One spring morning a couple of years ago I sat on the carport snapping beans.  The humidity was still low, the bugs were few, and a cool breeze ruffled my curls and made the morning comfortable.  The minute I set myself up in a lawn chair, a blue plastic five gallon bucket at the ready for tips and tails, and a pink hospital tub full of early pole beans in my lap, the dogs came running, looking for a handout.

    “These are green beans,” I told them, “not treats.”  Yet they sat watching me expectantly, one dog parked next to either knee, ears at attention, tails swishing sparkly grains of sand across the rough concrete.  Occasionally Magdi’s big brown eyes strayed from my face to my hands and she licked her chops.

    “Okay,” I told her, “but you’ll be sorry,” and I handed her a long, flat, raw bean.  I could hardly believe it as she crunched away, swallowed and begged for another.  So I rifled through the tub and found one too big and tough for human consumption.  Down the hatch it went.

    Chloe, who was then just over a year old, bumped my knee with her nose.  “Me too,” her equally big brown eyes said, so I gave her a bean.  Instantly she spat it out.  “Yuk!” was written all over her furry face.

    “Told ya,” I smugly commented.

    Yet Magdi continued to down the culls as I found them, relishing every bite.  Chloe watched Magdi, then looked at the bean she had rejected.  She sniffed it and her ears drooped a bit.  She looked at Magdi again, who was happily chomping a bug-bitten throwaway.  Chloe looked at her bean and licked it.  She looked at Magdi again, then gingerly picked up her own bean and began to chew.  She managed to choke the thing down, then sat up and looked at me with that familiar expectant gaze.

    “You’re kidding,” I said to her, but handed her another bean.  This one went down more easily.  Luckily I had a large supply of fresh-picked beans and Keith had not been too careful in his picking so I had plenty of bad ones to share.  By the time I finished Magdi had long since had her fill, but Chloe was scouring the carport like a fuzzy, red-headed vacuum cleaner, scarfing up even the tips and tails that had missed the trash bucket.

    Chloe was no longer a puppy, but she was still learning from her older mentor.  The simple “peer pressure” of seeing someone she respected eating something she didn’t even like influenced her to do the same thing.

    It’s time to look around and see whom you might be influencing.  Just because there are no toddlers in the house doesn’t mean you don’t need to be careful.  Whatever your age, there is someone younger watching how you handle the universal experiences of life so they will know what to do when their turn comes.

    And to the other side of the equation—why do you do the things you do?  Are you as strong as you think you are when the world presses you to act in certain ways?  Are you doing things you don’t even enjoy just to fit in?  Stop watching how others react.  Stop making decisions based on something besides right and wrong.  If you don’t, you may find yourself licking a rough concrete slab, eating a pile of tough, bug-bitten green beans just because everyone else is doing it.

Be careful to observe all these words that I command you, that it may go well with you and with your children after you forever when you do what is good and right in the sight of the Lord your God.  When the Lord your God cuts off before you the nations whom you go in to dispossess, and you dispossess them and dwell in their land, take care that you be not ensnared to follow after them, after they have been destroyed before you, and that you do not inquire about their gods, saying, ‘How did these nations serve their gods?—that I may also do the same.’ You shall not worship your God in that way…Everything that I command you, you shall be careful to do.  You shall not add to it nor take from it, Deut 12:28-32.

Dene Ward

“What do you think about the role of women in the church?”

    The subject is a minefield.  No one seems to be able to keep their own prejudices and sore spots out of it.  Women are quick to point out the failings of men as if that undoes the dictates of God.  Men are quick to pontificate about the worst of women, even straying into women in the work force and the evils of abortion as if that had anything to do with the issue.  Not a few pat themselves on the back about how well they treat women and why would any woman want anything more than their wonderful selves?  (Am I not better to thee than seven sons? Elkanah asked Hannah.)  Everyone wants to add the “what ifs” and invent artificial boundaries that the scriptures never speak of.  And we think the Pharisees were ridiculous with their traditions.  

