I began by keeping three or four potted herbs on my steps for several years. That gradually evolved into a separate, full-blown herb garden—two kinds of parsley, three kinds of basil, plus thyme, oregano, marjoram, dill, sage, cilantro, rosemary, fennel, mint, and chives. 
            I’m still learning some things the hard way.  Dill must be planted in the fall because it cannot tolerate the heat of a Florida summer.  Basil will stop growing when the weather cools, whether you protect it from the frost or not.  Oregano is a ground runner and needs a lot of room.  You must snip your chives from the bottom—not just trim off the tops—if you expect them to replenish.  One recipe for pesto will decimate a basil plant for at least two weeks.  Always give mint its own separate bed, or better still, pot, because it will take over the joint if you don’t. 
            And, Keith hates cilantro.  Although I am not exactly sure how he knows this, he says it tastes “like stinkbugs.”  We discovered this when I sprinkled chopped fresh cilantro over a turkey tortilla casserole.  Now cilantro does have a distinctive flavor.  While it bears a close physical resemblance to Italian flat-leaf parsley, the strongest flavored parsley, its flavor is probably ten times stronger than that herb. There IS such a thing as too much cilantro.  On the other hand, a lot of people like it in moderation, including me.  I guess there is no accounting for tastes.
            And that is why some people reject Jesus.  To some people life tastes sweeter when we do things His way.  The difficult times become easier to bear, and the good times more than we dared hope for.  But other people see in Him a restrictive cage denying them all the pleasures of life.  Their focus on the here and now keeps them from seeing the victory of Eternity, but even worse, they are blinded by Satan to the true joys a child of God can have in this life as well.  …And exercise yourself unto godliness; for bodily exercise is profitable for a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having the promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come. 1 Tim 4:7,8.  We can have joy, peace, hope, love, and fellowship with both God and the best people on earth, while on this earth. 
            But they just can’t see it.  I guess to them, godliness tastes like stinkbugs.  Truly, there is just no accounting for tastes.
 
For we are a sweet smell of Christ unto God, in them that are saved, and in them that perish; to the one a smell from death unto death, and to the other a smell from life unto life…2 Cor 2:15,16
 
Dene Ward

Today's post is by guest writer Lucas Ward.

I do not have any children so you may think I don’t have anything worth listening to.  The thing is, for 7 years I was in the position of managing some of Mama's little darlings in what was, for many of them, their first job.  So I saw up close and personal the results of modern American child rearing.  It was rarely pretty.  
            Most kids, as they first get out into the world, have no sense of cause and effect. They have no idea that they should ever put the group ahead of themselves. They don't know how to deal with adversity because they've never been allowed to experience it before. They don't know what work is, have no sense of responsibility, and don't acknowledge any absolutes. AND THESE ARE THE GOOD KIDS!
            Good parents should raise their children to succeed in life, and if they cannot hold down a job, they won’t.  Period.  So here are some suggestions from the boss they might work for someday, who is probably a lot like most bosses.
            1) Don't protect your kids from their mistakes.  If they goof up, allow them to feel the pain it causes.  Point out the relationship between their actions and the consequences.  When it’s their fault, they need to own it, not blame someone else.
            2) Don't protect your kids from life.  I once was talking to one of my employees and said, "Life isn't fair."  She looked at me strangely and said, "Yes it is, or it always has been to me."  All I could do was stare at her with my mouth hanging open and think "Oh, you poor girl!"  She had no defenses built up.  When something unfair happens to her, which it will, she will have no idea how to handle it.  She'll likely fall apart.  Inoculate your children against life by letting them see what goes on and showing them how to handle it.
            3) Teach your children that they aren't the most important thing in the world.  (I know, they are the most important thing to you, but if you aren't careful you'll teach them to act as if they are the world's royalty.)  When I was growing up I didn't always get what I wanted, not always because it was a bad thing or because my parents couldn't afford it, but because it was my brother's turn to choose or Dad or Mom wanted to do something different.  We were also taught to consider how our actions affected others. There was no quicker way to anger Dad than to be noisy when Mom was napping. We were taught to think of others.
            4) Teach your children what work is.  If you live in town, this may be harder – no, I don't consider taking the trash out twice a week and mowing a quarter acre lawn on a riding mower to be work -- but figure something out.  I had good kids as employees who wanted to be good employees, but just didn't know how to work: how to stick with a job, how to see what needed to be done and do it, how to stay busy.  There's an old phrase that really needs to be reintroduced to America's youth: "An honest day's work for an honest day's pay".  Most kids today think that clocking in on time, working while the boss is watching, and talking to their friends the rest of the time is "work".  The company isn't paying them to stand around, and one day they may find out the hard way.
            5) While there are some gray areas, some things are right and some are wrong.  Even modern psychology tells us that children are happier with boundaries—it makes them feel secure.  The same fence that keeps them in, keeps the bad things out.  So teach them some absolute guidelines. Best place to start: your Bible.
            Wow, I've become a cranky old man.                                            
                                                                                                           
