We visited our son a couple of months ago—the bachelor son.  He always spends nearly a full day cleaning before we arrive.  I know it’s true—you can smell the pines, the lemons, and the bleach when you walk in the door.  The vacuum, the broom, and the mop are usually still standing in the corner.  The bed is made with fresh, crisp sheets and his best towels hang in the bathroom.  He has obviously worked hard.

              But he is a man.  Some things he just doesn’t see or even think to look for.  I was loading the dishwasher one morning and after rinsing a plate my eyes fell on the window sill.  A layer of dust coated it, which, being in the kitchen where cooking grease rises in the steam and settles with an adhesive and almost audible thump, couldn’t just be quickly wiped away. 

              That evening when I stepped out of the shower, I saw the top of the baseboards.  And that’s when it hit me.  What about my baseboards?  What about my kitchen window sill?  When was the last time I cleaned them?  When was the last time I even thought to look and see if they needed cleaning?

              It’s so much easier to see someone else’s dirt—and that goes for spiritual dirt too.  Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye but don’t notice the log in your own eye?  Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and look, there’s a log in your eye?  Hypocrite! First take the log out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye,  Matt 7:3-5.  Jesus warns us about judging others more harshly than ourselves, about expecting perfection from others who might actually be closer to it than we are.  My son’s apartment was a lot cleaner than the house I left behind at that point.

              It takes a practiced eye to see the dirt.  I still remember the day I really learned to wipe off the dinner table.  I thought I’d done exactly that, but my mother called me back.  Indeed I had gotten every crumb and obvious spill but she showed me how to lean so that the overhead light shone on the table.  I had wiped, but had only smeared butter, gravy, and other assorted foodstuffs.  First you wipe up the crumbs and spills, then you rinse your cloth and actually clean the table.

              Experienced housekeepers know that kitchen surfaces collect greasy dirt and that any flat surface—even narrow little baseboards—collect dust.  They know ceilings “grow” cobwebs and shower doors amass soap scum.  They know that wiping off the top of anything isn’t even half the battle.  There are sides, a bottom, and sometimes insides that need our careful attention.

              Maybe it’s time to do a real housecleaning on ourselves.  If you don’t know where to look for dirt, try all those places you find it so easily in others.
             
“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence! Blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup, so the outside of it may also become clean. Matt 23:25,26.
 
Dene Ward

After six months, working 20-30 minutes at the time, I finally finished stacking that woodpile.  When it became apparent that I was near the end, and I hoped “this” would be the last load, I stacked the garden cart just a little too high. 

            Have you seen those old Garden Way carts?  A large wooden three sided box sits on two bicycle tires, with two props in front (instead of two more wheels) and a tubular handle that comes straight out from the bottom of the cart.  You lift on that handle and pull or push the cart at an angle to the ground.  Basically, it’s one giant lever. 

            Since I was hoping to finish that day, I started stacking the wood into the cart from the back, behind the wheels.  Instead of laying the whole first layer, which would have been so much smarter, I kept stacking the back higher and higher.  Then as I turned around to grab a log for the first layer on the front end of the cart, I heard a sudden WHAM!  I was almost afraid to look, but when I did, I saw that the cart had tipped and fallen on its back and all that carefully stacked wood had tumbled out onto the ground.  Instead of balancing the weight on, behind, and in front of the wheels, I had put it all behind the wheels.  What should I have expected?  God doesn’t ordinarily change the laws of physics when his children act in a less than intelligent manner.

            We all have tipping points and we are often just as brainless about them.  God warns us over and over that sin can enslave us.  It isn’t something we can dabble in and then step out when we’re ready to.  Peter says we reach a point when we “cannot cease from sin” (2 Pet 2:14).  Paul says we can become “past feeling” at which point we will “give ourselves over” to unrighteousness (Eph 4:19).  He also talks about people who have their “consciences branded” (1 Tim 4:2). 

            Slaves were branded in the first century.  When, having sinned over and over, we reach the point that we have become “obedient slaves of sin” (Rom 6:16), our consciences become branded.  We may think we are free, but that is part of the entrapment.  Somewhere along the line we have become addicted to our sin and we cannot stop, cannot cease, have given ourselves over to this master.

