainable.  What was the point?  And then a couple of weeks before Christmas, the four of us went to the Mall, my sister and I with money carefully saved from our allowances and birthday gifts.  We divided up and I went with my father to buy for my mother and my sister, while she went with our mother to buy for me and our father.  Then we met in the middle of the concourse at a predetermined time and switched companions in order to finish our shopping.  We were usually so excited about what we had gotten each other it was difficult to keep the secret.
            Then on Christmas morning each one in turn got to choose a gift to give to another.  We all sat and watched that person open the gift.  The joy, the excitement, the pleasure on the other person's face was as much a part of the gift to us as the gift to the receiver.  We had very few gifts under that tree, but that gift giving process lasted far longer than our neighbors' who were soon out riding new bikes or scooters and hauling out boxes of trash while we were still sitting there enjoying the process of giving as well as receiving.
            I passed that on to my boys.  We were in the same boat as my parents in their early days—not much money and few gifts.  But they have both told me that choosing the gifts and watching their opening was always their favorite part of Christmas.  I still see that in them as mature adults, looking to give, looking to see to the needs of others, looking for ways to share what they have.  My mother did that for me and she has now done it for them, too, through me.  I think I see it in my grandchildren as well.
            Christmas does not have to be about materialism.  What it does have to be about is this:  It is more blessed to give than to receive, (Acts 20:35).  Don't let your Christmas morning be a feeding frenzy of piranha in the river "Gimme."  Make it a point to take time and savor your gifts to others.  My mother thought that was what it was all about, and that is a gift I truly treasure.
 
Dene Ward

My dogs brought me a present the other afternoon.  I walked out onto the carport and there by my chair, where I like to sit in the evening, lay a dead possum.  Not just any dead possum—this one they had buried for awhile so it would age properly, then dug up to lay before my “throne.”  I imagine that when the wind blew the right way, my neighbors knew about my present too.
            I have had cats bring me equally lovely gifts before, but this was a first for dogs.  As you can imagine, I did not jump for joy.  In fact, I hardly expressed any appreciation at all.  I had not felt very good that day—these medications do a number on my stomach, and this gift, no matter how sincerely it may have been meant, did not help.
            These two small creatures rely on me for everything.  I feed them, make sure they have their vaccinations and medications, care for them when they feel bad, and play with them when I have the chance.  And for that little bit they want nothing more in this world than to please me.  Red heelers are often called “Velcro dogs” because they stick next to their masters’ sides.  Magdi and Chloe will even turn their noses up at a treat just so I can pet them.  Loving is much more important to them than food. 
            And if for any reason I am displeased with them, their ears go down, their heads bow, their tails are tucked and they practically crawl on their knees to me.  Magdi will rub her head against my leg over and over.  I know she is saying, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry.”  If she isn’t, she certainly has me fooled.
            So how do I treat my Master?  Do I want nothing more in the world than to please Him?  Do I repent on my knees in abject sorrow when I know I don’t?  Or am I too proud for that?  Do I truly understand that any gift I give is really no more to Him than that dead possum was to me?  Do I appreciate that I can never repay what He has done for me, and therefore try my best to show gratitude and reverence with the gift of obedience and faith, a gift that still falls far short of repayment? 
            Sometimes I wonder if dogs show more respect for their masters than we do for ours, and their masters are anything but perfect, holy, and awesome.  Maybe we should take a lesson.
 
For we are all become as one who is unclean, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf, and our iniquities, like the wind, take us away…
Even so you also, when you have done all the things that are commanded you say, “We are unprofitable servants.  We have done that which it was our duty to do,” Isa 64:6; Luke 17:10.
 
