Flight Paths

A few years ago I went on a trip and, as I was packing, I pulled out my favorite earrings and put them in a plastic bag to take with me.  What I did with them after that I have still yet to recall.  When I arrived at my destination, they were nowhere in my suitcase or my purse.  After returning home, I checked my drawers, my closets, my suitcases—even bags I did not take with me—plus my jewelry box, and the trash can.  I thought to myself, I must have had my mind somewhere else and put them in a strange place—like the times I put the milk in the pantry and the peanut butter in the refrigerator—but they will turn up sooner or later.  Those earrings have yet to reappear.        
            Funny how we have such a hard time remembering things we really want to remember but cannot forget those things we ought to forget.  Forgiveness is a tricky thing.  While I suppose a hurt is impossible to actually forget, forgiveness means we don’t continue to dwell on the past, keeping account of wrongs done us by various ones like a bookkeeper with OCD.  Yet that is exactly what the Lord expects of us.
            When he told Peter his disciples should forgive unto “seventy-times seven” it was a hyperbole, an exaggeration for emphasis.  No matter how many times a brother hurts me, I am to forgive.  That large a number also emphasizes that I am to do my best to forget.  How else could you forgive someone 490 times unless you have forgotten the previous 489?  The Lord knew what He was asking of us—continual forgiveness for a brother, even for the same sin, as many times as it takes.  He certainly understands the difficulty in that little proposition because He does it for us far more times than that.  If we choose a number to stop at, He will too.  He has probably already passed 490 with us.           
           Wouldn’t it be great if we could forget as easily as we can forget where we put the car keys, or our glasses, or the reason we went into the bedroom to begin with?  We forget those things because we so often have our minds on something else and get sidetracked.  Do you suppose that might work for forgiving others too?    
 
Put on therefore, as God's elect, holy and beloved, a heart of compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, longsuffering; forbearing one another, and forgiving each other, if any man has a complaint against any; even as the Lord forgave you, so also do ye: and above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfectness.
Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense, Col 3:12-14; Prov 19:11.
 
Dene Ward

I bought groceries the other day, and as I wandered down the produce aisle, I went past a cart in which the worker had stacked a pile of lettuce heads that were obviously past their prime, rusting and wilted.  Meanwhile, the line in front of the bagged salads stretched halfway across the produce section.  I was headed that way myself—only because they are on sale and I have a coupon, I salved my frugal conscience, certainly not because they are easier.
            As I waited my turn, I eased my way past containers of pre-chopped peppers, onions, celery, and garlic.  I had seen tubs of already mashed potatoes earlier, and when I scoured the freezer section for shrimp to cook in my bouillabaisse, I had to dig to find some that were not peeled, deveined, and pre-cooked.  Everyone wants the easy way these days.  Even the last few years I taught piano, it was not unusual for a parent to ask.  “How long will it take for my child to learn how to do this?”  After 45 years I was still learning!  No wonder you hear so much about easy-lose diets, an easy way to a toned body, and easy-read Bibles. 
           When I was a child, older folks often said, “It’s only worth the effort it cost you.”  God never says being His child will be easy.  Even when Jesus says, “My yoke is easy and my burden is light,” He is talking in relative terms—it is still a yoke and a burden.  But, unlike sin’s, His yoke and burden do not come with the built-in weight of guilt, an overriding, insurmountable millstone that will crush your spirit long before it destroys your soul for an eternity.  Paul says we will be a servant to something, either to sin unto death or obedience unto righteousness…But now being made free from sin and become servants to God, you have your fruit unto sanctification, and the end eternal life., Rom 6:16, 22.  Unlike the fatal weight of sin, this yoke and burden we can “live” with!
            The next time I want a salad, I will try to think about that, and buy the whole head, then relax and enjoy the chopping.
 
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity and cleanse me thoroughly from my sin…Purge me with hyssop and I shall be clean; wash me and I shall be whiter than snow.  Make me to hear joy and gladness...Restore unto me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with your free spirit…Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, Oh Jehovah, the God of my salvation, and my tongue shall sing aloud of your righteousness.  Selected lines from the 51st Psalm.
 