    But I am asked—often.  So here is, not what I think, but what it seems obvious that the Bible says.

    Do women have a leadership role as Christians?  Yes.  “Children obey your
parents” Eph 6:1, obviously includes mothers who, last I checked, were all women .  

The older women are to “train the younger,” Titus 2:4.  When I teach my Bible classes, I have control of the students.  I am the one who directs the discussion and sets its boundaries in time and content.  I am the one responsible for correction if error is spoken.   Sounds like leadership to me.

Women are to “rule the household” 1 Tim 5:14.  A lot of men completely miss that one.  It means she has a domain and he has no business micromanaging her in it unless she is doing a poor job of stewarding his provision for the family.

     On the other hand, whenever the church is talked about as an assembled group, things are much different.  Women are specifically told to “learn quietly with all submissiveness” 1 Tim 2:11.  As to the command in 1 Cor 14 that women are to “be silent,” we need to recognize the context and pull out every other time that two word phrase is used in that same context before we make blanket statements about women not opening their mouths until the “amen” has been said.  But that does not undo 1 Timothy 2 in any way.

    I could go on about Paul’s statement that a woman is not “to teach nor have dominion over a man.”  I could talk about parsing the sentence.  I could just bypass that and go to the obvious point that the preposition “over” has to go with both “teach” and “have dominion” or else the Bible contradicts itself.  Priscilla obviously helped teach Apollos and if all teaching is forbidden to women then that includes teaching children and women (which we have already seen is commanded) and singing (“teaching and admonishing yourselves in songs…”—the Greek word is the same in both passages) and you know what?  Everyone would have to completely ignore all godly women because their example teaches even if they never open their mouths.  But don’t you see?  There is something much more basic going on when we take issue with the scriptures.

    Whenever I hear women trying to sidestep 1 Tim 2:11, when I hear them rationalizing about their talents and how God wouldn’t want them wasted, when I hear them talking about Paul as if he were not an inspired apostle, when I hear them listing the failings of the men in their group (as if they had none) and dreaming up everything they can possibly think of that might make an exception, I think of Psalm 119:97:  Oh how I love your law, it is my meditation all the day.  When I try to weasel my way out of God’s commands, when I try to avoid them in any way possible, what does that say about how I feel about them?  Doesn’t much sound like love to me.

    God is my Lord, not the other way around.  He has told us exactly how He wants things to be done.  I have no business telling Him that my way is better or that He ought to accept my way because I did it with a good heart.  I have no business railing against Him about why He gave me a certain talent if He won’t let me use it the way I want to use it.  I remember a few men in the Old Testament who learned that lesson the hard way.   Ladies, God will treat you equally.  Isn’t that what you want?  Or is it?

    If I love the law of God, if He is my Lord, I will not try to worm my way out of His commands, no matter how many men or Pharisaical Christians abuse them.  THAT is how I feel about the issue.

I am your servant; give me understanding, that I may know your testimonies! It is time for the LORD to act, for your law has been broken. Therefore I love your commandments above gold, above fine gold. Therefore I consider all your precepts to be right; I hate every false way.  Ps 119:125-128

Dene Ward

I saw a bumper sticker in a parking lot:  DON’T TELL ME WHAT KIND OF DAY TO HAVE.  I must be slow because it took me several minutes to figure it out.  Here was someone so mad at the world that he couldn’t even handle a common courtesy.  He obviously did not want to have a nice day, thank you very much, and I suspect that he didn’t, not that day nor any other.
 
   I have heard similar things about other polite phrases.  “You don’t care how I am, why ask?”  Everyone with any sense knows that “How are you?” is not a question; it’s a greeting.  Do these people need a course in semantics or what?