Dene Ward

This time of year I usually try to make a batch of chocolate fudge.  I say “try” because I usually fail.  Peanut butter fudge I have down.  19 out of 20 times it will turn out right, but not the chocolate variety. I am talking about real fudge, not the newer recipes that add things like marshmallow crème, and wind up changing the texture just so it won’t flop on you.  If it shines, it isn’t fudge; if it’s soft, it isn’t fudge; if it’s grainy, it isn’t fudge; if it must be kept refrigerated, it isn’t fudge.  Real fudge is matte to the eye, firm to the touch, creamy in your mouth, and sits just fine on the countertop without changing consistency. 
            So a couple of years ago I found a recipe for foolproof fudge in a cooking magazine that I ordinarily trust implicitly.  I made their recipe, and indeed it did just fine, but it was shiny, it was soft, it had to be stored in the fridge.  It wasn’t fudge, and I was disappointed beyond measure.  However, in the article accompanying the recipe, the author stated that fudge is a tricky thing.  If the temperature and humidity are not just right, if your ingredients have sucked up too much moisture from the kitchen atmosphere any time recently, if your candy thermometer is just a degree or two off, your fudge will not “fudge.”  He went on to say that even seasoned professionals feel frustrated when trying to make this unreasonably difficult recipe.  While I am sorry those folks feel that way, it certainly made me feel a lot better.  It helped explain my 1 in 10 record of success over the years.
            Aren’t we glad salvation is not so difficult?  Just follow a few simple directions and suddenly you have a relationship that will help you in the trials of this life, and lead you to the joys of the next, the sweetest of treats anyone could possibly enjoy.  Why is it that some people feel so obligated to make it more difficult?
            My brother-in-law was nearly run out of a church on a rail once because, using the Philippian jailor of Acts 16 as an example, he dared to say that there really is not all that much we have to know before we submit to baptism.  Oh no, he was told, we must know all about the plan of God through the ages, about the true nature of the first century church, about the false teachings on salvation and how to combat them, about the “correct” definitions of faith, baptism, and grace, among other things.
            Just what was it Philip asked that Ethiopian proselyte when he wanted to be baptized?  If you believe with all your heart, you may, and he said, I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, Acts 8:37.  Funny that Philip never gave him a list of things to memorize and recite before he was allowed in the water.  Isn’t it wonderful—and amazing!—that our Lord will accept our obedient faith the moment we realize our need for Him?
            Yes, there are many things we must all learn.  All these years after my baptism there are still many more.  That’s what the rest of your life is for; that’s why Peter said to grow in the grace and knowledge of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, 2 Pet 3:18.   We never finish that part.  Maybe the problem is, we make this arbitrary list and think once we know it, we are finished.  Just who made the list in the first place, if God didn’t?
            One of Satan’s most powerful tools is frustration and hopelessness.  Let’s not help him do his work by making salvation so difficult that people give up before they even get the chance to start.
 
And [the jailor] called for lights and sprang in, and trembling for fear, fell down before Paul and Silas and brought them out and said, Sirs, what must I do to be saved?  And they said, Believe on the Lord Jesus and you shall be saved, you and your house; and they spoke the word of the Lord unto him with all that were in his house, and he took them the same hour of the night and washed their stripes and was baptized, he and all his immediately, Acts 16:29-33.
 