Lucas Ward

Possums, or more properly “opossums,” can be a nuisance.  They rummage in the garbage, they poke about in the shed, and they ramble into the garden destroying perfectly good melons with a bite or two out of each one.  That is one reason we have dogs, and Magdi, our first Australian cattle dog, did better than any other at solving the problem  For awhile we had to bury one every day; she must have come across some sort of Possumopolis out in the woods.
            One morning Keith found yet another as he was leaving for work, but he was so late he had no time to properly dispose of it.  It was my turn to do the honors.  I have come a long way in 32 years of country life, but I still won’t pick up a dead thing, even with big thick gloves.  So I got the shovel.
            I am glad my neighbors are not close.  I stuck the shovel edge down by the possum and pushed, assuming it would just slide under the offensive creature so I could carry it out to the woods and let nature do the disposal work.  Instead, the shovel just pushed the possum along.  I tried again, and again, and again.   Every time I pushed, the possum moved farther and I wound up following it in a circle around the field.  This possum might as well have been alive it was making such a merry chase.
            Meanwhile Magdi stood to the side.  She looked at me like I was nuts, but she also looked at me like she would really like to have her possum back.  Occasionally she lunged at the possum as I made the circle yet again passing her on the right.  So there I was pushing a dead possum in a circle around the yard with a shovel, while yelling at the dog at regular intervals, like some sort of bizarre ritualistic dance. 
            I stopped, winded and frustrated, and found myself next to the oak tree across the driveway from the well.  The answer struck me, if only I had the energy left.  I pushed the shovel again.  Again it pushed the possum, this time right against the tree and the tree held it there for me as the shovel slid beneath it.  Success! 
            I lifted the shovel--and the possum rolled right off of it.  Somehow I kept from screaming.  Okay, I told myself.  You have learned something.  Possums are heavy and you have to hold the shovel handle tightly so it won’t tip.  I tried again, pushing the possum up against the tree and lifting the shovel, this time ready for the shifting weight.  Now I just had to get it to the woods.  It was a several hundred yard trip, and that possum at the end of the shovel got heavier and heavier. 
            About halfway there I knew I was not going to make it, so rather than let the thing drop in a clearing where there were no trees to push against, I carefully lowered the shovel to the ground.  As much as I hated to, I had to move my hand farther down the handle, closer to the possum so the weight would be easier to manage.  I did, and it was easier, so much easier I could even walk faster without being in danger of losing the possum.
            I was already dressed for Bible class and did not want to traipse into the woods among the briars and brush, so I carefully pulled back on the shovel and slung with all my might. The possum slid off the shovel about five feet into the brush, not much further than the length of the shovel handle.  By then, I was ready to call that a great success, and left it.
            As shocking as it might sound, that is the way we treat God sometimes.  Instead of rushing into His safe and loving embrace, we keep Him at arm’s length.  Like a teenager who is too embarrassed to act like he loves his parents, we are too embarrassed to let our love for God show to those around us.  We don’t want to look too weird, too strange, too “fanatical.” 
            Early Christians were known for their good works.  In fact, that is how they often gave themselves away to their persecutors.  They looked and acted so differently from everyone else.  No one else was kind and forgiving, even when mistreated.  Would our godly behavior give us away under similar circumstances, or would it lump us in with the crowd because our religion has not “contaminated” our lives?
            Even among ourselves we don’t want to say things that might make people look at us askance.  It’s like the old joke where the new convert sits in the pews saying, “Amen,” and “Praise God,” only to have some older member take him aside and say, “Son, we don’t praise God here.”
            God wants us close to Him.  Think about that for a moment.  Our awesome all-powerful Creator wants a relationship with us.  He made an incomprehensible sacrifice to make it possible.  Maybe we need to be shocked with this analogy, so we will wake up.  When we keep Him at arm’s length like something disgusting, we are treating God like a dead possum.
 