            And when that happens God “gives us over” as well (Rom 1:24).  Whatever we want to do, He will allow, however we want to live, He will not stand in the way.  “There remains no longer a sacrifice” for us (Heb 10:26).

            When do we reach that tipping point?  I do not know.  I do know that the thought of it scares me to death.  If anything will keep me righteous, maybe that is it—the idea that somewhere along the way I can reach a point where even God gives up on me.  Maybe that will make me stay away from that balancing act altogether. 

            Does that make me yet another kind of slave?  You bet—a slave of righteousness.  But tipping over in that direction will bring an entirely different result.
 
Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the form of teaching to which you were committed, and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness.  For just as you once presented your members as slaves to impurity and to lawlessness leading to more lawlessness, so now present your members as slaves to righteousness leading to sanctification… But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life.  Rom 6:16-19,22.
 
Dene Ward
 

You probably discovered last week how bad we are about trying to explain God.  Just think how many times we had to use that STOP sign.  And if you didn’t use it, shame on you.  The secret things belong unto the LORD our God... Deut 29:29

            The Godhead itself is an incomprehensible relationship.  As much as we try to liken it to other things, it is not.  It is unique and, in the scriptures, unexplained.  That alone makes it unexplainable.

            If we could truly understand God, then we wouldn’t worship Him.  By “explaining” Him, we bring Him down to our level, and our level certainly is not worth worshipping.  It is “reverence” masked by irreverence. 

            And we also have something not only unexplainable, but unthinkable:
Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus: Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross. Phil 2:5-8   God became human.
           
Forasmuch then as the children are partakers of flesh and blood, he also himself likewise took part of the same; that through death he might destroy him that had the power of death, that is, the devil; Heb 2:14  He partook of flesh and blood.

In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and was God…And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth. John 1:1, 14.  God became flesh.
           
For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Heb 4:15.  He was in all points tempted.

            For God to become human should not just be amazing, it should be a staggering thought.  If it has never taken your breath away and knocked you off your feet, figuratively anyway, you just don’t get it.  In spite of yourself, you have absorbed too much denominational theology.  You’ve spent too much time with Augustine of Hippo and his Reformation disciples.    And that’s where we will finish next week.
 
Dene Ward

Part 7 of a continuing Monday series.  If you have not been with us, you really need to backtrack and read the first 6.  Even if you have been, with a week off, it might help to reread at least the last couple.

            Remember those stop signs you made last week?  Run and get it before we start.  You are really going to need it this week.  And more than that you will need to be willing to examine what you truly believe and the words and phrases you commonly use. 

            First let me ask you this:  why do you pray?  Believe it or not, there is a theology out there that does not believe God will change His mind if you ask.  Now don’t be so quick to judge.  The word they use is “immutability,” which we often use ourselves, and which is NOT a Bible word. 

            First, let’s look at a few passages.  Will our prayers indeed influence God?

            In his discussion of the coming destruction of Jerusalem Jesus said, “Pray that your flight not be in winter or on a Sabbath,” Matt 24:20.

            He also says, “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him! Matt 7:7-11.

            And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart. Luke 18:1.

            Jesus seemed to believe our prayers would make a difference in God’s actions.  The word “immutability,” though, means “beyond the ability to change.”  Add that to the word “omniscience,” also a word not found in the Bible, which means “knowledge of everything past, present, and future, and therefore never surprised,” and you get a doctrine that says since God knows everything, then He knows the best course of action and the right thing to do and any change would mean He had made a mistake.  That is mainstream theology.

            STOP!  You are sitting there getting ready to say, “Yes, but---“  Don’t.  Just listen, and more important, read what God has to say about Himself.

            In those days Hezekiah became sick and was at the point of death. And Isaiah the prophet the son of Amoz came to him and said to him, “Thus says the LORD, ‘Set your house in order, for you shall die; you shall not recover.’” Then Hezekiah turned his face to the wall and prayed to the LORD, saying, “Now, O LORD, please remember how I have walked before you in faithfulness and with a whole heart, and have done what is good in your sight.” And Hezekiah wept bitterly. And before Isaiah had gone out of the middle court, the word of the LORD came to him: “Turn back, and say to Hezekiah the leader of my people, Thus says the LORD, the God of David your father: I have heard your prayer; I have seen your tears. Behold, I will heal you. On the third day you shall go up to the house of the LORD, and I will add fifteen years to your life. I will deliver you and this city out of the hand of the king of Assyria, and I will defend this city for my own sake and for my servant David's sake.” 2Kgs 20:1-6.

