Flight Paths

I grew up in Tampa.  I learned to drive down Busch Blvd when there were actually empty, weedy lots between Temple Terrace and Florida Avenue.  I drove on I-75 with a learner’s permit, what is now I-275, and even into downtown Tampa where my eye doctor had his office in a 20 story “skyscraper”—by Florida standards anyway.  I drove down 75 past Howard and Armenia to shop at the only mall in town, Westshore Plaza, in an era when sometimes you wouldn’t see more than 3 other cars on your side of the interstate.  Yes, it was a long, long time ago.
 
             I took Driver’s Ed at King High School.  They had a little driving course in the back of the school.  A two lane “street” painted on a parking lot with stop signs, yield signs, diagonal parking, and pylons for practicing parallel parking.  I could drive that course without a hitch and usually even managed to parallel park without crushing a pylon.

              But we never practiced U-turns.  So one day after I had passed my exam and had my own brand new driver’s license complete with the requisite peon-home-from-working-the-field picture, I was headed west on Busch Blvd and realized I had passed my turn-off.  Time for my first U-turn.  I pulled into the left lane and patiently waited for the traffic on the other side to clear.  It may have been years ago, but traffic was not kind that day.  Those cars were spaced just so that I had to wait far longer than if it were a normal left turn.  I knew I needed time to straighten out the car and get back up to 45 mph before any oncoming traffic reached me.

              Finally there was a break, just barely big enough for me to maneuver, if I hurried.  So I spun that wheel hard to the left and pulled out and hit the gas.  My little Mustang made it to the far right lane before completely turning, but almost immediately I was in trouble.  I had kept the wheel turned too long.  The tires screeched as I crossed back over all three lanes and was headed for the median.  Even though I needed to let go of the steering wheel I couldn’t.  I had thrown myself nearly into the passenger seat and was hanging on for dear life.  Thoroughly panicked, I finally let loose enough for the wheel to slide between my hands and allow the car to straighten.  I took my foot off the gas and shifted back into the seat just in time to miss the median and straighten myself out in the left lane.  No one and nothing was hurt but my pride.  I slunk in the seat as the oncoming traffic caught up and passed me, hoping no one I knew had seen that.

              That’s what a lack of experience will do for you.  I was old enough to drive.  But I had never performed that maneuver before, and had probably never paid enough attention to my parents as they did.  “It’s just a longer left turn,” I thought.  No, it’s a bit more than that.

              U-turns in life can be difficult too.  I have seen so many young people completely disillusioned because they thought making those U-turns after their baptism would be a cinch.  Now that I’ve turned my life over to God I won’t feel those temptations any more, they think.  I will suddenly be a changed person, able to live perfectly from here on in.  Once again a lack of experience is showing.

              We can be forgiven from our sins, but very often the consequences are still there to live with.  That can mean things as difficult as serving jail time or fighting addiction or dealing with people we have hurt physically or emotionally.  It can also mean the urges of a besetting sin.  You will still have to work on it.  You may need to change not just your life, but your schedule and your friends in order to see a difference.  The same things that tempted you before will continue to tempt you, and the Devil will try even harder because he thinks he might have lost you.  Why work on the ones who are securely under his belt?

              Tell your children these things.  Tell that neighbor you are trying to convert.  If they are not prepared for reality, they may lose hope.  But also tell them that now they will have help, help that can strengthen them enough to overcome anything—not necessarily easily, but certainly.  Help that understands what you are going through and will bear with you as you learn and grow with experience.  You may throw yourself across the highway the first time or two, but eventually you will learn to navigate the roads of life, and those U-turns will become easier to make. 

              And, if you have been “raised in the church,” you may find that the U-turns you need to make are of a completely different sort.  It is all too easy when you have never been involved in what we call “the big bad sins” to look down one’s nose on those who came from that background and judge them unworthy because they still struggle.  That is the U-turn you must make:  away from a judgmental attitude toward compassion, the same compassion Jesus showed for an adulterous woman, a thieving publican, and a convicted criminal.  Your U-turn may be the most difficult of all, but he still expects you to make it.
 
But [I] declared first to those in Damascus, then in Jerusalem and throughout all the region of Judea, and also to the Gentiles, that they should repent and turn to God, performing deeds in keeping with their repentance. Acts 26:20
 
Dene Ward

On February 23, 1942 a Japanese submarine surfaced off the coast of Southern California and fired 13 shells into the Bankline Refinery of Goleta.  This alarmed Americans, who had believed that World War II would not be fought on their home ground.  Blackouts were required in coastal cities, along with headlight shields on trains running the littoral rails.