Dene Ward

"You are not what we need right now."
            I wonder how many times people have heard that as they were turned down for a job.  I suppose it might be the nicest way to reject an applicant.  The unfortunate thing is that many preachers have heard similar comments, usually when they are asked to leave.  I can't help but think of the prophet Amos.
            For some reason God chose that old country boy, a shepherd and farmer (Amos 1:1; 7:14) who came from the sticks of the Southern kingdom to preach to the more sophisticated social elite of the Northern kingdom.  Just imagine sending an Arkansas hillbilly to preach to people in New York City and you have the picture.  Our first reaction might be, "What in the world was God thinking?"  The people of Israel, and Amos himself, wondered about that. 
            And Amaziah said to Amos, O seer, go, flee away to the land of Judah, and eat bread there, and prophesy there, but never again prophesy at Bethel, for it is the king's sanctuary, and it is a temple of the kingdom. Then Amos answered and said to Amaziah, I was no prophet, nor a prophet's son, but I was a herdsman and a dresser of sycamore figs. But the LORD took me from following the flock, and the LORD said to me, Go, prophesy to my people Israel (Amos 7:12-15).  We don't want you, he was told.  And Amos as much as answered, "Hey!  This wasn't my idea!"  But Amos obeyed God and preached what he was told to preach.
            What most of us want in a preacher is a Hosea, the one we call the prophet of lovingkindness.  We want someone to pat us on the back and tell us that everything will be all right as long as we have sincere hearts and try real hard to be good.  The truth is that Hosea is more the exception than the rule when it comes to God's prophets.  The rest of them never mince words and tell it like it is no matter who doesn't want to hear it.  Why do you think so many wound up sitting in prison, running for their lives, or being martyred?
            What we must understand is that we do not always, maybe even seldom, know exactly what we need.  It may very well be that what I need is a good swift kick in the rear to wake me up from self-delusion about my spiritual state.  Do I want that?  Of course not.  I doubt if anyone does, but I will be much happier in the end if I get what I need instead of what I want.
            Be careful about thinking you know exactly what you need spiritually.  People who are watching you may have another viewpoint altogether.  Remember that when an Amos approaches and be ready to thank him.
 
And he said to me, Son of man, I send you to the people of Israel, to nations of rebels, who have rebelled against me. They and their fathers have transgressed against me to this very day. The descendants also are impudent and stubborn: I send you to them, and you shall say to them, Thus says the Lord GOD. And whether they hear or refuse to hear (for they are a rebellious house) they will know that a prophet has been among them (Ezek 2:3-5).
 
Dene Ward
 

“Those winter squash vines have grown a foot since that rain two days ago,” Keith mentioned as we drove into town one Tuesday morning.  “You can tell because the new growth is a different shade of green.”
            Indeed it is, I thought.  When spring comes, the new growth on the live oaks is a brighter shade I like to call “spring green.”  Even new growth on the roses is a different shade—a deep red.  New growth in plants is obvious.
            The New Testament is far too full of agricultural comparisons for me to pass this one by.  We are told ten times in the epistles to “grow” (auxano).  I may not be a Greek scholar, but I can run a program or look in a good, old-fashioned concordance for the same Greek word and where and how it’s used.  My question today is this:  is it just as obvious when we have new growth?  It ought to be.  So what will people see when I “grow” in this manner?
            2 Cor 9:10 tells me that the “fruits of my righteousness” will grow.  That certainly ought to be an obvious indicator.  If I am still struggling mightily, not just once in a while but constantly, to overcome the sins that held me captive before my conversion, then I am not growing as I ought to.  The time factor may be different for each one of us, but things should be improving.  I should become strong instead of fragile, someone who someday can help those who came from my identical circumstances.  If I cannot reach that point, something is amiss.
            Paul told the Colossians that their “knowledge” should be growing, 1:10.  When the same old chestnuts are tossed out in class, things that have been proven wrong by simple Bible study for years, I wonder if anyone is growing in knowledge.  Sitting on a pew will not do it.  It takes work, and it takes time.  It cannot be done in “14 minutes a day.”  I despair sometimes of the church ever reaching the point that it is once again known for its Bible knowledge as I see my Bible classes dwindling in number, and only frequented by older women.  When the new growth is only seen on the older vines, what does that say about our future?
            2 Cor 10:15 says my faith should be growing.  Do I show that with an ability to face trials in a more steady fashion than I used to?  Or do my words and actions, decrying God and questioning His love, show that I am no farther along than I was ten years ago?  Have I learned to accept His will and His ways, even when I do not understand them, or do I demand an explanation as if He were my child instead of the other way around?
            2 Pet 3:18 says we are to be growing in grace.  This one may be the most difficult one to assess, but think of this:  what does God’s grace excuse and pardon in you?  How patient was He when you were rebelling outright instead of just making ignorant and foolish mistakes? Now, how much grace do you grant to others who absent-mindedly get in your way, who have their own problems on their minds and are hardly aware of your presence?  Your neighbors, your colleagues, fellow shoppers, the driver in the car ahead of you—if you are not showing the grace of God to these in an obvious way you have not grown in grace as you should have.  If you are looking for a reason to sigh loudly, to complain, to blow that horn, instead of searching diligently for a way to offer grace as it was offered to you, you need to think again about your progress in the gospel.  I do too.
            All of us, no matter how long we have been Christians, should be showing growth.  In every area of our lives all of us should be sporting a different shade of green.
 
Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love. Eph 4:15-16
 
Dene Ward

Today's post is another in the continuing series by guest writer, Lucas Ward.

By far, the most common self-description of God is "I AM Jehovah who brought you out of the land of Egypt." It is repeated so often it almost becomes part of His name.  Quite often it is just mentioned as an identifier and perhaps as a justification for giving commands. Lev. 19:36  "Just balances, just weights, a just ephah, and a just hin, shall ye have: I am Jehovah your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt."  See also Deut. 20:1 and Ps. 81:10.
            Other times God gives some of the reasons He brought the Children of Israel out of Egypt:  to be their God and to give them the promised land.  Lev. 25:38, Numb. 15:41, Judges 2:12.
            The most common reason given for God bringing Israel out of Egypt is to free them from slavery.  Ex. 6:7, Lev. 26:13, Deut. 5:6, 8:14, & 13:5, etc. They were in Egypt as slaves and He brought them out to be free.  In fact, this was meant to be a permanent situation.  God didn't want His people enslaved.  This was made part of the Law.  For example, one way to get out of a bad financial situation in that time and culture was to sell yourself into slavery.  God, in the Law, states that if one of His people is in that situation, you weren't to treat him as a bond slave but as a hired hand and he was to be released at the Year of Jubilee.  (Lev. 25:39-46)  The reason God gives is simple:   "For they are my servants, whom I brought forth out of the land of Egypt: they shall not be sold as bondmen" (vs 42).  God had freed them from slavery and they were not to be enslaved again.
            God is the God who frees His people from slavery.
            This characteristic of God is clearly seen in the New Testament too.  John 8:34, among many other passages, tells us that "everyone who commits sin is the slave of sin".  God again found His people enslaved and led them to freedom. Rom. 6:17-18  "But thanks be to God, that, whereas ye were servants of sin, ye became obedient from the heart to that form of teaching whereunto ye were delivered; and being made free from sin, ye became servants of righteousness."  How did God accomplish this?  Through his Son, God worked out a way to lead us from the slavery of sin.  Rom. 3:23-25  "For all have sinned, and fall short of the glory of God; being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus:  whom God set forth to be a propitiation, through faith, in his blood, to show his righteousness because of the passing over of the sins done aforetime, in the forbearance of God."  We can have remission of sins through repentance and baptism into His Son. (Acts 2:38)  Our sins are blotted out (Acts 3:19).  We are now free from sin, free to serve righteousness.
            God also frees us from many worldly problems related to sin.  For instance, did you know that the #1 class of prescription drugs is antidepressants?  Because of sin many in this world feel dirty, worthless and unfit.  Paul tells us that, in freeing us from sin, God has washed, sanctified and justified us (1 Cor. 13:9).  We are no longer dirty, because God frees His people. 
            Lack of hope is another major problem for most people in the world.  Have you ever seen the bumper sticker "Life's a b****h and then you die"?  In fact, no hope in the world was the basis of several Greek philosophies.  Both the Stoics and Epicureans came to their conclusions from the premise of no hope.  The New Testament teaches differently.  75 times the word hope is used to describe the Christian life.  God is the God who frees us from hopelessness.
            God has made us free.  The only way we can ever again become enslaved is if we sell ourselves back to sin.  Let us instead rejoice in our freedom and our new chance to serve Him.
 