            And I[God] thought, ‘After she has done all this she will return to me,’ but she did not return, and her treacherous sister Judah saw it. Jer 3:7.

            “‘I [God] said, How I would set you among my sons, and give you a pleasant land, a heritage most beautiful of all nations. And I thought you would call me, My Father, and would not turn from following me. ​Surely, as a treacherous wife leaves her husband, so have you been treacherous to me, O house of Israel, declares the LORD.’” Jer 3:19-20/

            And they have built the high places of Topheth, which is in the Valley of the Son of Hinnom, to burn their sons and their daughters in the fire, which I did not command, nor did it come into my mind. Jer 7:31.

          And have built the high places of Baal to burn their sons in the fire as burnt offerings to Baal, which I did not command or decree, nor did it come into my mind-- Jer 19:5.

          They built the high places of Baal in the Valley of the Son of Hinnom, to offer up their sons and daughters to Molech, though I did not command them, nor did it enter into my mind, that they should do this abomination, to cause Judah to sin. Jer 32:35.

          STOP!  You’re about to do it again, I know you are.  You are trying to explain away the plain statements of God about Himself.  What you are doing is trying to make an incomprehensible Being comprehensible to a human mind and that is the ultimate irreverence.  Guess what?  We are not finished yet.  This one will knock your socks off:

          He said, “Do not lay your hand on the boy or do anything to him, for now I know that you fear God, seeing you have not withheld your son, your only son, from me.” Gen 22:12.

          STOP!  Someone out there is thinking, “Are you trying to say…” I (and the teacher I sat under last summer) are not saying anything.  God is.  Do not tell God what He means to be saying and then call it respect.

          There are many, many times in the Bible that God says, “If.”  This one may be the most famous:

          Then the word of the LORD came to me: “O house of Israel, can I not do with you as this potter has done? declares the LORD. Behold, like the clay in the potter's hand, so are you in my hand, O house of Israel. If at any time I declare concerning a nation or a kingdom, that I will pluck up and break down and destroy it, and if that nation, concerning which I have spoken, turns from its evil, I will relent of the disaster that I intended to do to it. And if at any time I declare concerning a nation or a kingdom that I will build and plant it, and if it does evil in my sight, not listening to my voice, then I will relent of the good that I had intended to do to it. Jer 18:5-10.

          Here is the conclusion of all this; God always bases His action on men’s behavior.  And that means not everything is set in stone.  Even God says so.  When you try to push these un-Biblical words on people and define them so strictly, then you wind up with doctrines never taught in the Bible.  And when you do, you wind up with things that are totally inexplicable, like the following passage.

          David knew that Saul was plotting harm against him. And he said to Abiathar the priest, “Bring the ephod here.” Then David said, “O LORD, the God of Israel, your servant has surely heard that Saul seeks to come to Keilah, to destroy the city on my account. Will the men of Keilah surrender me into his hand? Will Saul come down, as your servant has heard? O LORD, the God of Israel, please tell your servant.” And the LORD said, “He will come down.” Then David said, “Will the men of Keilah surrender me and my men into the hand of Saul?” And the LORD said, “They will surrender you.” Then David and his men, who were about six hundred, arose and departed from Keilah, and they went wherever they could go. When Saul was told that David had escaped from Keilah, he gave up the expedition. 1Sam 23:9-13.

          Oops!  God said something was going to happen and it didn’t.  Why?  Because men’s behavior changed what happened.  When we force things on our understanding of God, we always get into trouble.  Better to let God tell us how He acts and thinks, and keep from putting both our feet into our mouths hip-deep. 

          Keep your stop sign handy.  There is more to come.
 
Dene Ward

Part 4 in a continuing Monday morning series.  Read this one carefully, and do NOT skip the scriptures!
           