Wherefore also He is able to save to the uttermost them that draw near unto God through Him, seeing He ever lives to make intercession for them…Draw near to God and He will draw near to you,  Heb 7:25; James 4:8a.
 
Dene Ward

On April 12, 1577, Christian IV, who became king of Denmark and Norway, was born.  And why is he important, you ask?  It's a bit of a story, but leads us to today's point beautifully.
             Oslo, the capital of Norway, had been declared such in 1314.  In 1524, Norway became the junior partner in the Denmark-Norway Union.  Internal squabbles had made them vulnerable to a takeover, and this union seemed the easiest way to handle it.  In 1624 the city was destroyed by a fire.  It had been a good distance from the fortress that protected it, so Christian IV, who was considered by the Norwegians a Danish king, moved it closer to its protection and rebuilt it, naming it after himself, Christiania.  (Along the way, the Norwegians decided to become more "Norwegian" and changed the spelling to Kristiania.)
            By 1924, the 300th anniversary of the city, Norway had once again gained its independence and had been so for 110 years.  Being named after a Danish king wrankled a bit.  So on January 1, 1925, Oslo regained its original Norwegian name.  The name of that city meant something to its people, and that's what we are getting at today.
            He called the name of that place Bethel, but the name of the city was Luz at the first, Gen 28:19.
            Jacob had just wakened from his dream of a ladder to Heaven.  God had earlier confirmed the blessing on him that his father Isaac had given him by mistake, proving that while Isaac might have been blind, God certainly was not—the correct son received the blessing.  And so Jacob called that place “Beth-el,” the house of God.
            Fast forward several centuries and Hosea goes to Bethel, where Jeroboam I had set up one of his golden calves by which the people could worship Jehovah, “the god who brought you out of Egypt.”  By the time of Hosea most of them weren’t even pretending to worship Jehovah any longer.  This was full-fledged idolatry.  Hosea refused any longer to call it “Bethel.”
            …Enter not into Gilgal, nor go up to Beth-aven, and swear not, “As the LORD lives.” Hos 4:15.
            Three times Hosea addresses the place that way.  It was no longer “the house of God.”  It was instead Beth-aven, “the house of vanity,” or deception, or iniquity, or evil, or several other translated words, all of which made Hosea’s point quite plain.  Bethel was supposed to be a description of who was worshipped, adored, respected, and revered in that place, and it no longer qualified for the name.  Instead of “Beth-el,” it had become “Beth-aven.”
            So let’s think about this today.  We use a similar description for ourselves:  “church of Christ.”  That means we belong to Christ, we obey him, we worship him, his is the opinion that counts, not ours.  Can you still say that about the group you are a member of?  Or has it become a social group with its own rules and its own “politics?”  Has it become a place where men get together and vote on things that have nothing to do with the mission Jesus left his disciples to complete?  Can you find authority--His authority—for everything you do?  Jesus himself said in Matthew 20 that authority can only come from two places—God or man, and his acceptance of that proves that he expected you to have it.
            Too many times we ask the wrong question:  what is a church of Christ?  The question we ought to be asking is this:  when is a church of Christ?  Is it time to change the sign on your door?
 
And he put all things under his feet and gave him as head over all things to the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all. Eph 1:22-23
 