Dene Ward   

George C Parker was one of the most successful con men in American history.  He made his living by “selling” national landmarks in New York City to naïve tourists.  His favorite piece of “merchandise” was the Brooklyn Bridge, which he sold twice a week for years.  He took whatever he could get for it, depending upon the bankroll in the tourist’s pocket and the balance in his bank account, from as little as $75 to as much as $50,000.  More than once police had to tear down the toll booths built by the new, and completely unsuspecting, “owners.”
            Parker was arrested several times, but finally on December 17, 1928, he was incarcerated at Sing Sing for the final time.  He spent his last eight years there, one of the most popular inmates among both convicts and prison officials.  His legacy in popular culture is the phrase, “And if you believe that, I have a bridge I want to sell you.”  Other people’s gullibility made his living for him for a long time.
            Jesus warned his followers about being gullible.  Generosity may be a virtue.  Expressing confidence in the good intentions of others rather than assuming the worst may be a sign of the love described in 1 Corinthians 13.  Sometimes we will be “taken” when we offer compassion and that is as it should be.  “Turn the other cheek” may very well mean you get another slap.  But in other cases, Jesus reminds us to “be wise as serpents and harmless as doves.”  He tells us that he wishes his followers were as wise as the children of the world.  Does he give us any guidelines here?
            I am not the one to ask.  Many times I have been taken in, maybe too many times, so my record is not a good one.  But I can show you a couple of scriptures that might help.
            ​“Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not cast your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.” Matt 7:6.  Jesus meant for us to be discriminating in offering the gospel.  That does NOT mean you decide for yourself who will and will not listen.  What it means is to judge the reception and act accordingly.  By all means preach to everyone, but then why waste more time on those who scoff and scorn when there may well be others out there who are pining away at the chance to hear the good news? 
            He said the same to his apostles when he sent them out on what we call the Limited Commission.  And if anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town, Matt 10:14. Notice:  first they were given the opportunity, and when they refused the message they were left “in the dust.”
          Jesus did the same in his own work.  Look at John 6.  Early in that chapter Jesus feeds the 5000 with five loaves and two fish.  The next day they come seeking him again.  At least a few of them see Jesus as a meal ticket and he confronts them.  “You seek me not because you saw signs but because you ate your fill of the loaves,” (6:26).  Still later, as his discourse becomes plainer and he requires more commitment from them than they are willing to give, many leave.  Did Jesus chase after them?  No.  He looked at his disciples and asked them, “Are you going to leave, too?” (6:66,67).
            Is this easy?  Knowing when the time has come to cut things off is never easy.  It may be that it takes some people years of teaching before they get it, and you find yourself saying, “What if I hadn’t kept on trying?”  But then what if you waste your time on someone who has made it plain he is not interested and you never get to the one who is? 
            Maybe Jesus is saying, “Just pay attention.  Don’t ignore the one who is ripe for the picking while you waste time on the other who has already dried on the vine.”
            Sometimes you have to make difficult choices.  Jesus is telling you, it's okay.  He is telling you that he expects you to be wise and do your best.  Sow the seed, give out of your pocket, but do not be taken in like a babe in the woods when the signs are obvious.  When people show up asking for money, telling you they are Christians from another city, ask them who they worship with.  See if they know the names they ought to.  It isn’t a lack of compassion to check out their story. 
            And then if you need to say no, say it.  If you need to shake the dust off your feet, do it.  Just don’t buy the Brooklyn Bridge if you can help it.
 
Conduct yourselves with wisdom toward outsiders, making the most of the opportunities. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you should answer everyone. Col 4:5-6
 
Dene Ward