            It also had a secondary effect.  The Forestry Service suddenly realized that, with all the able-bodied men away at war, fighting a forest fire, as was almost caused by the refinery’s proximity to Los Padres National Forest, would be next to impossible.  A campaign to stop preventable fires ultimately resulted in Smokey the Bear, a fictional mascot for the Forest Service. The first poster featuring this beloved symbol, drawn with ranger hat, belted blue jeans, and a shovel, reminding us that “Only You Can Prevent Forest Fires,” appeared on August 9, 1944, and he has been with us ever since.

            I wonder if we don’t need such a symbol to remind us of the spiritual fires we cause.  And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell, James 3:6.  I ran out of room writing down the sins caused by the tongue:  it breathes lie, it sows discord, it spreads slander, it teaches false doctrine, it tempts men to sin, it kindles strife, it destroys reputations, it splits churches—need I go on?

            So how do we prevent those fires?  By refusing to listen, by rebuking those who try to set them, by putting them out with a liberal dose of Truth.  I appeal to you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and create obstacles contrary to the doctrine that you have been taught; avoid them. For such persons do not serve our Lord Christ, but their own appetites, and by smooth talk and flattery they deceive the hearts of the naïve, Rom 16:17,18.

            Do you understand exactly how evil some of these sins are?  From the time of the Law of Moses, gossip has been associated with bearing false witness, a capital offense, Lev 19:16.  The Proverb writer tells us that God hates he who sows discord among brethren, Prov 6:19, something nearly impossible to do with anything other than words.  As for liars, their portion will be in the lake that burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death, Rev 21:8.

            Paul also makes it plain in passages like Romans 1:32 that God considers us as guilty as the ones who do those things when we “consent with those who practice them.”  It isn’t enough not to slander, not to lie, not to sow discord or spread false teaching.  We are not only not to listen but to actively rebuke as well--have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather even reprove them, Eph 5:11.  God expects us to prevent the fires that would ruin his people’s souls and the unity of his body.

            Maybe it’s time we borrowed Smokey the Bear and posted him around our meetinghouses and next to the telephones and computers in our homes.  Only we can prevent the fires set by a malicious tongue, whether it is ours or not.
 
 For lack of wood the fire goes out; and where there is no whisperer, contention ceases. As coals are to hot embers, and wood to fire, so is a contentious man to kindle strife, Prov 26:20,21.
 
Dene Ward

The kitchen must be the favorite room in nearly every home.  It’s where the family meets to share their meals and their day, to gather important information—“Mom! Where are my good jeans?”—to pick up sustenance when the time between meals is long and the activities vigorous, and a place for sharing thoughts, dreams, and childhood troubles over chocolate chip cookies and ice cold milk.  When the kitchen is full of people and laughter, all is right with the world.

            That makes the kitchen floor a microcosm of how we all live.  All you have to do is drop something small, something that requires your face to be an inch above the floor trying to spy the odd shape or color, and suddenly you know everything anyone has eaten, spilled, or tracked in, even if you clean your floor regularly.  If I had every dustpan full of sweepings over my 38 years of marriage, it would make a ten foot pile high of sugar granules, flour, cornmeal, panko, cookie crumbs, Cheerios, oats, blueberries, chopped parsley, basil, and rosemary, the papery skins of onions and garlic cloves, freshly ground coffee beans, tiny, stray low dose aspirins, grains of driveway sand, clumps of garden soil, yellow clay, limerock, soot, and burnt wood, strands of hair from blonde to nearly black to gray and white, frayed threads, missing buttons, assorted screws, and loose snips from the edges of coupons.  If I had never cleaned the floor at all, it would be layered with coffee drips, dried splashes of dishwater, bacon grease and olive oil splatter, tea stains, grape juice, and sticky spots from honey and molasses spills while I was baking.  Put it all together and you would have a pretty good idea how we live our lives.

            Every soul has a kitchen floor, places where the accumulated spills of life gather.  We must regularly clean that floor, just as I am constantly sweeping and wiping and mopping, trying to stay ahead of the messes we make. As soon as I miss a day or a week, I have even more to clean up.  It would be ridiculous to think I could ignore that floor and no one would know about us, wouldn’t it? 