Dene Ward

I know some women who crochet and knit.  I know some women who quilt.  I know some women who draw and paint.  I know some who bake and decorate cakes.  I know women who are gardeners and canners.  I know some who put up wallpaper.  I know others who do tile.  I even know one who can put in sinks and toilets.  And no, those are not their jobs.  Those are their hobbies, or at the very least, things they do because they need to be done, and they regularly use those things to serve others as well.
            I know men who can do wiring.  I know men who can do fine woodworking.  I know men who can solder and weld.  I know men who can take an engine apart, fix it, and put it back together again.  I know men who are gardeners and expert fishermen.  I know men who are marksmen.  And once again, these are not their jobs, but their hobbies which they also use to serve others.
            Meanwhile, I see a generation of children who sit around the house playing video games, or bouncing a basketball on a court all day, or sitting on the porch steps with other kids, shooting the breeze and talking, while doing absolutely nothing worthwhile, nor learning anything useful.  Why aren't we teaching our boys and girls to do stuff?!
            Why aren't we teaching them life skills that they can use to help others?  We certainly have ample examples in the Bible.
            Adam and Eve were expected to tend a garden and live off of it.
            Rachel, Rebekah, David, and the sons of Jacob were expected to know animal husbandry as part of their families' survival.
            Ruth grew up knowing she was expected to work hard, not just for herself, but also for others, even those not blood family.
            Miriam was willing to use her musical and poetic talent to teach the women of Israel.
            Jael and Rizpah learned that being strong and brave, and doing the dirty work was someone's responsibility, and you shouldn't wait around on a man to get it done when you are the only person available.
            Dorcas learned to sew, and with that ability served the church so well that she was the one Peter raised from the dead rather than the recently slain deacon and preacher Stephen.
            I know a man whose plan for retirement is to use his considerable handyman skills to perform free labor for the widows in the church.  He learned those skills as a young man and has become a good steward of the abilities God gave him.  What do you plan for your retirement?  Spending more time serving others, or serving yourself by traveling for months on end, or playing golf several times a week, or going hunting nearly every weekend, or whatever else you think you deserve?  Do you have any plans at all for serving the church now that your time is not taken up with the necessities of making a living and raising a family?
            What do you know how to do?  What are you teaching your children how to do, and more especially, what are you teaching them about their obligations as a child of God to serve others?  Are you even home long enough to do that teaching?
            When it came time to decide if a widow deserved to be placed on the payroll, serving the church every day, what were the qualifications?  If she has a good report for her good works, if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints' feet, if she has given relief to those who were afflicted, if she has devoted herself to every good work (1Tim 5:10).  Why do you think she could do those things?  Because she learned them as a child and, most likely, watched others doing them!  What do your children see you doing?
            God wants us to serve.  He wants children who have learned to do stuff!  And he wants us out there doing that stuff, no matter our age, no matter our wealth, and certainly no matter our social status.  Service is what Christianity is all about.  Let's make sure our children will have something to offer. 
 
That you may walk worthily of the Lord, unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work and growing in the knowledge of God (Col 1:10).
 
Dene Ward

But the LORD hurled a great wind upon the sea, and there was a mighty tempest on the sea, so that the ship threatened to break up. Then the mariners were afraid, and each cried out to his god. And they hurled the cargo that was in the ship into the sea to lighten it for them. But Jonah had gone down into the inner part of the ship and had lain down and was fast asleep. So the captain came and said to him, “What do you mean, you sleeper? Arise, call out to your god! Perhaps the god will give a thought to us, that we may not perish” Jonah 1:4-6.
            From what I’ve heard all my life, you’d think that the “big fish” in Jonah is the only thing worth talking about.  Our Prophets class has found far more and this is just a quick overview class, nothing as detailed as verse by verse.
            The passage above may not be the first lesson we garnered from Jonah, but it is one we need more than we realize.  Here is Jonah, the only Jew, the only member of God’s covenant people, on this boat as a mighty storm threatens to engulf it and take them all to a watery grave, and he is the only one not praying.  In fact, a heathen captain has to take him to task to get him started.
            Have you ever been embarrassed by the zeal of a “heathen” friend or neighbor when that zeal should have come from you first?  Have you ever fallen to pieces while one of them calmly said, “Let’s pray about this,” and did?  Have you ever related a wonderful occurrence in your life without once mentioning the goodness of God only to have someone else “give God the glory” with every other word?  Have you ever had your door knocked on by someone looking to convert a soul when you have never even invited a friend to services?  We are Jonah, folks, far too many times.
            I would blame it on such a fervent desire to avoid false doctrine that we pushed the pendulum much too far.  I would do that except for this—nowadays I am not even sure we know which “false doctrine” we are trying to avoid.  It has simply become tradition.  We don’t do anything to call attention to ourselves, nor to God for that matter.  We want to be quiet and comfortable, certainly not “out there” with our religion, and so our God is not praised nor thanked nor acknowledged when He should be.  “We don’t do that,” I’ve heard it said.  And I, for one, would like to know why.
            None of those things is foreign to the scriptures.  You find all of them abounding in the epistles and saturating the Psalms.  God is everywhere.  What He does is always mentioned.  He is the reason for praise, for fear, for awe, and He expects us to acknowledge it. 
            Why didn’t Jonah do so?  Because he was trying to get away from God.  He was trying to avoid his mission.  He had God placed in a box in a town in a covenant land and thought if he got far enough away, God would forget about him. 
            Is that why we do it?  Are we trying to avoid God everywhere except the church building?  Is it far more comfortable to hide ourselves with silence than to proclaim our faith?   
            When the world can shame my faith, can I even keep calling it that?
 
Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths, Prov 3:5-6.
 
Dene Ward

If Jesus was only a man, how happened it that the methods he adopted are as unlike the methods of men as the end he sought is unlike the end that any man ever yet proposed to himself?  How happened it that in his plans he did everything that a man would not do, and nothing—all history being witness—that a man would do?...Looking at it all as a man might, was there then a single human probability that the cause represented by the crucified Galilean would have the least place in history?  That it would abide among men for a single generation?  If Jesus was only a man could anything conceivable by the human mind be more impossible than the realization of the dream (if he was only a man, it was but a dream) of this man of Galilee, crucified like a felon? 

Man of Galilee by Atticus G Haywood

We know that God has spoken to Moses, but as for this man, we do not know where he comes from.” The man answered, “Why, this is an amazing thing! You do not know where he comes from, and yet he opened my eyes (John 9:29-30).

One Sunday, a newly married young woman named Jessie Pounds did not feel well, so her husband went on to church without her. When he returned. she had written the words to this hymn.

Somewhere the sun is shining,
Somewhere the songbirds dwell;
Hush, then, thy sad repining,
God lives, and all is well.

Refrain:
Somewhere, somewhere,
Beautiful Isle of Somewhere!
Land of the true, where we live anew,
Beautiful Isle of Somewhere!

Somewhere the day is longer,
Somewhere the task is done;
Somewhere the heart is stronger,
Somewhere the guerdon won.
(Refrain)

Somewhere the load is lifted,
Close by an open door;
Somewhere the clouds are rifted,
Somewhere the angels sing.
(Refrain)
 
           Because it is well over a hundred years old, the song contains a couple of words that might be unfamiliar to us.  Do you know what it means to “repine?”  The song gives us a clue with the modifier “sad.”  I doubt I am doing anything joyful if I am repining.  No, the word means dejection or discontent. 
And how about “guerdon?”  The song says we “win” it, whatever it is.  And if you look it up you will find the terse definition “reward.”

Obviously young Mrs. Pounds was allowing her illness to depress her, and the act of writing this song, reminding herself of the hope she had as a Christian, cheered her up.  She wanted to share that hope with us. 

I can already hear some of my brothers talking about how “unscriptural” this song is.  Where does it say there will be songbirds in Heaven?  And certainly Revelation says there is no need for sun because God is the light.  May I just say this?  Those literalists are missing the whole point.  John’s Revelation uses figurative language to describe Heaven.  If you think there will be pearly gates and streets of gold, you are just as mistaken as Mrs. Pounds.  But somehow, I think she knew that; I think she was motivating herself with her own special view of what Heaven must be like.

The descriptions in Revelation are about motivators.  Those first century Christians lived a day to day existence.  They prayed for their “daily bread” because they had no idea if they would have enough that day, let alone tomorrow.  The farmers among them existed at the mercy of the weather and natural disasters.  The shopkeepers and artisans lived at the mercy of the economy.  No one was going to “bail them out.”

To those people, a place so wealthy that gold and precious jewels were used as construction material, meant security.  It meant rest from working long hours day after day to simply survive.
 