John_8:36  "If therefore the Son shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed."
 
Lucas Ward
 
 

We went for our annual visit to see Lucas in the panhandle and one morning he drove me across Pensacola Bay to a world famous fresh seafood market—Joe Patti's.  He had taken me one year before, after I had already bought the food we needed for our stay, but I was entranced with pile after pile of fish that had come from both the Bay and the Gulf in a boat only steps from the front door of that shop that very morning.  So I told him that the next time I would buy and cook something special for him.
            My plan was for crab stuffed red snapper, a recipe I had cobbled together after doing some research online and in the various cookbooks lining my shelves.  That snapper was beautiful, and I picked out a pound and a half fillet for the three of us, which was treated like gold as the young lady carefully wrapped it, then placed it on ice next to a cashier.  But I still needed the crabmeat.  I am used to 8 ounce containers of fresh crab where I live, but all of these were a full pound, and that made me a little chintzy.  Instead of jumbo lump, I picked up claw meat, and then promptly forgot the problem with that—I neglected to pick through it and pull out any extraneous shell.  That is, until my first bite gave me a solid crunch where there should not have been any.  I am happy to say that it was actually fairly clean for claw meat and I got most of the shell, so Lucas still had the enjoyment of an excellent seafood dinner with some of the best fish he ever ate.
            But I wonder if most of us aren't claw meat.  We have been entirely too careless in cleaning up our lives and have let a few things slip that we shouldn't have.  Especially if we have "grown up in the church" as we are prone to say, and have never committed any of the heinous sins we look down on the rest of the world for, it's easy to think we are nice jumbo lump crabmeat and the Lord ought to be happy he has us.  Do you think I am exaggerating?  I have seen too many people look down on people "straight off the street," just as Simon the Pharisee looked down on the brave woman who made her way into his party and anointed Jesus.  "She loves me more than you do, Simon," Jesus as much as said, and made it plain whom he preferred as his disciple.
            The thing about crabmeat is that even jumbo lump crabmeat needs to be picked through and it's a whole lot easier to find the shell!  Sin always finds its way in the door no matter who we are, how long we have been sitting on a pew, nor how well we think we are doing.  Let's be careful about judging others when we need a good pick-through ourselves.
 
Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand (Rom 14:4).
 