            Jesus said, “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks,” Matt 12:34.  You can deny it all you want, but what you speak shows who you really are.  I can say I never bake, but whoever sweeps my floor will know better.  I can pretend we don’t like Italian cuisine, but the evidence is right there.  I can tell everyone we live in the city instead of the country, but the soil on my floor will say otherwise.  It is getting harder for me to see those things now and to sweep them up perfectly, but my blindness to them will not keep others from knowing exactly what I do here all day long.

            That kitchen floor of a heart will tell on you too.  All you have to do is open your mouth.  If you don’t keep it cleaned up, if you don’t monitor the things you store in it, it could belie your protestations of a righteous life.  Sooner or later a word will slip out, a thought will take root and become a spoken idea.  I heard someone say once that you cannot imagine in others what is not already in your own heart. 

            Of course, what’s on your floor could prove your righteous life instead of denying it.  So take a moment today to examine your kitchen floor.  Let it remind you to examine your heart as well.  I had much rather people see sugar and cookie crumbs than Satan’s muddy footprints.
 
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer, Psa 19:14.    
      
Dene Ward

I am certain that every Bible class teacher in the whole world has had this happen to them.  You reach a subject that you know applies to one or more people in your audience personally.  You know they need to hear this.  So you carefully lay it out in a way that cannot be missed or denied.

            Say you are teaching the story of Lydia and you reach that passage that seems innocuous, yet is anything but. 

            And after she was baptized, and her household as well, she urged us, saying, "If you have judged me to be faithful to the Lord, come to my house and stay." And she prevailed upon us, Acts 16:15.

            You know there is someone who regularly calls the preacher, deacons, and elders and tells them what they need, expecting everyone to be at their beck and call, or who takes them to task for not doing as much as she thinks they should (as if she were the only qualified judge of such things).  Meanwhile, this same person has yet to ever offer service to anyone else in the congregation.  Instead she judges the entire congregation on how well she is served. 

            So you make the point clearly:  Even a new Christian like Lydia, a brand new babe in Christ, could tell that her own faithfulness to the Lord was based on how often she served others, not on how often she was served by others.  And why shouldn’t it be, when the Lord she claimed to be serving was a servant himself?

            You hope to see the dawning light, and perhaps downcast eyes as that student realizes her error.  But no, there she is nodding vigorously, perhaps even saying, “Exactly!”  Your heart sinks because you know your efforts were in vain.  Instead of examining herself, she is still examining the church.  She is thinking, “Those people needed this, because they don’t serve like they should.”

            It doesn’t matter the subject.  It probably happens in every class and with every sermon in every church.  Meanwhile, the folks who knock themselves out trying to be what the Lord expects them to be sit there wondering, “Do I do enough?”

            So here is the thought for this morning.  Stop judging everyone else.  Think about yourself, for this is one area where it is not only allowed to be a little egocentric, but required.  Don’t say, “They needed that.”  Instead, say, “I needed that.  Now how can I get better?” 

            Whatever the subject, even if you think it has absolutely nothing to do with you or your life, think about yourself.  It is not my business to fix everyone else; it is only my business to fix myself.  It is not my business to decide what everyone else needs to do; it is only my business to realize what I need to do.  I must constantly ask myself, Did I need that?  I know I did, somehow, even if it is not yet obvious to me.  That only means I need to look harder. 

            Every lesson I hear, every sermon I listen to, should have me thinking, “How can I use this to become a better disciple of my Lord?”
 
They began to be sorrowful and to say to him one after another, "Is it I?"  Mark 14:19.
 
Dene Ward

I did not watch any television to speak of for about twenty years.  A few football games here and there, and a couple of educational shows while the children were small meant that I knew more Sesame Street characters than characters on any of the popular series.   I suppose the last shows I remembered well before then were the original Star Trek, Mission: Impossible, and Hawaii Five-O.

            A few years ago I turned on some show—I don’t even remember what is was—and I nearly went crazy.  The scene shifted every thirty seconds.  You no longer had dialogue that built dramatic tension over a five minute time span.  Instead you had 15 seconds of verbal staccato followed by an explosion or a gunfight or a chase scene.  They tell me this is all because of the video game generation—people who cannot sit still longer than a minute at a time without some sort of excitement to keep the adrenaline pumping.  Maybe I am an old fogy, but it seems to me that instead of accommodating all of this, we should be teaching people how to overcome it. 

