Every afternoon following our midday meal, we walk our property, counting new blooms on the roses, smelling the jasmine, and looking beneath those large scratchy leaves for new squash blossoms.  Usually I end up with a handful of wildflowers, blooms so tiny I cannot see them until Keith hands me one I can pull up close.
            Do you know what I see?  Blooms of all colors--red, pink, blue, white, yellow, orange, purple in all shades and combinations—and shapes—bells, tubes, bowls, cups, stars with five or six points, some flared, some rayed, some as complex as orchids.  And did you know that even the stems are different?  Some are wiry, some are leafless, some are hairy, some sprawl and others stand up straight, and some are square!  Some of these flowers are exquisite, but most of us don’t know that.  We’ve never taken the time to bend over and really look.
            A long time ago a woman who has since become a close friend, told me that looking across the pews at Keith had made her think he was stern and unapproachable, and so she had decided to make it a point to get to know him.  It wasn’t really Keith’s fault.  He has large, piercing blue eyes that look like they’re boring into you, a strong Roman nose, and a voice that, because he is profoundly deaf, is always in projection mode.  Even when he isn’t, he often sounds disapproving, and is always loud, which is often translated “angry.”  A lot of people just go with that first impression.  This woman did not, and she proclaimed that year of getting to know him “delightful.”   I wonder how many others have missed out on that delight, how many have formed an opinion, and kept it despite what others might have said.
            How many do we overlook?  The elderly because we think them dull and uninteresting?  The teenagers because we’ve branded them all shallow and naïve?  The disabled because we think they have nothing to offer?  The scholarly and intellectual because we think those dry old men can’t possibly know how to have any fun?  The ones who seem so well put-together that we think they wouldn’t possibly want anything to do with “someone like me?”  None of these judgments is fair.            
          Jesus told the Jews, “Judge not according to appearance, but judge righteous judgment,” John 7:24.  Maybe I should take the time (sacrifice) to bend over (be humble) and examine (make some effort) a few wildflowers out there, instead of passing over them (negligence) as if they weren’t worth my trouble (arrogance).  When I think of it that way, I finally understand why judging by appearance is NOT righteous.
 
But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.”  1Sam 16:7      
                          
Dene Ward

My little boys used to bring me bouquets all the time.  Sometimes it was Queen Anne’s lace.  Sometimes it was a bright blue spiderwort.  Sometimes it was a rain lily or a stem of pink clover.  Sometimes it was just a dandelion bloom.  All of these are wildflowers, what any suburban lawn grower would call “weeds.”  Yet I put them all in vases of various sizes because they were all precious to me.  My little fellows had no idea the difference between domesticated flowers and wildflowers.  All they knew was “flowers,” and out here in the country we are surrounded by them.
            But even they would never have gathered a bunch of them, ripped off the blooms and handed me a fistful of stems.  The problem with religion today, including some of my own brothers and sisters, is they value the stems and not the flowers. 
            A few months ago someone told me how listening to a certain teacher had made his day so much better.  I anxiously awaited the lesson he had heard, but he never once said a word about the content.  All I heard was the teacher’s name, at least three times, and how that person had made his day better.  What he had done was throw away the flower and put the empty stem in a vase of water to admire.
            I understand having favorite speakers and teachers.  Nothing makes me happier than to hear someone compliment my husband and my sons.  But none of them teach for the glory.  They teach to help people. If all people remember is their names, then they haven’t been much help, have they? 
            If I can’t tell you what a person taught me, did I learn anything, or was I just entertained for a few brief moments?  One of my favorite teachers isn’t much of an entertainer, but I always go away with a new way of looking at things, even things I have been looking at for decades now.  He makes me think, and he makes me see the possibilities.  He makes me want to go look at it again myself, and I often do.  He makes me examine my life in ways I never have and want to change for the better.  Can your favorite speaker do those things, or does he just make you laugh and feel good?
            There is absolutely nothing wrong with going to someone for help with your Bible study.  God did ordain the role of teachers in spiritual things (Eph 4:11).  He meant for us to have brothers and sisters we could go to with questions and problems.  Paul told Timothy to pass on what he knew to “faithful men.”  He told the older to train the younger.  But God also holds us individually accountable for what we do with what we hear.  “Work out your own salvation,” Paul told the Philippians, well after Jesus had already said, “If the blind lead the blind, they shall both fall into the ditch.”  It is up to each of us to be careful to whom we listen and to examine what they say against the Word (Acts 17:11).
            A good teacher doesn’t care if he receives praise or not—that is not his purpose.  All he does is hold up the Word of God and present it to you.  “What is the straw to the wheat?” God asks in Jer 23:28.  That word “straw” has several meanings according to Strong’s, and one of them is the wheat stalk, or stem.  Which is more important, God is saying, the stem or the wheat it holds up?
            I knew a man once who nearly tore a church up because he insisted on “his turn” to teach when not only was he a lousy teacher, he didn’t even know the Word of God accurately enough to teach it.  Clearly, it was all about the glory of teaching to him, and clearly he needed the admonition in Rom 12:3:  For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.
            I know the temptation.  So did Paul.  I refrain from [boasting], so that no one may think more of me than he sees in me or hears from me. So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited, 2 Cor 12:6,7.  It shouldn’t matter to me what people say about my speaking or writing.  What should matter is how many I reach, how many are helped and encouraged and how many souls are saved.  And that is what should matter to those who listen and read too. 
            And do you know why this is so important?  If you value the who above the what, then someday, sooner or later, you will be deceived into believing a lie.  Even good teachers make mistakes, and you might be deceived by an honest error too.  That is why James tells us in 3:1 that teachers will receive the “greater condemnation.”  Teaching is a responsibility, and anyone who craves the glory is manifestly unable to handle that burden.
            Most of the preachers and teachers I know will tell you the same things I am now.  If you want to make me happy, then use what I give you, remember it and grow.  Share it with others who might need it.  Even if you forget where you got it, just pass the good news along.  That is what really matters.  Give them a bouquet of flowers, not a handful of stems.
 