Dene Ward

I can remember my mother bringing the laundry in from the clothesline and filling up a long-necked green bottle with a top that looked a little like the pour spout of the sprinkling can she used on her flowers.  She carefully sprinkled water over the clothes she had already spent several hours washing and drying, turning them over to get both sides, and then stuffed them in a large zippered plastic bag.  Not a Ziploc, but something the size of a kitchen garbage sack with a real clothing zipper on it.  Then she put the bag in the refrigerator.  A few days later, she opened her ironing board, preheated her electric iron and spent several more hours ironing those clothes.  Every week.  Me?  I spend a couple hours every 2 months and that only because my boys and my husband love cotton shirts.  Lucky for me they only had a few of them, and now I am down to just a husband.
            I looked up the invention of permanent press fabric and must have found half a dozen dates.  Chemical companies, fabric companies, and clothing manufacturers all seem to claim a share of the glory all the way back to the 1930s.  Then in 1956 there was a patent that simply claims to be the invention of permanent press.  The problem was the way it was produced.  The resin on the cloth made the cloth stiff, uncomfortable to wear, and easily split when it was sewn.  Koret of California finally received a patent on March 14, 1961, for an improved method of manufacturing press-free crease-retained garments made with smooth, comfortable fabric that held up.  I barely remember the first time my mother bought my father a permanent press dress shirt so that date is just about right.  And all that brought something to mind.
            Maybe this is one of those urban legends that everyone has heard from someone.  I am really not certain, but Keith’s mother once told us about a young woman who began attending services with them back in the 1950s with her three young children, the oldest about 6.  She arrived just on time and left quickly.  But unlike many of those types, she was always there, her children knew the basic Bible stories, and she herself was attentive to both class and sermon.  In fact her keeping to herself seemed to be more a product of embarrassment than anything else.
            My mother-in-law, astute observer that she was, had noticed something.  The children were always neat, clean, and combed except for one thing—their clothes were always wrinkled.  This was back before the day of permanent press and polyester.  There is nothing quite as wrinkled as old-fashioned cotton—except maybe wrinkled linen—which was way beyond this woman’s means.
            I forget now how she managed to ask.  Maybe it was the offer of an iron, which I know she was generous enough to do.  Knowing my mother-in-law though, she probably just came out and asked.  However she did it, she got an answer.
            The woman’s husband was not a Christian.  He not only refused to attend services with her, he refused to get up and help her get the children ready.  So every week after their Saturday evening bath, she dressed them for church and then put them to bed.  The next morning it was easier to get the three tykes up and fed and herself dressed for church.
            After all these years, I’ve heard nearly every excuse in the world for missing Bible classes or the morning services altogether.  This young woman could have easily pulled two or three off the list and used them.  So why didn’t she?  I can think of three good reasons.
            First, she loved the Lord.  Nothing and no one was going to come between her and her Savior.  She knew the perils of allowing excuses to keep her away from the spiritual nutrition her soul needed, and she was not so arrogant as to think she could feed herself with no help at all.  “I can have a relationship with God without the church,” I have heard more times than I can count.  She knew better.
            And because she had her first priority correct, the others fell right in line.  She loved her children, but more than that she loved her children’s souls.  She had to combat not only the usual onslaught of the world, but the huge impact of a father’s bad example.  She was still in her early 20s so she had probably married quite young, too young to really understand the challenges of this “mixed” marriage, maybe even so naïve that she thought “love would conquer all” and he would change easily.  Now she knew better, but she was more than ever determined to save her children.
            And despite it all, she loved her husband and his soul too.  She knew that any little chink in her armor would allow him the rationale he needed to remain apathetic to her faith.  She understood Peter’s command in 1 Pet 3:1,2,  Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.  The more he resisted, the stronger she needed to be, and if taking her children to church in wrinkled clothes did the trick, then that’s what she would do.
            This young woman shows us all that excuses can be overcome by pure will.  Certainly we are not talking about the truly old, ill, and otherwise unable to go out either regularly or on occasion when there is truly a “bad day.”  We are talking about people who allow a little, or even a lot of trouble to become too much trouble to serve God.  I know many who work around the hurdles and snags that Satan throws in our paths.  It costs them time, money, and a whole lot of extra energy, but they have their priorities straight.  They know who comes first, and they understand that our modern “sacrifices” are an insult to the word. 
         If finding excuses comes easily for me, maybe I need to consider throwing out my permanent press and wearing some wrinkled clothes.
 
And when one of them that sat at meat with him heard these things, he said unto him, Blessed is he that shall eat bread in the kingdom of God. But he said unto him, A certain man made a great supper; and he bade many: and he sent forth his servant at supper time to say to them that were bidden, Come; for all things are now ready. And they all with one consent began to make excuse…And the servant came, and told his lord these things. Then the master of the house being angry said to his servant, Go out quickly into the streets and lanes of the city, and bring in hither the poor and maimed and blind and lame.  And the servant said, Lord, what thou didst command is done, and yet there is room.  And the lord said unto the servant, Go out into the highways and hedges, and constrain them to come in, that my house may be filled.  For I say unto you, that none of those men that were bidden shall taste of my supper.  Luke 14:15-24.
 