            The problem with short attention spans is that you do not listen long enough to get below the subject’s surface.  God spent 1500 years writing a book that you cannot read and understand in fifteen second bursts.  He has already accommodated us with an incredible sacrifice.  Seems to me we could learn to accommodate him and the way he communicates with us.

            Parents, have you even thought about helping your children develop a longer attention span and a desire for greater depth in their studies?  Instead of saying, “He just can’t sit still,” how about saying, “Sit still!”  Instead of saying, “I can’t get them to listen,” say, “Listen!  This is important!”  Or don’t we believe it is? 

            Yes, I know all about ADHD.  I have a son who has it.  The doctor said that the reason he was so well-behaved and did so well in school in spite of it was because he had a verbal, educated family that believed in loving discipline.  Was it easy? No, but no one ever said parenting was supposed to be.  It takes patience and diligence—a long parental attention span!

            It isn’t merely my idea of what does and does not constitute good behavior.  I worry about children who cannot sit still long enough to learn a Bible lesson and the accompanying applications to their lives; who cannot concentrate long enough to memorize a verse that might help them in a tempting moment; who actually think the world revolves around them and needs to run on their frenetic schedule with a lot of excitement or it isn’t worth their notice.  Keith has a lot of them sit across the desk from him in the prison—they usually have manacles on.

            How do you think Moses managed 40 days of taking dictation from God on Mt. Sinai?  How did Joshua abide the boredom of marching around Jericho everyday for six days, much less seven times on the seventh?  How could Paul have fasted and prayed for three days straight without needing to get up and run around for awhile?  How could those early churches sit and listen to an entire epistle being read to them at one sitting, and actually make heads or tails of it?  How in the world did Noah spend 120 years building a giant box no one had ever seen before and couldn’t imagine the need for?  Would any of this generation be able to?

            Prayer requires long quiet moments with God.  Meditation requires thoughtful time with the word of God.  Commitment requires a lifetime of doing what needs to be done even when it is tedious and you don’t want to do it.  Help your children learn those things.  Don’t give in to yet another method for Satan to steal them away from us.
 
So Ezra the priest brought the Law before the assembly, both men and women and all who could understand what they heard, on the first day of the seventh month. And he read from it facing the square before the Water Gate from early morning until midday, in the presence of the men and the women and those who could understand. And the ears of all the people were attentive to the Book of the Law. Neh 8:2,3.                        
 
Dene Ward

I walked into the kitchen and stopped, looking around at the counters, the stove top, the sink, the pantry. 

              Keith came in behind me and asked, “What are you looking for?”

              “I don’t know,” I said. “I can’t remember,” and nothing lying around in plain view had jogged that memory, one that couldn’t have been over a minute old.  I have finally reached that stage when my memory is as fragile as my old lady bones.

              My short term memory, that is.  My memories of childhood, school, early marriage, and raising kids are firmly intact, and so are the memory verses I learned decades ago as a child.

              For a while there, memory verses seemed to be out of style.  I even heard a sister in Christ say their value was “overrated.”  She was even older than I.  I wonder how she feels now, especially during long nights when she can’t sleep, as happens so often to the elderly.

              Those memorized verses are invaluable to me.  They instantly spring to mind when I await another scary test result (“casting all your cares on him because he cares for you” 1 Pet 5:7); when the aches and pains of old age slow you down and you can no longer do what you have always done (“For this perishable body must put on the imperishable” 1 Cor 15:53); when friends and family pass on before you leaving a hole no one else can fill (“That you may not grieve as those who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep” 1 Thes 4:13,14); when you suddenly realize you’ve reached an age where anything could happen any time (“Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord” Rev 14:13).

              All my life during times of temptation, suffering, and betrayal, but also joy, hope and thanksgiving, those passages memorized so long ago have kept me going.  They’ve helped me answer a skeptic, refute false teaching, encourage a suffering friend, and edify my sisters in Christ.  Those words etched on the hearts of your children are anything but overrated.  Fill them up now, and while you’re at it, fill yourself up before your memory, too, becomes as fragile as your bones.
 
“You shall therefore lay up these words of mine in your heart and in your soul, and you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall teach them to your children, talking of them when you are sitting in your house, and when you are walking by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates, Deut 11:18-20
Dene Ward

I know—if you are not a musician you don’t know what I am talking about, but it really is 101—basic and easy.