For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself, Gal 6:3.
 
Dene Ward
           

On April 9, 1939, African-American contralto Marian Anderson stood before a mixed race audience of 75,000 on the National Mall and sang a concert.  She had been banned by the Daughters of the American Revolution from singing that program in Constitution Hall, which they owned, when she was invited to sing there in a concert series for Howard University.  First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt was outraged and resigned her own membership in that group.
              NAACP executive secretary suggested the Mall, and because it is a national monument, Secretary of the Interior, Harold Ickes, did the planning and arranging.  The crowd stretched from the Lincoln Memorial to the Washington Monument.  Even though she could, and did, sing many Italian arias from the operas she sang across Europe, Miss Anderson's first song was "My Country Tis of Thee."  One wonders if the irony shook the ground as she sang the lyrics, "Let freedom ring."
              To Americans, liberty is almost a sacred word.  As Christians, we, too, have liberty, but we seem to have misplaced the emphasis.  Most of the verses that proclaim our freedoms are talking about freedom from sin and the liberty we have in Jesus.  What we often want to proclaim instead is the liberties to do certain right things no matter the consequences.  Can we just point out today that it is possible to do right things and still be wrong?
              Right things can become wrong when they are given too high a priority for their actual level of importance.  There are many things that are right to do, but when they keep us from doing things more necessary, when they allow us to excuse ourselves from duties God has given us, they become wrong.  When we use our work, for example, to excuse our serving, that right thing—making a living and providing for our families—has become wrong.
              Right things can become wrong when they are done from the wrong motivation.  How many times have you thought of "doing good to your enemies" as the ultimate revenge instead of the correct attitude of heart for a disciple of Christ?  But God commends his own love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. (Rom 5:8).
              Right things can become wrong when they will leave an obviously wrong impression.  This one can be abused by petty tyrants who want to micromanage everyone else's life according to their sensibilities, but when the babes (not the wolves) are involved, we must bend over backwards.  …but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all.  (Rom 12:17).
              Right things can become wrong when they cause others to sin.  Don't use that word "offend" because you will miss the point.  This isn't about someone who considers himself a strong Christian not liking what you are doing.  This is a babe who does not have the knowledge that he needs to understand difficult distinctions.  But take heed lest by any means this liberty of yours become a stumblingblock to the weak.  (1Cor 8:9).
              Right things can become wrong when they come between me and my service to God.  It is good to care for your physical temple.  It is not good to spend more time on that than you spend on serving God, or when something like obsessive dieting keeps you from spending time with brethren or fulfilling the sacred duty of hospitality.
              While the world may consider a Christian's life to be a life of chains, they do not understand the true liberties we have in Christ.  We are no longer in bondage to sin and Satan and the corruption of this world.  We can control ourselves and are not "mastered by anything."  But we must always remember to use those liberties wisely and compassionately, with tender regard to the weak and those we are trying to reach.  To do otherwise is to make a mockery of our freedom.
 