Due to Keith's profound deafness, we have had more than the usual interest in cochlear implants.  The first one was invented by Andre Djourno and Charles Eyries in 1957.  William House also invented one in 1961.  That one was first implanted at Stanford University in 1964.  But these early implants were of limited use.  They could not stimulate different areas of the ear at different times to allow for different frequencies.  Research continued.  The resulting modern multi-channel cochlear implant, which fixed the multiple frequency issues, was first implanted on December 16, 1977, in Vienna by Professor Kurt Burein.  As of 2012, the FDA states that over 324,200 patients have received them. 
          The advantages claimed are improved (though not perfectly normal) hearing, decrease in depression, anxiety and social isolation, and improved verbal communication.  While that sounds great, these things are not for everyone.  Anyone whose deafness is caused by injury to or absence of the auditory nerve cannot be helped.  In addition, it limits things like MRIs on the implant patient's head, which can only be done under very strict guidelines.  And then there is the issue of cost, since not all insurance companies will cover the bill, or will cover only a part of it, leaving a hefty portion for the patient.  Since Keith has already had neurological issues which have required MRIs, it would seem the implant is not for him even if no other problems existed.
          While we might wish things were different for us, did you realize that not everyone wants one of these miracle inventions?  Some of those in the deaf culture consider these things oppression by the hearing world, a form of discrimination, and assault on their personhood.  They are certainly entitled to their own feelings, and I would not for a minute try to tell any one of them what to do and how to live their lives.  None of us should.  But there is another issue—spiritual deafness, people who refuse to listen to God.  Now that needs to be fixed.
           I was thinking about all these things one day last spring as Chloe and I walked out to Magdi’s grave for a few minutes.  The mums we planted there were coming back from the winter’s frost, and the grass around it greening up as well.  As we headed back to the house, I stopped and listened.  I heard crows, wrens, titmice, cardinals, hawks, woodpeckers, chickadees, blue jays, and sparrows, as well as a few I haven’t yet learned to recognize.  The world seemed completely full of tweets, chirps, whistles, warbles, and trills.  These are the things that my poor husband cannot hear, which is even worse than just being deaf, because I consider them another way to hear God, just as surely as if He had spoken out loud.  Who else could have created such diverse and beautiful sounds?  Everything else was manmade and ugly—a semi roaring out on the highway, the neighbor’s leaf blower whining away, another’s raucous lawn mower spitting and sputtering, and still another’s old pickup truck loudly revving.  Now a few of those Keith can actually hear!  Poor guy.
            Then I stopped to think of all the other times I have heard God in my life—the incessant pounding of the waves on the beach; the scream of a hawk diving for its prey; the sound of a little boy’s voice who, less than thirteen years ago, did not exist; my mother’s final breath as she left for a better place.  Anyone who has not heard God in those things, probably does not hear Him in the place where He speaks plainest—His word, for God does not leave His children wondering just exactly what that metaphysical moment they experienced meant for them to do.  He tells them plainly.
            Remember the Day of Pentecost?  Everyone heard “a sound as of a rushing mighty wind” that “filled all the house,” a sound they all recognized as having come “from heaven,” Acts 2:2.  Yet when did they finally know what God wanted them to do?  Only after the apostles spoke.  “Then when they heard this,” they were told exactly what to do, 2:37. 
            When an angel spoke to Cornelius in a vision—an angel, mind you—he certainly heard God, but he was told to send for Peter who would speak “words whereby you shall be saved” 11:14.
            Paul told the Romans “faith comes by hearing and hearing through the word of Christ” 10:17, the same word, the same gospel he proclaimed “the power of God unto salvation” 1:16.
            Yes, it is possible to hear God in the world around you.  If you don’t, you have a remarkably unspiritual mind.  If the roar of the wind and crack of thunder in a storm doesn’t fill you with wonder at the power of an Almighty Creator, you need a few pointed reminders as to the brevity and fragility of life and the temporal nature of the world around you.  But if you really want to know what God wants of you, get out His Word and read it.  Only those who are ready to listen can really hear, and you don't need any sort of implant to do so.
 