            “Diatonic” means “two tones.”  A diatonic scale is made up of two kinds of tones—whole tones and semitones, or more commonly, whole steps and half steps.  As Occidentals, the diatonic scale is the most pleasing tone to our ear.  Try using a scale of only whole steps and it will set your teeth on edge.  My students used to call it “outer space music.”  Try making music with a half step scale and it will sound like you’ve let a hive of bumblebees loose in the room.  The point is, it takes two kinds of steps to make pleasant music.

            As humans we have a tendency to see “two kinds” in practically every situation and to do our best to make it NOT work.  In the early church when everyone was Jewish, they still managed to make a distinction between Jews born in Palestine and those born elsewhere (Acts 6).  Once Gentiles were converted, the distinction was circumcision (Acts 15).  If that weren’t enough, the bias became wealth (James 2), and then the full blown heresy of Gnosticism (1 John)—those who “knew” things others did not.

            “You’re not like us so you don’t belong,” was the attitude.  “Change or leave,” was often unspoken but surely intended, and if change was not possible, then leaving was the obvious “choice.”

            Paul spent several chapters in several epistles reminding us that while we are to repent (change) from a life of sin, no other change was required.  In fact, our differences make us a stronger, better body.

            But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. If all were a single member, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, yet one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you," nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you."…But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. 1 Cor 12:18-21,24,25.

            What I cannot do, maybe you can.  What you can’t, maybe I or someone else can.  Every ability is important and thus every person.  In fact, we have a tendency to judge differently than God does in that area.  As we have noted before, it was a woman who sewed for the poor whom Peter raised from the dead (Act 9), not the martyred preacher deacon (Acts 7) or apostle and cousin of the Lord (Acts 12).

            God expects us to live together, love together, and work together in harmony.  Rich and poor, Jew and Gentile, black and white, we are to make beautiful diatonic music together, not segregate ourselves into uniform groups that can only make weird sounds, sounds only fit for aliens, and not for the friends and neighbors we hope to save.
 
For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus, Gal 3:27,28.
 
Dene Ward

Today's post is by guest writer Lucas Ward.

Ty Cobb is my favorite historical baseball player. Reading the new biography of him by Charles Leerhsen, Ty Cobb: A Terrible Beauty, has confirmed this. When he retired from baseball, Cobb held ninety (90!) Major League records. When we think of him today, we primarily think of his hitting with good reason, as he still holds the career record for batting average at .366, the record for consecutive league batting titles at nine, and the record for most consecutive seasons batting at least .300 at an amazing 23. There have been over 100,000 men who have played baseball in the Major Leagues since 1900 but only two, Peter Rose and Ty Cobb, have over 4,000 hits.

So, Cobb was a great contact hitter, but what he was most known for in his day (1905-1928) was his base running. He not only set the record for most stolen bases, he also routinely kept running when all others would have stopped, makings singles into doubles and doubles into triples. He would tag up and take the next base on in-field popups and steal when the fielder threw the ball back to the pitcher. Jackie Robinson became famous partly for stealing home plate. He did it 19 times in his career. Cobb took home 54 times. My favorite Cobb story involves an inside-the-park home run that never left the infield. There was a man on third when Cobb hit a little dribbler. The runner assumed that the fielders would throw to first and tried to take home. Unfortunately for him, they threw to the catcher at home and caught him in a run-down. While he was darting back and forth between home and third with most of the other team chasing after him, no one notices that Cobb has kept rounding the bases. As they finally tagged the runner out near third base, Cobb was just passing third and headed for home. The opposing team was so agape at his chutzpah that no one thought to throw to home, and Cobb scored. You never knew what he was going to do, which was part of his plan. He intentionally tried to get into the heads of the opposing team. It has been said that if they kept records on causing poor, panicked throws Cobb would own that record too. In fact, a contemporary catcher, Ray Schalk, said “When Cobb is on first base and he breaks for second, the best thing you can do, really, is to throw to third.” When Cobb, who played for the Detroit Tigers, was roaming the bases, the other team needed to pay attention or he’d make them look silly.