Last time we talked about God’s immanence, his desire to connect with us and have a relationship with us.  God wants “to dwell in our midst.”  But what makes that even more amazing is God’s transcendence, His “Otherness.”  God is so far beyond our understanding that we cannot even comprehend the difference between Him and us.  But the ones who truly realize this show it in fear.  Please note:  “fear” is not a naughty word in the Bible.  It is an entirely appropriate emotion in the right place.

            For the LORD spoke thus to me with his strong hand upon me, and warned me not to walk in the way of this people, saying: “Do not call conspiracy all that this people calls conspiracy, and do not fear what they fear, nor be in dread. But the LORD of hosts, him you shall honor as holy. Let him be your fear, and let him be your dread. Isa 8:11-13.  Whom you fear shows your faithfulness to God.

            There shall come forth a shoot from the stump of Jesse, and a branch from his roots shall bear fruit. And the Spirit of the LORD shall rest upon him, the Spirit of wisdom and understanding, the Spirit of counsel and might, the Spirit of knowledge and the fear of the LORD. Isa 11:1-2  Even the Messiah would “fear the Lord.”

            That fear did not stop in the first century, under the New Covenant.  So the church throughout all Judea and Galilee and Samaria had peace and was being built up. And walking in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit, it multiplied. Acts 9:31

            That word, while it can be translated reverence, also means dread and terror.  Do not minimize it or weaken it because then you will miss the point of God’s transcendence.  In Ex 33 18-23, Moses asks to see God.  God tells him that He will allow Moses to see His goodness, but “you cannot see my face for man cannot see my face and live” (Ex 18:20.  It isn’t that God will kill someone who sees Him; it’s that we mere humans cannot stand to see such a glorious Being—we would die from it; our physical bodies cannot take it!

            Think for a minute about the call of Isaiah.  Chapter 6 begins with the statement that he saw God on his throne, but what did he really look at?  The throne, the train of his robe, the seraphim above the throne, and the smoke filling the room.  Nothing at all is said about how God Himself looks, but even those surrounding things send Isaiah into a panic, sure he will now die because he, a man, has been in the presence of such holiness.

            Look at Ezekiel’s experience in 1:26-28.  He uses the words “like,” “likeness,” “appearance,” and “as it were” again and again.  Is he really seeing God or something that looks like it might be God?  And even that causes him “to fall on his face.”

            When we weaken the concept of fearing God, we lose even the minute understanding we can have of God’s greatness, His glory, His holiness, and His might.  Even the term we often sing about—awe—has become a word denoting the trivial.  “That’s awesome,” we say of everything from basketball shots to a free ice cream cone on your birthday.  We’ve turned God into a big Granddaddy whose lap we can jump into and say, “Hi Pops!”

            When we lessen the fear, we lose the thing it was designed to create as well.  that you may fear the LORD your God, you and your son and your son's son, …by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long. Deut 6:2, and in Ex 20:20, that the fear of Him may be before you that you may not sin.  The fear keeps us from sinning.

            And do not for a minute think that fear lessens love.  For one thing, recognizing the awesomeness, in its true meaning, of God, and knowing that still He wants to have a relationship with us in spite of the great divide in our beings, should inspire love.  God expects this love to be a natural reaction from us.  “And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, Deut 10:12.

            A proper recognition of God’s transcendence, a being so far above us that He should not even care about us, yet He does, is essential to serving God properly. 
 
If you, O LORD, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who could stand? But with you there is forgiveness, that you may be feared. Ps 130:3-4
 
Dene Ward

I tried to call Keith from the doctor’s office the other day.  I had just stepped out of the elevator and was standing in an enclosed “breezeway” between the bank of elevators and the eye clinic, lined with windows and a view of the city from four floors up.  The little screen on the phone showed “Calling work,” then suddenly switched back to the home screen.  I never did hear it ring on the other end.  I tried twice more but both times the phone stayed silent. 

            I knew I had called from that site before, so I stepped a few paces to the left and tried again.  This time I got a rough ring on the other end and Keith picked up.   We still had a difficult conversation between the phone connection losing every other word of his and him being so deaf that even an amplifier is not an instant cure, but at least we communicated the necessities—I had managed to make another trip into town without running over anyone or anyone running into me.