Those people lived under the rule of a foreign king.  Doubtless they had all seen wars and battles.  They knew, in fact, that the Barbarian Hordes could still come over the mountains and wipe them out.  Did 9/11 cause you some concern?  Has it made you worry more about the possibility of terrorists under every bush?  Those first century Christians lived with that sort of uncertainty every day of their lives.  In fact, they probably had more safety as a conquered people than ever before.  But the picture of a huge city with huge walls meant safety and peace forever.  Security—that is what those pictures of Heaven were all about, not materialism.  I have no doubt that if John were writing to us, he would use other motivators.

Frankly, I feel we should give ourselves motivators that mean something to us personally, and we should do the same for our children.  “Getting to worship God forever and ever,” translates to a child as having to go to church, listen to sermons, and sit still forever.  If you think that will motivate them to want to serve God all their lives, you didn’t have any business becoming a parent in the first place. 

And that is what Mrs. Pounds has tried to share with us.  On a day of illness that drug her down, she went to the best place to pull herself out of it—thoughts of Heaven, the reward, the “guerdon.”  Perhaps if we sang more songs about the reward, we would do a better job of gaining it.
 
…we heard of your faith in Christ Jesus and of the love that you have for all the saints, because of the hope laid up for you in heaven…Col 1:4-5.
 
Dene Ward

The first time I saw a red letter edition of the Bible, I was a child and thought it was the coolest thing I had ever seen.  Imagine!  All the words of Jesus in red!  But as I grew older I began to see the problem with that.  Too many of my friends thought those were the only words in the Bible that counted.  If Paul or Peter or John or James said it, they didn't have to listen.  The only words that mattered were Jesus' words.  So they wouldn't listen to Acts 2:38, or 22:16.  They wouldn't look at Acts 20:7 or Col 3:16.  And forget about Ephesians 4:4-6.
Sometimes I think I have a few brethren like that, too.  While they hang on to the words of the Lord, they will regularly "argue" with the men who wrote about him.  So let me give you a verse or two to consider this morning. 

Dear friends, this is now the second letter I have written to you; in both letters, I want to develop a genuine understanding with a reminder, so that you can remember the words previously spoken by the holy prophets and the command of our Lord and Savior given through your apostles (2Pet 3:1-2).  Yes, I fully admit to taking this out of context, but even so, Peter is not only talking about the words he is writing in his two letters, but those of the other apostles as well.  Not only that, he puts the words of the "holy prophets" on the same plain as the Lord's.  What he is saying is, Scripture is Scripture, folks.

We are from God. Anyone who knows God listens to us; anyone who is not from God does not listen to us.  From this we know the Spirit of truth and the spirit of deception (1John 4:6).  In this one, John is not talking about just this epistle, or even all of his epistles, but all the writing of the inspired men.  If you don't listen to them, you are "not from God."  Can't be much plainer, can he?

But all this just avoids the real issue.  For many people, it doesn't matter who said it at all if they don't want to hear it.  The kind of Bible they really want is a MY letter edition, whichever parts they like and want to hear.  And what does Peter have to say about that?

"If any man speaks, let him speak as the oracles of God…" (1 Pet 4:11).  Which is to say, let him speak only the truth, understanding the incredible responsibility involved in speaking the Word of God.  Whether he likes it or not.
 
Finally then, brothers, we ask and encourage you in the Lord Jesus, that as you have received from us how you must walk and please God — as you are doing — do so even more. For you know what commands we gave you through the Lord Jesus  (1Thess 4:1-2).
 
Dene Ward

The other morning I headed for the bluebird houses to give them a good cleaning out.  "Before nesting season," I wanted to add, but it was early March already, and as I made my way to the farthest house, a daddy bluebird flitted out and sat on the fence before I could get there.  I put on the brakes immediately.  He was doing his job of trying to distract something he thought of as a predator away from the nest.  Yes, I was indeed too late, and had suspected so already.  Late January would have been much better. 

I headed for the next bluebird house a little more slowly and quietly.  Nothing flew out as I approached, so I carefully unlatched and opened the door and saw what appeared to be a brand new nest, waiting for the Mama and her eggs.  Another too little, too late moment for me.  The third house was the only one we could actually clean an old nest out of, and make ready for a new avian family.  Next year I will do better!