So, Cobb was a Tiger prowling the bases trying to disrupt the other team. Please tell me you are already turning your Bibles to 1 Peter 5. 1 Pet. 5:8-9 “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.” Like Cobb, Satan is roaming around trying to get us. Like the opposing baseball team, we are never sure exactly what Satan will throw at us next and we have to keep watch constantly. Unlike Cobb, who was trying to destroy confidence and win a baseball game, Satan’s is trying to destroy our souls and send us to Hell. We must be watchful. We must be aware. Satan’s “batting average” is unfortunately high. We are promised, however, that we can resist him. If we do, he will flee (James 4:7). That’s something Ty Cobb never did.

Lucas Ward

Today is a day for lovers, or so the merchandisers of the world say.  Do Keith and I do anything special?  You better believe it.  It’s usually nothing huge—a card, a homemade gift, a bouquet of handpicked wildflowers, a special dessert.  We don’t try to single-handedly support Madison Avenue.  Sometimes Keith simply takes the day off and we spend time together talking—what a novel idea, especially for some married folks!  Not because we celebrate some Catholic “saint” or because we feel pressured by society, but because we take every opportunity to revel in our love.  How do you think we have managed to put up with each other for all these years?

            Romance is not an un-Biblical concept.  While the description of the body in several passages in the Song of Solomon may not appeal to our Western ears, it is still used in the courtship rituals of some Eastern countries today.  The Proverb writer speaks of romance like this: There are three things which are too wonderful for me, yes, four which I do not understand:  the way of an eagle in the air, the way of a serpent upon a rock, the way of a ship in the middle of the sea, and the way of a man with a maid, 30:18-20. 

            The writer of Ecclesiastes tells us to live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your life of vanity, which he has given you under the sun…for that is your portion in life, 9:9.  “Live joyfully” is an injunction; it is not passive.  Do not wait for it; initiate it yourself.  These passages were originally spoken to couples whose marriages were arranged.  Imagine what God expects of those of us who chose our own spouses after “falling in love.” 

            Two or three times a week as I clean out Keith’s lunchbox in the evening, I find red, heart-shaped love notes he has cut out of some office scrap paper and written—I know he has taken time out of a busy day to think of me.  And he usually calls during his lunch hour.

            Eating a nice dinner out is in our budget only a couple of times a year—and that is up from the early days of our marriage--but I can make a four course meal for two for the price of one entrée in an upscale restaurant, and enjoy doing it. Several times a year, we dress up, get out the china, light the candles, and have a meal I have worked on all day.  When the boys were little, I fixed them their own special meal—more along the lines of pizza than boeuf bourguignon--then explained how they could help mommy and daddy have a special time together by going to bed early, and staying there.  Besides the reward of their favorite meal, they could stay up late reading and talking to one another.  We occasionally heard thumps and giggles long after we would have ordinarily put a stop to it, but never once did they not fulfill their part of the bargain by interrupting us because we stressed to them how important their part was and they were thrilled to do it. 

            Marriage is a high maintenance relationship.  If you neglect it, it goes downhill in a hurry.  Do something today, no matter how small it may be—and whether or not the other one reciprocates--to keep that from happening.  Make sure it is something that will mean something to your spouse, not just to you!  Men and women are different that way (as if you hadn’t noticed).  Then choose another time to do it again—not just your anniversary or Valentine’s Day.  Do it sometimes for no good reason at all. Or isn’t keeping your marriage alive reason enough? 

            God expects you to romance one another.
 
Drink waters out of your own cistern, and running waters out of your own well.  Should your springs be dispersed abroad, and streams of water in the streets?  Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you.  Let your fountain be blessed and rejoice in the wife of your youth.  As a loving hind and a pleasant doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times, and be ravished always with her love.  Prov 5:15-20   
 
Dene Ward

I started teaching women’s classes far too long ago.  I was too young to have any idea either what I was doing or even what I was supposed to be doing.  But at the first place Keith preached—it was a part-time position under the oversight of elders—one of those elders asked me to teach the teenage girls.  I was only 20, but he said no one else would do it.  Then at the next congregation the ladies elected me the first night I attended the class that was already in existence.  Even though there were women forty years older than I, they thought that being “the preacher’s wife” made me automatically qualified.  I, who should have been sitting at the feet of older women, was frantically learning as I went.  I cringe sometimes wondering how many women I confused or misled with my inexperience and lack of wisdom.

              I hope I have improved.  I certainly have age and experience now, but the wisdom is an open question—always.  One thing about the age factor:  I have heard every excuse there is for not attending the women’s Bible study.  Are there truly valid reasons?  Yes, of course there are.  But there are far more of the other kind.  Let’s examine a few.