            Sometimes we have difficulty making connections with God, and usually that is our fault—we are standing in the wrong place. 
 
But your iniquities have separated between you and your God, and your sins have hid his face from you, so that he will not hear. Isa 59:2
If I regard iniquity in my heart, The Lord will not hear, Psa 66:18.
And he said, I will hide my face from them, I will see what their end shall be: For they are a very perverse generation, Children in whom is no faithfulness, Deut 32:20.
 
            We overstate the matter, and miss the point entirely, when we say God only hears Christians.  He heard Cornelius’s prayer before he was converted, Acts 10:4.  God answered that “prayer of a sinner,” not with the instant forgiveness promised by televangelists today, but by sending Peter to preach the gospel, Acts 11:14, “words whereby you shall be saved.”

            The passages listed above were all said of people who claimed to be children of God, “children in whom there is no faithfulness,” yet people we would have called “believers” today.  Faithfulness involves dependent trust.  When God’s people in the Old Testament began relying on the gods of their pagan neighbors, participating in their worship, while at the same time claiming to worship him, he had them carried into captivity as a punishment.

            What are you relying on besides God?  Whatever it is, it stands between you and the connection you so badly need to help you handle life’s difficulties.  If you pray and pray and pray, yet still feel deserted by God, look around.  Are you standing behind a pillar of self-reliance?  Do you count your financial preparations as the ultimate security?  Do you look at the life you have led thus far and find yourself so completely satisfied with your efforts that you think you have salvation “in the bag?”  Security in the promises of God is one thing—arrogance and self-righteousness is quite another.  When we trust in anything besides God, we have become the same faithless children as those ancient Jews.

            God never tells us that life will be easy.  He never says that nothing bad will happen to us as long as we are faithful.  What he does tell us, is that as long as we rely on him alone, he will not forsake us.  He will give us the help we need to get through the tough times, and ultimately to the eternal salvation that will make this life look like a mere blink of the eye.

            Are you having a difficult time making a connection with God these days?  Take a step or two in the right direction, and suddenly the signal will become loud and clear.
 
And Asa cried unto Jehovah his God, and said, Jehovah, there is none besides you to help, between the mighty and him who has no strength: help us, O Jehovah our God; for we rely on you…Oh Jehovah you are our God, 2 Chron 14:11.
 
Dene Ward

Last time we talked about knowing who and what God is, and the way He interacts with people.  Let’s look a little further at the reason and the method He chooses to interact with us.

            You shall not make yourselves detestable with any swarming thing that swarms, and you shall not defile yourselves with them, and become unclean through them. For I am the LORD your God. Consecrate yourselves therefore, and be holy, for I am holy. You shall not defile yourselves with any swarming thing that crawls on the ground. For I am the LORD who brought you up out of the land of Egypt to be your God. You shall therefore be holy, for I am holy.” Lev 11:43-45.

            And the LORD spoke to Moses, saying, “Speak to all the congregation of the people of Israel and say to them, You shall be holy, for I the LORD your God am holy. Every one of you shall revere his mother and his father, and you shall keep my Sabbaths: I am the LORD your God. Do not turn to idols or make for yourselves any gods of cast metal: I am the LORD your God. Lev 19:1-4.

            Consecrate yourselves, therefore, and be holy, for I am the LORD your God. Lev 20:7

            You shall be holy to me, for I the LORD am holy and have separated you from the peoples, that you should be mine. Lev 20:26

            After reading those verses back to back, one cannot help but be impressed with the holiness of God, that this is the “why” of every command God gives.  After this beginning, whenever He gives a command, God merely says, “I am Jehovah,” and expects them to remember that His essence demands their holiness if they are to relate to Him at all.  Check out Leviticus chapters 18 and 19 to see for yourself.

            From the beginning, God wanted a relationship with his creation.  And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day... Gen 3:8.  It seems He had a regular date with Adam and Eve to get together and talk, an appointment that was lost in their sin and that He took great pains to regain.

            When He brought His people out of Egypt, He tried to set up the same sort of relationship. 