But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.  (Rom 6:22-23).
 
Dene Ward

Have you ever apologized to anyone?  Let me rephrase that.  Have you ever apologized in the Biblical way?  You mean there is a difference?  I think there is a huge one.
              The first two definitions of “apology” in my Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary are 1} a formal justification; a defense; and 2) an excuse.  The original word is Greek, apologia.  Paul used it in Acts 22:1 and 25:16 when he made his “defense” at his trials.  Understand this, in no way was he admitting wrong, and none of us would have expected him to.  He was in trouble for preaching the gospel.  He was defending himself, giving “a formal justification.”  That is not the kind of apology I am talking about either.
             Yet that is exactly the way most of us apologize—we defend ourselves.  We say, “I’m sorry you got hurt,” placing the fault on the other person, instead of “I’m sorry I hurt you.”  We say, “If I did anything wrong, I’m sorry,” as if to call in question the one we are “apologizing” to.  We give excuses for why we did what we did to make sure everyone knows “it wasn’t my fault.”  We do everything we can to avoid admitting wrong.
              Webster finally gives this as his last definition:  “An admission of error accompanied by regret.”  More to our point, this is the definition Jesus gives:  if he sin against you seven times in the day, and seven times turn again to you, saying, I repent; you shall forgive him.  Luke 17:4.  If he “turn again to you saying, I repent.”  No defense, no excuses, no justification, just “I was wrong.”  Have you ever apologized that way?
              I daresay most of us have not.  Yet that is exactly the way we are to apologize to God too.  Have you? Or do we, in our prayers, justify ourselves with phrases about being “only human,” or about “how hard it is, Lord,” or even “how mean he was to me first—you know he provoked me, Lord.”  What God expects from us is change for the better, Vine’s definition of the word.  That necessarily involves admission of guilt.  If not, why would we need to change?  And that is the same word Jesus used in Luke 17: 4.  “I repent,” plain and simple.
              So I ask you again, have you ever truly apologized in the Biblical sense, what Jesus called “repentance?”  The next time you begin with, “I’m sorry,” just stop after that second word.  Don’t allow yourself excuses or justification.  Just apologize.  You cannot correct error in your life without admitting it first, and once it’s been admitted, if you truly are a child of God, the responsibility to change cannot help but affect you.
 
God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble, James 4:6, 1 Peter 5:5.
 
Dene Ward
 

I entreat Euodia and I entreat Syntyche to agree in the Lord. Yes, I ask you also, true companion, help these women, who have labored side by side with me in the gospel together with Clement and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life.  (Phil 4:2-3).
 