I have watched birds parenting their babies for fifteen years now and it always amazes me.  I have seen cardinals bring their young to the feeder to show them where to eat.  I have seen a mockingbird do the same as that first bluebird I mentioned, flying away from the nest in hopes of distracting me from the eggs, and later the nestlings.  I have seen a hawk teach her babies how to hunt, bringing them back to the nest in the evening with whatever prey they have found, a good week of lessons before the young hawk finally flew away to fend on its own.  I have seen a mama wren teaching her little ones to fly, watching them carefully as they flitted barely a foot off the ground, moving with them around the house until they could finally lift themselves high enough to safety.

All of those small feathered parents have succeeded in their tasks.  The babies eat and grow, learn and practice, and ultimately leave behind an "empty nest" to begin their own lives, to have their own babies, and do the same teaching all over again.

I wonder about some human parents.  Some of us forget that the point of teaching is to work our way out of a job.  If your children still need you to tell them how to behave, how to take care of their personal hygiene, how to handle money, how to get along with others, how to obey the laws of the land and stay out of trouble, when they are approaching thirty, what in the world did you do all those years when you had them as a "captive audience?"  If they cannot leave the nest and survive in the world, something went dreadfully wrong.

Some parents are too sheltering.  It is one thing to hide the ugliness of the world from a little one, it is another to allow a teenager to think everyone is a friend and can be trusted implicitly, even the stranger on the street corner.  If, as I did, you live mainly among your brethren, your children will more than likely be taken advantage of one way or the other because they have not learned that not everyone out there has good intentions.  It's up to you to warn them.

Some parents want so badly to be their child's "friend" that they do not act like the parents they truly need, teaching them responsibility and a good work ethic.  So we continually pick up after them and wait on them like they are royalty, granting every wish their heart desires.  Meanwhile, they never learn how to take care of themselves and, in fact, as adults they do not, wreaking havoc on their physical health, their economic reputations, and their ability to work for a living.  One reason we chose to live in the country is that the chores were not make-work.  Helping their father cut wood, stack it so it would be preserved, and carry it to the wood stove in the house, kept us warm on cold, winter days.  They knew their work mattered.  Do you know how those Bible characters did so well as children?  People in those times raised their children to be responsible over serious matters from the time they could walk.  They were expected to be adults, having families and providing for them by their mid-teens because they were trained to be able to do that by then.  (No. I am not advocating teen marriages.)  We mollycoddle them, then wonder why they are still so immature at 16 and 17!  Meanwhile, we expect them to be able to commit their lives to God at 12, when our culture does not prepare them for such a thing.  That does not mean a particular set of parents can't do it, but how many of those twelve year olds still have to be nagged into doing their Bible lessons and refuse to turn off the video games to do so?  They have no clue what lifetime commitment and devotion mean at all.

Some parents shield their children from the consequences of their mistakes.  We want to "fix" everything for them if we can, but at some point, we need to stop that.  They will grow up thinking they will always get out of the messes they make of their lives unscathed.  Far better to let them suffer a tiny bit on something that may seem earth-shattering at the age of 8 and learn the lesson then, than to let them learn it as they sit across the table from a probation officer, or worse, in a prison cell.  At that point, it may even be impossible for them to learn.

And some parents seem to think that their children should never leave the nest at all.  Oh, they might have their own apartments or even houses, but it had better be close by and we had better see them several times a week!  And many children love it.  They are so used to Mom doing their laundry and cooking their meals they wouldn't want it any other way.  That "empty nest" that so many are afraid of is perfectly normal.  That's why it is so important to keep your marriage strong—one of these days, God meant that it would just be the two of you again, as it was for your parents when you left the nest. 

If we were all birds, I can't help but wonder how many of our children would survive.  How many would never learn to fly and wind up easy pickings for the neighbor's cat, or out here in the country, the coyotes, foxes, bobcats, and snakes?  How many would starve because they never learned how to provide for themselves?  And how long before all birds ceased to exist because all the babies stayed in the nest without forming normal healthy relationships with anyone except Mom and Dad?

I used to tell my piano students that my job was to help them reach the point that they no longer needed me.  That's a hard thing for a parent to even contemplate, but all things being equal, one day we will be gone long before they are.  What will happen to your little birds then?
 
Yea, the stork in the heavens knows her appointed times; and the turtle-dove and the swallow and the crane observe the time of their coming; but my people know not the law of Jehovah, Jer 8:7                                                          
 
Dene Ward