            And let them make me a sanctuary, that I may dwell in their midst. Exod 25:8

            There I will meet with the people of Israel, and it shall be sanctified by my glory. I will consecrate the tent of meeting and the altar. Aaron also and his sons I will consecrate to serve me as priests. I will dwell among the people of Israel and will be their God. And they shall know that I am the LORD their God, who brought them out of the land of Egypt that I might dwell among them. I am the LORD their God. Exod 29:43-46

            I will make my dwelling among you, and my soul shall not abhor you. And I will walk among you and will be your God, and you shall be my people. Lev 26:11-12

            Once again His people rejected that relationship, but do not relegate that concept to the Old Covenant.  God is still trying to reach us in this intimate way.

            What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, “I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 2Cor 6:16

            in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit. Eph 2:21-22

            The first of those two passages applies to individuals and the second to the church, his spiritual Temple.  God wants to be among us.  In fact, God wants what He had in the beginning, a relationship that, this time, will continue for Eternity.

            Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband….through the middle of the street of the city; also, on either side of the river, the tree of life with its twelve kinds of fruit, yielding its fruit each month. The leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations… And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God, Rev 21:1-2; 22:2; 21:3.
 
Dene Ward

When I am speaking to several hundred ladies, I cannot see the faces in front of me much past the first row.  But more often than not, I speak to much smaller groups, as few as a dozen up to fifty or sixty.  I can usually see more of those faces, at least the ones in the front half of the room.  Other speakers do not have my problem.  The preacher in your congregation may well be able to see every one of you.  You might be surprised at what you tell him as you sit there.  I have seen all of these things myself, just in the first few rows, so I know it’s true.

            A speaker knows when your mind is on something else.  You have a tendency to stare.  Your eyes glaze over and you miss all the cues—everyone laughs but you don’t; people turn pages in their Bibles and yours sits in your lap untouched; an inappropriate smile creases your face after a serious and sober statement.

            A speaker knows when you have somewhere to be right after services.  You keep looking at your watch.  You start patting your foot about 5 minutes before the usual ending time.  You stack up your Bibles before he even begins the invitation and have the songbook ready as if you could actually rush the song leader through the invitation song.

            A speaker knows when you are bored.  You stop looking at him and start fiddling with things—doodling, flipping through your Bible or the song book, making notes about something even when he hasn’t clicked the Power Point or listed a passage. 

            A speaker knows when you disagree with him.  You squint and pull that lower lip into a frown.  You start rapidly flipping through your Bible and running your fingers down the pages looking for ways to contradict him.  You cross your arms and huff.  Sometimes you even shake your head for all to see.

            A speaker knows when you are sick or just plain tired.  You try your best to listen, but keep losing interest.  You grimace.  You touch your stomach or rub your head or try gallantly not to nod off, only to do so at least three or four times.

            A speaker also knows when you are eagerly listening, trying your best to take in what he is saying and accommodate it to all the other things you have learned about that particular subject.  He recognizes a lover of God’s Word and that person, and his fellows, are why he does what he does, week after week, no matter how few of you there might be.

            Do you think God doesn’t know the same things about us?  Sometimes I wonder.  It doesn’t really matter what the preacher sees on our faces or in our actions.  No matter how far back I sit, God still knows the heart I bring to His worship.  He knows whether I am coming to please Him or to see how much everyone can please me.  He knows whether I have a heart of repentance or one that just goes through the motions.

            So this Sunday, be careful the tales you tell from your seat—even without opening your mouth.
 
“As for you, son of man, your people who talk together about you by the walls and at the doors of the houses, say to one another, each to his brother, ‘Come, and hear what the word is that comes from the LORD.’ And they come to you as people come, and they sit before you as my people, and they hear what you say but they will not do it; for with lustful talk in their mouths they act; their heart is set on their gain. And behold, you are to them like one who sings lustful songs with a beautiful voice and plays well on an instrument, for they hear what you say, but they will not do it. Ezek 33:30-32
 
Dene Ward

I remember it like it was yesterday.  A young woman in the church, an early thirty-something as I recall, asked me to go to her friend’s house and talk with her.  The woman had some “questions” and she thought a preacher’s wife would be the perfect person to answer them.  Now throw this into the mix:  I was 21.  I had been married a little over a year and had been a full time preacher’s wife for about 6 months.  This was my first time in the counselor role, and it was a doozy.