              One of the saddest things about having been part of many different congregations in my lifetime is seeing people just like those two famous women above.  These were good women who had worked hard for the Lord, but for some reason they just could not get along.  We have seen it in every church and it is never takes long to figure out who the two parties are.  Once we were only at a place for a week-long gospel meeting and we still knew who they were well before the week was up.  That time it was two men, by the way.
              A lot of people may say that it doesn't really matter as long as they don't gather up parties on either side or cause a ruckus because, after all, the Bible doesn't say we have to like each other.  Yet the older I get and the more I study, the more I believe it does matter for one very simple reason.  Let me show you quickly this morning.
              Grab your Bible and look up Ephesians 2:11-22.  Christ came here with a mission.  The first one was making peace between God and man (Rom 5:1-3).  But he also came to make peace among men.  Look at verse 12 in this passage.  What was happening before Christ?  As Gentiles we were separate from Christ, alienated from the Jews, strangers from the covenant of promise, had no hope, and were without God.  Do you see all those words of separation and disunity?
              But now that we are in Christ we have been brought near, are one new man, are in one body of the reconciled, have access to the father, have become one nation and one family, and are built into one spiritual Temple (vv13-21).  Notice the difference in the words—nearness, access, oneness.  And why did that have to happen?  Because (v 22) God, who is a God of peace (Phil 4:9) cannot dwell in a Temple where there is no peace.
              When we think we can hang on to our little peeves and animosities and have it not affect the church, we are sadly mistaken.  It isn't just the Jew/Gentile or black/white problem, though they are bad enough.  It took Christ coming to fix that and make us one nation.  But we can still ruin the whole thing if an outsider can come in and see the disunity after just a few days, when one family fights another, when two men behave like children who want their way "or else," when two women avoid one another like the plague. 
When you just can't get along, and don't really even seem to care, you may as well hang a sign on the door that says, "God not wanted here."
 
I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, ​that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.  (John 17:20-21).
 
Dene Ward
 

Today's post is part 2 of the continuing series on Proverbs by Lucas Ward.

In the previous lessons we have learned that the pursuit of wisdom is important and ranks with all the Christian virtues as something a Christian should be looking to grow.  After all, “The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom, and whatever you get, get insight.” Prov. 4:7.  Of course, James tells us to pray for wisdom (1:5) and Solomon continues to urge us to seek it out:  “Get wisdom; get insight; do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth.” Prov. 4:5.  So, I should be actively seeking wisdom.  Ok, but how?  How do I gain in wisdom?  Let's see what Proverbs says about this.
[A word of warning, most of these Proverbs posts are very scripture heavy as I allow Solomon to teach us.  I add just enough to tie the passages together and make them real for our modern lives.]

Prov. 10:8  “The wise of heart will receive commandments, but a babbling fool will come to ruin.”
Prov. 10:14  “The wise lay up knowledge, but the mouth of a fool brings ruin near.”
Prov. 18:15  “An intelligent heart acquires knowledge, and the ear of the wise seeks knowledge.”
From these it seems that one basic characteristic of the wise is that they are willing to listen and learn from others.  They seek out new knowledge and store it up. 

Prov. 19:20  “Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future.”
A wise man is willing to listen and learn and here we are instructed to listen and accept instruction in order to be wise.  If I want to be wise I must be willing to listen to the teachings of those wiser than I, but I can't listen blankly.  This isn't daydreaming in class, but time spent thinking about the advice and instruction I've received. 

Prov. 2:1-5  "My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God."
 
Look at how Solomon describes the search for wisdom.  Receive, treasure up, make ear attentive, inclining heart, call out, raise voice, seek and search.  This is effort.  This is work.  This is dedication to achieving a goal.  Solomon continues his urgings:
Prov. 4:13  “Keep hold of instruction; do not let go; guard her, for she is your life.” 
Prov. 22:17  “Incline your ear, and hear the words of the wise, and apply your heart to my knowledge”
Prov. 23:12  “Apply your heart to instruction and your ear to words of knowledge.”
 
Don't just idly listen; keep hold of the instruction and don't let go.  Then, apply your heart to knowledge and instruction.  That word "apply" was a very old Hebrew word that had come to mean a lot of different things. Originally it just meant "go" or "come".  Every other meaning it subsequently acquired was action oriented.  So, when I apply my heart to teaching, I'm taking action with my heart regarding that teaching.  I'm changing myself to better fit the teaching and thereby acquire wisdom. 
 