    No, what they need is an attitude adjustment, the kind you get from becoming a disciple of Christ.  Christians are not afraid to take risks, to put themselves out there for people like that to step all over, because Christians understand that treating others well, regardless of how they are treated, is the signature of a follower of Christ.  More than anything else, it shows who we are.  We choose to believe the best about people; we choose to offer help whether it is accepted or not, whether we are taken advantage of or not; we choose to show a spirit of forgiveness whether the other person deserves it or not.

    Those others, the grumpy, the bitter, the cynical, the ones who view the world with a jaundiced eye, the ones who deride us for our stupidity, as they categorize it, who think themselves so much smarter and better than us with their snide sarcastic sayings—“Don’t tell me what kind of day to have”--are in actuality cowards.  They are afraid of being hurt, afraid of being used, afraid of losing the only thing they have—confidence in themselves and how they choose to live.  They will not take risks, while we thrive on it.  We know that anything we lose here was not worth that much anyway—it will all perish in the end.  The things they count on could be gone in a flash, but they are not smart enough to figure that out.

    So there you have it—they are cowards and not very smart ones at that. Don’t worry when they laugh at you for your willingness to take risks.  When you think about it, we aren’t taking any risks at all—they are the ones with everything to lose.

    And by the way, have a nice day!

You have heard that it was said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth: but I say unto you, resist not him that is evil: but whosoever smites you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if any man would go to law with you, and take away your coat, let him have your cloak also.  And whosoever shall compel you to go one mile, go with him two.  Give to him that asks you, and from him that would borrow of you turn not away. You have heard that it was said, You shall love your neighbor, and hate your enemy: but I say unto you, love your enemies, and pray for them that persecute you; that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven: for he makes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the just and the unjust. For if you love them that love you, what reward have you? Do not even the publicans the same? And if you salute your brethren only, what do you more than others? Do not even the Gentiles the same? You therefore shall be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect. Matt 5:38-48.

Dene Ward

We just finished helping my mother move up here near us, probably the last move she will ever make.  She has accumulated a lot in 87 years.  Even though she gave away at least half of her kitchen equipment and several pieces of furniture, as the movers traipsed in and out and the little house begin to fill, we no longer said, “In the living room,” or “In the back bedroom.”  By the end we were telling them, “Just find an empty corner and put it there.”  True, the house is 100 square feet less than the one she left, but that’s only a 10 x 10 room, perhaps one very small bedroom, and there seems to be many more times that much furniture we have yet to find a place for.  It appears that she will need to give away even more.

    I found myself thinking what I might give up when we need to leave this place we have lived for 33 years now.  Relatively small as family homes go, just 1350 square feet, we still managed to raise two boys to manhood and have accumulated far more than will fit in a house the size of my mother’s new one.  So what can I do without?

    The answer is really simple.  You can do without practically every possession you have.  Just look at what we take camping.  It’s a lot to take for a vacation, but for living, it’s practically nothing and we manage just fine for well over a week.  

    But maybe the answer is even easier than that.  What will you take in the moving van when you die?  Absolutely nothing.  It will be empty from front to rear, top to bottom.  Absolute essentials for this physical life may be the smallest and plainest amounts of food, clothing, and shelter, but for your spiritual life, all those things that you spend so much time picking out, caring for, and working to pay for are completely nonessential  

    So why do we spend so much time and energy on them?  Why do we care so much where we live and how it is decorated, what we wear and who designed it, what we eat and how good it tastes?  Could it be because we have forgotten this fundamental truth:  things of this life—possessions, status, wealth, connections—none of it matters to the wise child of God.  

Do they matter to you?  If you could not give them up, they matter more than you probably want to admit.  And if losing them would turn you into an emotional wreck, your priorities need a serious overhaul.

Today, think about that moving van on the day of your death.  It doesn’t really matter what you might like to put in it.  Your soul is going somewhere, but it won’t move an inch.

Be not afraid when a man becomes rich, when the glory of his house increases. For when he dies he will carry nothing away; his glory will not go down after him, Ps 49:16-17.

Dene Ward