            Why?  Because this young woman’s marriage was on the rocks.  She was a member of one of the standard cult-type denominations and her church leaders had told her it was up to her to keep her marriage intact, even though her husband was not a member and was threatening to leave her.  “What do I do if he does?” she asked, near tears.

            At that point I knew there was no sense talking “the plan of salvation” or the church with her.  What I saw was a desperate young woman in pain.  She was three or four years older than I and judging by her young children, had been married about that many years longer, but she still looked to me to answer her question, even though at that point in my life I looked about 16.  I turned to 1 Cor 7:10-15 and read it to her, culminating in, “If the unbelieving depart, let him depart, the brother or sister is not under bondage in such cases.”

            She looked at me in amazement.  “Why didn’t my own leaders show me this?  Why did they tell me I was in sin if I didn’t figure out a way to make him stay?”  Because, I was thinking to myself, they read something besides the Bible, but it was not the time for that conversation.  Even my young, inexperienced self knew that.

            But I had taken an “older” woman with me—she might have been 30—and after we left, she got all over me.  How could I possibly give marriage advice?  What was wrong with me?  How could I tell her to leave her husband (which I did not do and could never figure out where that accusation came from)?  All I did was read the Bible to her.  And that conversation led to more, some even more ticklish, like the time she asked me about something in their sexual relationship.  But she kept asking and I kept going, and we did eventually talk about the gospel.  All too soon we left that place, and as far as I know, no one from the church ever went to talk with that young woman again.  I planted the seed but no one bothered to water it because it was too “difficult” a situation.

            That was my first experience with difficult questions.  By difficult, I don’t meant theologically difficult.  I mean the intimate ones, the ones that deal with things seldom discussed—especially among Christian women.  All my life I have seen young women too afraid to ask those questions.  Too often they are ignored because no one wants to deal with them.  Other times they receive a hastily muttered response amounting to, “Oh, you’ll get over it,” or “It’ll go away if you leave it alone.”  And worst of all, because she admits she has a problem with anything involving sex and asks how to deal with it, she is told that if she were truly a Christian, she wouldn’t have such disgusting issues in her life.

            It’s long past time for that to stop.  If we older women truly want the younger women to come to us, we need to change how we receive them.  We need to act like their problems are real—because they are!—and nothing that isn’t common to others.  We need to be able to say those words we usually avoid because we are “ladies.”  In a society where sex imbues everything from automobiles to hamburgers, it’s time we faced the truth:  even Christian women have problems that maybe our own generation or the ones before it did not, not because we were better than they, but because our noses weren’t rubbed in it every day.

            It’s time we realized that Christian women can become addicted to pornography, as early as middle school.  It doesn’t make them any less a Christian than the one who is addicted to gossip.  Now deal with it, don’t sweep it under the rug and allow a floundering child to die in sin because we don’t want to face the facts.

            We need to be able to look teenage girls in the eye and say, “If he has ever laid a hand on you in anger, get away from him.  It will only get worse after marriage.”  Yes, I have seen “Christian” abusive husbands.  We need to give these girls a list of things to look for, and we need to give that list to the men to teach the boys how to avoid becoming those abusers.

            We need to talk about what does and does not constitute intercourse and more than that, teach the attitude that strives for purity, not just toeing the line as closely as possible so we can still call ourselves virgins.  My daddy used to say, “We keep putting the em-PHA-sis on the wrong syl-LAB-le, and look where it’s gotten us.”

            We need to talk about the place of the sexual relationship in marriage, not only its problems and pitfalls, but its glories too.  We need to tell our young people that God meant us to love the look of one another and not be ashamed of it.  We need to teach young women about the needs of their husbands in plain language they can understand.  We need to physically pull their heads out of the sand if they won’t do it themselves.

            But more than anything else, we must teach our young people that we are happy to talk about anything with them, even things that might feel uncomfortable to us.  And we need to hide that discomfort at all costs if we expect to form a relationship with those precious souls.  They need to know how important they are to us, and that their questions will be held in confidence.  They need to see this in us as we give them our full attention and really listen.  (Obviously, situations can arise where health and safety of both body and soul may require us to speak to someone in authority.  That should go without saying.)