Of course, this isn't always pleasant.  One of the greatest challenges to accepting the instruction of others is the notion that "I can figure it out by myself!"  I want to be self-sufficient and don't want to rely on anyone else.  Solomon makes quick work of that idea:
Prov. 14:12  “There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death.” 
Prov. 16:25  “There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death.” 
Prov. 28:26  “Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered.”
Notice that 14:12 and 16:25 are word for word copies.  Solomon (or rather the Holy Spirit through Solomon) thought that idea was so important he repeated it verbatim later in his book.  If I try to figure everything out for myself, I'll wind up dead.  Trusting in my own ideas proves me a fool.  Instead I should walk in wisdom, or the instruction I've been gathering.  This idea of needing others to help us learn and grow is found in the New Testament especially in Titus as the older women are told to teach the younger.  In Galatians 6 we are taught to help instruct those who have fallen away back in to the light.  No matter how gentle we are, some will always refuse to listen.  These are fools and will come to a bad end:
Prov. 15:12  “A scoffer does not like to be reproved; he will not go to the wise.” 
Prov. 9:7  “Whoever corrects a scoffer gets himself abuse, and he who reproves a wicked man incurs injury.”
Prov. 13:18  “Poverty and disgrace come to him who ignores instruction, but whoever heeds reproof is honored.”
Prov. 15:5  “A fool despises his father's instruction, but whoever heeds reproof is prudent.”
Prov. 29:1  “He who is often reproved, yet stiffens his neck, will suddenly be broken beyond healing.” 
 
Even the instruction of the wise is sometimes a bit painful:
Prov. 10:17  “Whoever heeds instruction is on the path to life, but he who rejects reproof leads others astray.”
The instruction heeded is also referred to as reproof.  To be reproved is to be chided, to be told you are wrong.  This is never fun, but the wise one listens and grows while the fool rejects it.
Prov. 12:1  “Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid.”
Prov. 15:31  "The ear that listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise.  Whoever ignores instruction despises himself, but he who listens to reproof gains intelligence."
Prov. 27:6  “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.”
Again and again, listening to reproof and loving discipline are part of growing wisdom.  The wise also knows that a true friend will wound you to make you better while your enemy flatters you enormously. 

So, I need to be willing to listen to instruction even when it hurts.  I need to think about, to apply myself to that teaching.  What other practical advice does Solomon give for obtaining wisdom?
First, choose your companions with care:
Prov. 14:7  “Leave the presence of a fool, for there you do not meet words of knowledge.” 
Prov. 13:20  “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”
Sometimes foolish people are fun to hang out with, but you will never learn much from them.  If you want to become wise, seek out those who are wise and spend as much time as possible with them. 
 
Second, and finally, seek out counselors:
Prov. 11:14  “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.”
Prov. 15:22  “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.”
Prov. 20:18  “Plans are established by counsel; by wise guidance wage war.”
Prov. 24:6  “for by wise guidance you can wage your war, and in abundance of counselors there is victory.”
Solomon, in preparing his son to be king, speaks of war, but the principle holds to any activity.  Do you want to start teaching Bible classes?  Find someone who has done it and discuss it with them.   Are you a new parent, unsure of what to do?  Look around and find several successful parents and get their advice.  Do you want to start a new business?  Write a novel?  Further your education?  Find counselors who know about those things and talk to them.  This wisdom isn't just related to our spiritual lives, but will help us be successful in all aspects of our lives.  But for it to work, we have to be willing to listen.
 
Prov. 4:10-13  "Hear, my son, and accept my words, that the years of your life may be many.  I have taught you the way of wisdom; I have led you in the paths of uprightness.  When you walk, your step will not be hampered, and if you run, you will not stumble.  Keep hold of instruction; do not let go; guard her, for she is your life." 
 