Whoever is of God hears the words of God. The reason why you do not hear them is that you are not of God. John 8:47.
 
Dene Ward
 

The last of a series by our guest writer, Lucas Ward.

2 Pet. 1:5-7  "Yea, and for this very cause adding on your part all diligence, in your faith supply virtue; and in your virtue knowledge; and in your knowledge self-control; and in your self-control patience; and in your patience godliness; and in your godliness brotherly kindness; and in your brotherly kindness love."
 
            In most of our discussions of love of the brethren, we've been discussing love as defined by the Greek word agape.  This is the word defined in 1 Cor. 13:4-7 and is the most common word for love in the New Testament, but clearly Peter has something else in mind as he differentiates between love and brotherly kindness.  The word used here for brotherly kindness is philadelphia (which helps explain why the city in Pennsylvannia is referred to as "The City of Brotherly Love").  See, in Greek there are four different words for what we think of as love.  Eros is physical love and passion.  Storge is the natural, almost chemical love parents have for children.  The first time you held your child and were overwhelmed with the need to protect her you were feeling storge.  This word is rarely used in the NT, primarily as a condemnation against those who didn't feel it.  Rom. 1:31 "without natural affection".  Then agape is the love of action.  There is very little emotion attached, rather this is love shown by doing what is best for the one loved.  It is the love we can show close friends and dire enemies.  The fourth love is phileo, a tense of which is used in Peter to become philadelphia.  This is family love.  There is some emotion involved, some affection, but there is also a strong sense of duty or obligation.  After all, brothers fight like cats and dogs sometimes but when one brother sees the other being bullied we suddenly hear, "Hey!  I'm the only one allowed to pick on him!" and the erstwhile adversarial brother is suddenly allied with the tormented one to face the world together.  That is philadelphia.  It is the idea that blood is thicker than water.  It is the concept of dropping everything else and running to help because that is what family does even if I sometimes get so angry at them.  
            There are two points that I want to make from Peter's use of brotherly kindness.  The first is that it emphasizes the family bond.  We don't just agape each other, we philadelphia.  While we are told clearly that we cannot allow our earthly families to come between us and Christ, that Christ must always come first (Matt. 10:37, 19:29), here is our true spiritual family.  This is family as it should be.  I am aware that I have been very lucky with my family.  My father was not only present, which would have automatically made him better than about half of fathers, but he actively tried to be the best father he could.  I know that not everyone is so lucky which is why the church as the family of God should be so inviting.  Again, family as it should be.  A family where we truly love each other.  After all, if earthly blood is thicker than water how much thicker still is spiritual blood?  This means, of course, that all those feelings of duty and obligation we normally feel towards our families we ought to be feeling towards our brethren in Christ.  If there is need, we drop everything and run to help, because we're family.  If others are attacking, we jump in to defend, because the only one allowed to pick on my spiritual brother is me!  Brotherly kindness demands that our spiritual families are now our priority. 
            The other point to make about how Peter uses brotherly kindness in this passage is that he shows that we can grow in our love for each other, whether agape or philadelphia.  Peter says we are to "give diligence" to grow in all of these areas.  He later says that if these "are yours and abound" we will not be unfruitful.  Diligence is the concept of earnest, continuing effort.  To abound means to fill to the overflowing.  We can improve, in fact, one of the most dangerous things a Christian can say is, "that's just how I am".  No, it's not.  We can grow.  The inspired Apostle Peter said so.  And no matter how good we are at something there is still room for improvement.  In 1 Thess. 4:9-10 Paul tells the church there that they are excellent at brotherly love. He holds them up as an example of how to do it right to other churches.  After this praise Paul then urges them to continue growing in that area.  'You are the best at this that there is, keep on getting even better'.  Rom. 12:10, often translated "in honor preferring one another" is translated in the English Standard Version as "outdo one another in showing love".  If that latter translation is the most correct one it means that while love does not envy, vaunt itself or seek its own, there is one area in Christianity where there is room for friendly competition:  love.  I can almost hear the trash talk:  "Hey, Bob, I'm going to show you up in love for the brethren"; "Keep dreaming, pal, everyone knows I'm the best at brotherly love in this church!" 
            No matter how good or bad we are at brotherly love at the beginning of our walk with God we can continue to grow in those areas.  As we grow in our faith, meekness, humility, godliness and righteousness our love for our brethren will continue to improve as well.  We will recognize God's love not only for us but them as well.  We will recognize our own failures and make allowances for others.  Our patience and long-suffering will grow the more we recognize our own struggles, which will lead to better love of the brethren.  The closer we come to Christ, the closer we will feel to His family and the more we will make them a priority.  After all, His blood is thicker than water.
 
1 Thess. 4:9-10  "Now concerning brotherly love you have no need for anyone to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love one another, for that indeed is what you are doing to all the brothers throughout Macedonia. But we urge you, brothers, to do this more and more"
 
Lucas Ward

I finally did it a few years ago:  I went to Amazon and began a wish list.  There isn’t much on it because I have very few wishes—at least ones that a human can do anything about.  And for most of our married life we have lived so closely that wishes for earthly things just made me discontent and unhappy so I avoided making them.  But every time I ordered something we needed from Amazon, there was that wish list icon in the top corner, so I gave in and made one.  I had to browse to come up with more than 2 things to put on it. I haven’t touched it since—and neither has anyone else.  In fact, I have completely forgotten what I put on it.  Must not have been too important, huh?
            I hear that some people have spiritual wish lists too.  Usually I find out when they come up to me and say, “I wish I had as much Bible knowledge as you do.”
            Let me set the record straight first.  I don’t have a passel of Bible knowledge in my hip pocket.  I have to look things up just like you do.  And, the knowledge I do have is courtesy of a husband whose knowledge is nearly encyclopedic and whose willingness to help is overflowing.  He is, in fact, the one who taught me how to study, so you could say that he is responsible for all of my so-called knowledge, both the answers he has given me and the things I have learned on my own.
            But about that knowledge you wish you had—why don’t you just do what I did and fulfill your own wish?  No one can do it for you anyway.  All it takes is time.  By that I mean hours at a time over a succession of years.  Do you really think I learned what I know in 2 weeks?  I have been working on this so long I have even had to unlearn a few things, because that’s the next step—growing in your knowledge as you hone your understanding of what you have learned.  It isn’t just a list of facts; it’s a compilation of concepts that weaves itself into a complex tapestry, and the more you learn the more clearly you will comprehend it.
            Don’t talk to me about “not having enough time.”  Nearly every one of us has changed our schedules to add something that was important to us.  You added children to your life.  That really changed your schedule.  You went back to school.  You started exercising.  You took on a new job.  When it mattered to you, you found the time.        
            I have learned this about wish lists—don’t put anything on them that you really need.  You may never get it when you are depending upon someone else.  Instead, buy yourself the present.  Buy this one—knowledge--with the same time and energy you spend on things that are not nearly as important. 
 