            There will always be hard questions.  I have seen a few young people who seem to ask them just to see the reaction they might get.  Don’t give them any excuse to assume you are “just like all the other old people—fuddy-duddies who don’t really care anyway.”  Instead, surprise them and prove them wrong. 

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure…Titus 2:3-5
 
Dene Ward

I grew up with knickknacks around the house, with pretty centerpieces on the dining room table when we weren’t actually eating there, with paintings on the walls, and a coffee table adorned with crystal bowls, flower arrangements, and porcelain birds.  The first time I visited my in-laws I was almost shocked that I saw none of that anywhere.  Everything was strictly utilitarian.  Tables were for putting necessary items on and they were placed with the same thing in mind, whether the room looked balanced or not.  It’s not that my mother-in-law did not have a decorator’s eye; it was my father-in-law’s understanding of beauty.  If he asked the question, “What’s it good for?” and all you could say was, “To be pretty,” then it was useless in his eyes and did not deserve a place among his things.  It was simply “in the way.”  Over the years I suppose she just gave up, though to be fair, if a thing wasn’t a necessity, they had little money for it anyway.

            Yet I think that beauty does have a use.  Why else would God have made blossoms of every size and color?  Why make a bird called a painted indigo, a whole patchwork of brightly colored feathers that thrills me every time he perches on my feeder?  Why would he have made vistas that take your breath away, the Grand Canyon, the rolling green and blue or snow-capped mountain ranges, the tropical rainforests where flowers and birds and even creeping things seem to grow both larger and more vibrantly colored than anywhere else in the world?  Why, in fact, would we classify color blindness as a disorder if seeing beautiful colors is useless?

            But God did make us able to see beauty and appreciate it.  Where do people want to go when they are tired and troubled?  A place of order instead of chaos, a place of beauty instead of ugliness.  Beauty can calm the soul or it can stir the heart.  It can inspire.  It can bring joy.  It can also teach.  Just as eating baby food gradually enables us to eat solid food, learning to appreciate outer beauty can eventually lead us to an understanding of true beauty.

            God told Moses, And you shall make holy garments for Aaron your brother, for glory and for beauty. Exod 28:2  It mattered to God that the garments of the men who served Him be beautiful.  It mattered to Him that they understand that outward beauty was representative of something truly beautiful—the sacred and the holy.  One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple. Ps 27:4  Putting God’s priests in sackcloth would have been an affront to a beautiful God.

            And as we learn to appreciate the spiritual beauty of our God, so we must also learn to recognize the true beauty of people. 

            How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news, who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness, who publishes salvation, who says to Zion, “Your God reigns.” Isa 52:7  Feet must be the ugliest part of the human body, yet feet that take the gospel to others are “beautiful.”

            The glory of young men is their strength; And the beauty of old men is the hoary head. Prov 20:29  Gray hair is nothing to be ashamed of.  What it should represent is knowledge and wisdom, and the ability to help others along their path.

            Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you are like unto whited sepulchers, which outwardly appear beautiful, but inwardly are full of dead men's bones, and all uncleanness. Matt 23:27.  Inward beauty makes our service acceptable to God.

            When the Messiah came, few recognized him.  He did not look like the Savior they expected.  For he grew up before him like a young plant, and like a root out of dry ground; he had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him. Isa 53:2.  They had not learned the lessons of true beauty and missed out on the most beautiful thing of all, a Lord who sacrificed himself for our salvation.

            What are you missing in life?  A good marriage to a godly mate?  A church that teaches the truth of the Gospel?  Brethren who would love you more than family?  Have your learned to look beyond the outside and see the beauty within?  If not, then you have completely missed the lessons God has given us since He created this world and pronounced it “Very good.”  Beauty is useful, but only if you learn the lessons it teaches.
 
For great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised; he is to be feared above all gods. For all the gods of the peoples are worthless idols, but the LORD made the heavens. Splendor and majesty are before him; strength and beauty are in his sanctuary. Ps 96:4-6
 
Dene Ward