Lucas Ward

And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, (Eph 5:18-19).
              It had to have been a science class somewhere along the way in my education, maybe as early as fourth grade.  The teacher put a glass in front of us and asked us what was in it.
              "Nothing," we replied in unison, at which point she told us we were mistaken—it was full of air.  It took a while for some to catch on.  A glass is never empty, not even half-empty.  It is either full of some liquid or it is full of air or it contains some of both.  That was the beginning of our study of vacuums, leading to the old Bell jar demonstration.
              What is true for a glass, is true for us as well.  "Be filled with the Spirit," our passage above says, and we understand that if we do not fill ourselves with that, something much worse will worm its way inside us because, just as physical nature abhors a vacuum, so does spiritual nature.
              And so we need to know how to fill ourselves with the Spirit and all too often we stop with those two verses.  "By singing!" we exclaim when someone asks how it is done, and then laud our congregation for its Spirit-filled singing, as if that is all there is to it.  We sound great and those harmonies and rhythms stir our souls, making our hearts even beat faster, so that must be how to do it.  Wow!  Look at all the Spirit we have in this one room.
              Yes, that is indeed part of it.  But if we think that a good songfest will take care of the issue, we have shown ourselves to be poor readers of the Word.  That paragraph does not stop with "singing," and neither does that sentence.
              …giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, (Eph 5:20).
              How good am I at giving thanks, especially if I have had a particularly trying week?  How often does my thanks become complaining because my life has not gone the way I expected?  Because Ii got up on the wrong side of the bed?  Because someone cut me off in traffic?  How often do I resort to those words of self-pity, "Why me?"  when suffering comes my way?  Probably more often than I should, but still, being thankful is fairly easy to do when you have been steeped in the plan of God to save us from sin and the sacrifices He made to do it for your entire life.  So how about the final point in that sentence?
              …submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Eph 5:21).
              What?!  Yes, if I am filled with the Spirit, I am submitting to my brothers and sisters.  "Aye, there's the rub," we say along with Hamlet.  We are perfectly happy to sing and even to give thanks, especially when reminded every so often, but submission?  Now that IS a rub—a hindrance or impediment—to allowing the Spirit to fill us.  What exactly is meant by this (grumble, grumble) "submission?"
              Well, it is the same word as the next verse, Wives submit to your own husbands, as unto the Lord.  The answer is right there.  A man should submit to his brothers and sisters exactly as he expects his wife to submit to him, and even the manner is specified:  as unto the Lord.
              Whoa, now! 
              "I have my rights." 
              "I have liberties."
              "I have my opinions."
              "I am just as good as anyone else." 
              "No one can tell me what to do."
I have heard them all, not just once or twice, but too many times to count.  And what does that mean?  It means I have heard a lot of people who are filled with something besides the Spirit, probably themselves, because your heart abhors a vacuum just as much as nature does.
 
And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, [How?]
1.  addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart,
2.  giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,
3. submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Eph 5:18-21).
 
Dene Ward

One evening as we sat with our grandsons in the family room of their home, two year old Judah found three small bins, about the size of the largest coffee cans these days, and summarily emptied them one by one.  Small figurines, farm animals, blocks and other toys covered the family room floor.  He stood there looking around with obvious satisfaction, lifted his hands in the air and, with a big grin on his face, proclaimed, “I made a mess!”
              Then, surprising us both, he began to pick up each and every tiny toy and place them in the back of his dump truck, the big one he can sit on and push with his feet, until every toy was off the floor.
              “What a good boy!” I exclaimed.  Naively, as it turned out because he immediately knelt before the truck and began tossing the toys over his shoulders with both hands until once again they were scattered everywhere.  Again he looked on his work with satisfaction, then began picking them up and starting over.   This must have occurred five or six times before it began to bore him, but for a while there, “Making a Mess” was the game of the hour and he was quite good at it.
              Do you know any mess makers in the church?  You know, the ones who ask questions in class that are deliberately designed to foil the teacher’s carefully laid out lesson and confuse the newcomers; the ones who enjoy starting a discussion they know will end in arguments; the ones who delight in pulling people aside, especially teachers and preachers, and “setting them straight” about some detail that doesn’t even matter; the ones who pride themselves on taking the opposing view, not because it is the right one, but because they enjoy a stir.  They might as well stand in the middle of the room with my two year old grandson and proclaim, “I made a mess.”
              What does Paul say about them?  They “quarrel about words to no profit.”  They participate in “irreverent babble.”  They engage in “foolish and ignorant controversies.”  They have “an unhealthy craving for controversy”—indeed they can hardly control themselves when they see certain subjects coming up.  That lack of self-control comes because they are “depraved in mind.”  In short, these people thrive on making messes.  They live to cause trouble.  They even brag about their tendency to do these things. 
              And why is it so bad?  Their actions “subvert souls.”  They “lead people to more and more ungodliness.”  Their foolishness “eats like a gangrene.”  It “genders strife.”  It serves only to “produce envy, dissension, slander, suspicion…and constant friction.”  It troubles the new Christians and “unsettles minds.”
              At least my two year old grandson’s activity did not hurt anyone.  It was entirely appropriate for a child his age.  What excuse does a middle-aged mess-maker have?  He might as well go play with the babies.
 