​Buy truth, and do not sell it; buy wisdom, instruction, and understanding. Prov 23:23
My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge…Hos 4:6.
 
Dene Ward

For probably the first ten years of my life we had a holiday ritual.  We spent every Christmas Eve with my daddy's parents and we had Christmas Dinner at my maternal grandmother's house with all her children, their spouses, and grandchildren.  Altogether there were about 20 of us in a small frame house, which might have been 800 square feet at most.  I still remember my grandmother's cornbread dressing which, despite her giving me her "recipe" of "this and that and a little more of the other if that looks like this," I have never been able to duplicate.  Like my mother I finally came up with my own and have stuck with it.  Then there was her banana pudding—vanilla wafers, very ripe bananas, a real egg custard, and meringue on top, usually still warm.
            The adults at this huge feast of a meal always sat in the dining room.  The babies still in high chairs sat next to the parents at the dining table.  The rest of us kids stood by as our mothers fixed us a plate and then set us up at "The Kids' Table," a small table in the kitchen.  Seems like we seldom talked much, and we certainly didn't play around much—both the table and the kitchen were too small for rambunctiousness if we wanted to stay out of trouble.  We usually sat there and listened to the grown-ups talking and laughing in the next room as we ate.  Sometimes we watched the backyard through the screen door right by the table, and always a cool December breeze blew in and chilled us and our food a little too quickly.  But a kitchen in Central Florida, even in December, needed an open door or a tiny house with twenty people in it would have been far too warm.  Some of the kids actually got up as soon as they could to go sit on the front porch and swing or play on the gray-painted planks, missing dessert entirely, but I have never skipped dessert in my life, if it was available.
            We moved away when I was nine and after a couple of years traveling the long road back from Tampa to Orlando, we began keeping our own holiday traditions and meal at our house.  Once in a while we returned for some special year, like the year Keith was introduced to the family.  By then, the kids' table had added the front porch as its adjunct for the teenagers.  Not many were still small enough for that tiny kitchen, and we could all fill our own plates.  We were responsible for what we ate, how much, and when.
            If you called the church a holiday celebration, who would be sitting in the dining room and who would be sitting at the Kids' Table?  Paul seemed to think the Corinthians might be in the kitchen or perhaps in the high chairs with the babies.  But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it. And even now you are not yet ready (1Cor 3:1-2).  If you keep reading, their problems were jealousy, strife, and divisions which manifested themselves in a host of ways, as the remainder of the book shows. 
            But that isn't the only way we act like children.  …So that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes (Eph 4:14).  Once again if you read the surrounding verses you find issues with unity and love as well as their lack of a foundation in the Word, which is why those gifts were given—apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors, and teachers to provide them that foundation.
            And of course, the classic passage:  For when by reason of the time ye ought to be teachers, you have need again that someone teach you the rudiments of the first principles of the oracles of God; and are become such as have need of milk, and not of solid food. For every one that partakes of milk is without experience of the word of righteousness; for he is a baby (Heb 5:12-13).
            If I wanted to make just one application from these passages and the metaphor I began with, it might be this:  The children had to have their plates dipped out by their mothers.  They not only couldn't reach across the big dining table, they did not know how to put a balanced meal on their plates.  I remember thinking that Nannie's dressing and banana pudding would make one fine meal, thank you very much, but for some reason I also ended up with green beans and collard greens, too.  How are we doing at dishing up our spiritual plates?  Do we only eat what the elders' choose to dish out in the Bible classes of our assembly, picking at it like it was collard greens, or do we study on our own, making the time to dig deeply into the Word as if it really meant something to us?  Do we ever attend the extra studies offered, or even go to a more-studied brother and ask to study with him?  Do we have to be force-fed the Bread of Life?
           We kids always felt a little resentment at being at the Kids' Table, waiting very impatiently until we were grown-up enough to move to the porch at least, if not the dining table.  How about us?  Are we ready to grow up and move on, or are we perfectly happy being spoon-fed?
 
But solid food is for fullgrown men, even those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern good and evil (Heb 5:14).
 
Dene Ward