              “It’s so difficult to pay attention with the little ones in tow, and it’s so embarrassing when they cause distractions.”  Yes, it is difficult, but there is no need to be embarrassed.  Nearly thirty years ago when my current Tuesday morning class started up, we all had children still at home.  We made comments over the heads of playing toddlers and it was not uncommon that a few mothers would occasionally have to throw down their books and Bibles and run comfort a crying baby or settle a small-fry squabble.  We were all in the same boat and understood, but we never let our children be the excuse we gave the Lord for not finding time to get together and study.

              “But these lessons are so hard and take so long to do.”  I am afraid my lessons do tend to be this way.  But really now, what kind of hours would you expect to put in if you went back to school either to improve your job (vocation) or to get a promotion?  This is your spiritual education we’re talking about, and what you know will make a difference in how you conduct yourself in your spiritual vocation (Eph 4:1; 2 Pet 1:10) 

           A long time ago a brother went to the elders about one of Keith’s classes.  “It’s too deep,” he complained.  Those good shepherds were wise enough and strong enough to tell that brother what he needed to hear instead of what he wanted to hear.  “If I had been a Christian for forty years like you have,” they said, “I would be ashamed to say something in the Bible was too deep for me.”  Are you aware of Jesus’ statement when the apostles asked him why he spoke in parables, making it harder for people to understand?  Because the ones who care enough will work hard enough to understand it, he told them.  Do you care that much?

           I don’t make my lessons hard on purpose.  They seem difficult because the material is new to you.  I am trying to teach things you do not know, not rehash the things you do know.  That really would be superfluous and not worth a busy woman’s time.  Isn’t gaining a deeper knowledge and understanding of the Word of God worth rearranging your schedule, both in time to study and time to attend?  Can’t you give up something in order to study—like a TV show in the evenings?

           “Well they are so hard I don’t even know what to write down in the blanks.”  Ask anyone in the class how I run it.  Despite the reputation I must surely have for being a mean old lady who likes to mortify people, I never put anyone on the spot.  If you don’t know the answer, leave it blank.  But how will you ever find the answer if you don’t come and listen for it?  A good percentage of the class does exactly that, and one even laughs about how much erasing she has to do.  Now that’s a great attitude.  Can’t you follow her example?

           “My schedule is just so full.”  So is mine.  So is everyone’s.  The difference between those women and the ones who do not come (but could) is priorities.  They decided to make the time in their schedules for a Bible class.  They schedule things around it instead of the other way around.  They have trained their families to know, “Oh! It’s Tuesday,” or “the third Sunday,” and it really wasn’t that hard to do when they insisted on it.  And let’s just put this out there in black and white, plain and simple:  if you are too busy to study the Bible, you are too busy, and yes, maybe even sinfully busy if it causes you to neglect your Lord and His Word.

           “Once I get older and have less to do, then I will start attending ladies’ Bible class.”  Wait a minute!  Who are the older women told to teach?  Not the older ones who “have less to do” but the younger ones, that’s who!  The things we older teachers have to tell you will actually help you during your younger years.  If you listen and use these things, you might just avoid the problems that so many of your friends have.   What good will it do you when you finally come to class and all you have to offer are the things you have learned not to do from hard experience instead of wise teaching?  All my “old faithfuls” began young.  The vast majority have stayed with it—that’s why the class looks like a bunch of older women, not because they are the only ones who have time. 

           Many of the ones we have lost have moved to other areas.  I regularly hear from them how much they miss a class where they actually learn something new.  “We don’t have deep classes like this,” a visitor to our class once told me.  But here it is free for the taking to anyone who cares enough—and so few do. 

           I know I am not some popular, funny, good-looking teacher.  I know my lessons stomp on toes because I make applications that are real to life instead of feel good fluff.  The truly good teachers I know do the same.  We want to help you.  We want to share with you what we have worked hard to obtain, what means the world to us and should mean the world to you. 

           We also want to find young women who can take our places someday.  You simply must start early if you ever hope to do that.  I was 21 when I began serious, deep Bible study, and there is still so much left for me to learn and to share.  You could carry it on if you prepare yourself, but I can only give it if you are there to take it.
 
Older women likewise…are to teach what is good and to train the young women…Titus 2:3,4
And what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful [women] who will be able to teach others also. 2Tim 2:2
 
Dene Ward