But avoid foolish controversies, genealogies, dissensions, and quarrels about the law, for they are unprofitable and worthless. As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned.  Titus 3:9-11
(Passages quoted in the body of the article:  1 Tim 6:4,5; 2 Tim 2:14,16,23; Acts 15:25.)
 
Dene Ward
 

We were once again babysitting, this time in Tampa instead of here at home.  Though I grew up there, that Tampa was long ago and far, far away.  In fact, that night, a Wednesday, we headed for a place that forty years ago had been nothing but woods.  Now it is a Chick-Fil-A, "where we go every Wednesday before church," we were told by our grandsons, and since Mom and Dad had been away for a week and a half already with three more days to go—and not just away, but on another continent—we wanted things to be like "normal," so off to that popular place we went.
              Probably because I grew up in that area, even if it did look very different back then, my sense of direction was just fine when we came out after our meal.  For one thing, I knew that turning left onto Fowler without a light, especially during the remaining minutes of rush hour, was a no-go.
              "I wonder if there is a back way," I mused aloud.
              Eight year old Silas immediately piped up from the backseat.  "Turn right out of the back of the parking lot, go to the next street and turn right again."  Of course he gets his superb directional skills from his grandma!
              So I repeated his directions to Keith who could not possibly hear him from the front seat.  He looked a little askance, but did as he was told.  But then we came to 56th Street and by then, good old Granddad was totally turned around.  He had no idea where he really was.  I recognized immediately that though we needed to turn left, there was no break in the median there to do so.  We would have to turn right, go to the Fowler light, and do a U-turn in order to be headed in the correct direction.  And that light was not even a block down the street in the middle of the thick traffic.
              "Make sure you have enough room to get all the way across," I told him.  "You will have to make a U-turn at the light to get to church."
              "What are you talking about?  A U-turn?"
              "Yes, at the light."
              "I don't want to turn there.  It's the wrong place.
              "No, it isn't.  The church turn-off is behind us."
              "Are you sure?  It's just down a block or two on the left."
              "No!  You have to turn around.  You have to make a U-turn at the light."
              "But why do I want to do that?"  he asked, thoroughly flummoxed.
              Once again the 8 year old voice piped up from the backseat.  "Because that's how to get there," he said with simple logic.
              At that point I laughed out loud.  "Yes.  That's how to get there."
              "No it's not.  I shouldn't have to make a turn at all."
              "Yes, you do," and by then the car was in a bit of an uproar because he was starting to pull out and the traffic was way too heavy for him to get all the way across into the left turn lane before he hit the light.  "All the way, all the way, all the way!" the boys and I were shouting, and that is exactly what Keith did, having given up on his idea of where we were, though I think I still hear the echo of a horn and a screech of tires behind us as he did it.
              As we sat there in our hard-won left lane, waiting to make a U-turn, Keith said very quietly, "What street is this?" and when I told him he added, "Ohhhhh," with dawning realization.  "Well, it's a good thing someone knew where we were."
              And once again that little voice piped up from the backseat, "Always listen to the guy in the backseat."  Then glancing over at his little brother he added, "On the right."
              We have laughed at that story for a year and a half now.  "Always listen to the guy in the backseat," one of us says, and then in unison, "On the right!"  And the little guy had a point.  When you are lost, when you don't know what to do, when you don't know where to go or who to turn to, ask "the guy in the backseat."  In this case, that metaphor stands for someone who has been there, perhaps several times, as Silas had, someone who knows the ropes, someone who can lead you through the maze of possible routes safely to the other side.
              Too many times we go to the wrong people.  We go to the ignorant, the naïve, the ones who are in just as much trouble as we are.  We steadfastly refuse to approach anyone who can really help us.  And why?  Could it be because we know we won't like the answer we will get?  Could it be because it simply goes against the grain to let that particular person know we are having trouble?  Could it be because, "No one really understands what it's like."  Are we really that arrogant?
              God created the church in his "manifold wisdom" (Eph 3:10), first, to hold forth the light of the gospel and save the world.  But also so we can help one another, so we never have to fight the battles alone.  Look around you some Sunday morning.  You will see a group of people who, between them, have met almost every trial of life.  You have a wealth of information and help at your beck and call, not to mention a raft of prayers going up daily if you only ask for them.
              Sometimes your life is a crazy intersection at rush hour, with cars whizzing past and a left lane far across four lanes of that dangerous traffic, the very lane you need to be in to make a U-turn that might save your soul.  Listen to the guy in the backseat and quit trying to figure it out alone.
 
Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. (Gal 6:2).
Now we that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves. (Rom 15:1).
 
Dene Ward

Years ago I sang in the evening chorus at the university.  Chorus was required for my degree, and this was the only chorus that fit my schedule, a schedule that included teaching private piano lessons, running a home, and interning as a music teacher in a local elementary school.  Add to that, I was a preacher’s wife—just learning, as he was, but still dealing with extra obligations.
              We had a program scheduled and the director called an extra rehearsal.  That rehearsal did not fit my schedule.  I would have had to cancel a few lessons and more important, miss a Wednesday evening Bible study.  He made it clear that no misses would be excused short of death beds.  So I took a deep breath when I broached the lion in his den the next afternoon.
              My heart sank when I saw three others waiting outside his office.  Instead of calling us in one by one, he came out and stood in the hall and listened as the first one asked to be excused.  “Absolutely not!” he said sternly.  “You already miss too many rehearsals.  If you don’t show up, you will be dismissed from the chorus.”  The next one received a similar reply and the next.  They all left, crestfallen.
              Then he saw me at the back of the line.  “If you have to dismiss me, I understand,” I began, “but my husband is a preacher and we have a Bible study that night.  I just cannot miss it.” 
              I was shocked when a small smile twitched at his lips.  “You I don’t worry about,” he said quietly.  “You are always there.  You listen when I give directions.  You know your part.  You haven’t missed a single performance.  Go to your Bible study.  You still have a place in my chorus.” Talk about relief.  I drove home praising God in my heart.
              Have you read Psalm 123?  That psalm is classified as a psalm of trust, written on behalf of the entire nation of Israel.  Many psalms are full of hallelujahs, with shouts of Hosanna, with dancing and leaping and loud expressions of joy.  Not this one.  Psalm 123 is a quiet psalm.  It is presented as servants watching quietly from the corner of the room for the smallest sign from the master that he wants something. 
              Behold, as the eyes of servants look to the hand of their master, as the eyes of a maidservant to the hand of her mistress, so our eyes look to the LORD our God, till he has mercy upon us, v 2.
              Leupold says, “There is nothing powerful, moving or sublime that finds expression here.  A quiet, submissive tone prevails throughout.  It is subdued in character.”  This is simply a servant doing his master’s will in an unobtrusive manner, calmly asking for relief but going about his duty even in the midst of trial, trusting that his prayer will be answered without his further interference.
              I like this psalm.  I have never been one who needs to demonstrate my love for God loudly, yet everyone knows it is there simply from the way I live my life.  If my chorus director could know I was a “faithful student” despite the fact that I was quiet instead of boisterous, certainly God can know the same about my spiritual life.
              God, the Father of spirits, made all kinds of personalities.  And because He made them, he accepts them—just look at the apostles and all their differences.  If He will accept that varied crew, He will accept my worship, even if it is quiet and restrained, as long as my emotion and intent are sincere and obedient.
              Nowadays it seems people are quick to judge others as less thankful, less sincere, and less loving if they sit quietly and say little aloud about their feelings.  This psalm says it isn’t so.  If I sit quietly in the corner waiting for my master’s smallest cue, I may, in fact, be a whole lot more likely to see it than someone who can’t sit still long enough to notice, or be quiet long enough to hear someone besides himself.  
              We are all different, yet God accepts all worship that is “in spirit and in truth,” the brash, the boisterous, even the analytical and the subdued.  Perhaps our judgments of one another should be more subdued as well.
 
But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious, 1 Pet 3:4.
 
Dene Ward