Dene Ward

I am reading a new magazine these days, at least new to me.  It's all about baking, as opposed to cooking in general, and when I received the first issue I devoured it immediately, figuratively speaking of course.  Since then, we have been devouring several of the recipes in it.  But I have had to "learn" this new periodical in the sense of what I can and cannot trust.  I have another magazine I have learned to trust implicitly.  90% of the recipes that I have tried not only worked, but became a part of my regular rotation.  This one maybe not.
            One article was all about Red Velvet.  The writer had taken several ordinary recipes and turned them into a "red velvet" recipe:  Red Velvet Cinnamon Rolls, Red Velvet Cheesecake Swirl Brownies, Red Velvet Eggnog Cake, and Cream Cheese Stuffed Red Velvet Cookies.  That cake is a sight to behold with top and bottom layers of beautiful red velvet cake and a middle layer of eggnog cheesecake, plus an Eggnog Buttercream Frosting.  Just writing that down makes my stomach swoon—way too rich and far too much trouble.  However, I have tried a couple of the other recipes.  Both of them gave me trouble, either because of scanty directions or simply wrong ones.
            The Cream Cheese Stuffed Red Velvet Cookies (which are also drizzled with melted white chocolate) were probably our favorites, but the recipe was definitely the most inaccurate.  First I made the dough which had to then be refrigerated for a half hour.  Then I made the filling which had to be frozen for 15 minutes.  Then I carefully portioned the dough into 60 balls, flattened them into disks, put a heaping teaspoon of filling on every other disk, then put an empty disk of dough over the one with the filling, pinched the edges together and flattened them on the cookie sheet, thirty times.  Then into the oven, 8-10 minutes the recipe said.  The first batch made me wonder, "Is this done?" as I put the second one in.  Usually a soft cookie will firm up as it cools on the cookie sheet.  These did not, so when the ten minutes was up on the second batch, I added two more, then two more, then another.  For the third batch I just put them in for 15 minutes—they were perfect.  I crossed my fingers and put that first batch back in the oven for another 8 minutes, reasoning that it would take at least three minutes for them to heat up, then they needed another 5 minutes of cooking.  Finally, they all turned out right.
            So I am not sure about this new magazine and whether I can trust it or not.  Especially when you consider that I made thirty cookies, measuring the dough exactly as told, when the recipe said it would only make 24, they should have taken less time to cook, not more.  I guess we will see.  I still have a couple more recipes I want to try out of this issue so it's a good thing it only comes every other month. 
            And that's just trusting your recipe sources.  We need to be able to trust our sources on things that are far more important than that.  Usually I can salvage a bad recipe and make it edible, but what about other things?  What about your salvation, for instance?
            I know some folks who completely trust their minister, or rabbi, or priest, or whoever.  They never open their Bibles and check out what it says for themselves.  Really?  You are going to trust someone else for your soul's destiny?  God has made it very easy for us to take care of those things ourselves.  You have a Book that has stood the test of Time for thousands of years.  The people who think they can find fault with it are again and again proven wrong.  There is no other book of such antiquity that has been shown to be so reliable, not even the works of Homer, Aristotle, Pliny, Herodotus, or any of several others.  You can know that what you read in your Bible is true and accurate.
            So what does your preacher tell you that you need to do?  "Pray the sinner's prayer," I often hear.  Guess what?  There is no such thing anywhere in the pages of the Bible.  I have read it through several times and it is just not there.  If that is what you are hearing, how can you believe any of the rest you have been told?  You will also not hear about baptism most of the time, but get out your Bible and read the book of Acts and guess what every conversion included?  Baptism!  So who is telling you it isn't important and why would they do such a thing?  Maybe you need to find yourself a new source—like the Book itself.  God will not lead you astray.  He does not "wish that any should perish" (2 Pet 3:9). 
            And after baptism, you still need to check things out.  Everyone can make a mistake including the most sincere and knowledgeable preacher out there.  Double-check what he tells you.  You know what Jesus said about blind leaders and followers.
            It's no big deal for me to give this baking magazine a few more chances, but your eternal destiny is a big deal.  Don't trust anyone else with it.
 
This is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior; who would have all men to be saved, and come to the knowledge of the truth (1Tim 2:3-4).
 
Dene Ward

We have experienced much in our forty some odd years of married life.  Joy, sorrow, excitement, abject terror, tornadoes, hurricanes, and floods, violent crime, automobile accidents, trips to the emergency room, frightening health issues, life-changing disabilities, serious economic woes, persecution on several levels—all of these and more have shaped us into who we are today.  I do my best to share with you what we have learned, and though we may have seen a lot, it still isn’t everything.  We can tell you some hair-raising stories, but we still consider ourselves blessed beyond measure.
            That’s one reason God gave us so many narratives in the Bible, so many faithful followers who have lived through practically every experience it is possible to live through. He has also given us people much closer to us, who set examples we can see every day.  Today I want to share with you a couple who went through one of the worst experiences in life—losing a child--and came out gold in God’s eyes. 
            My in-laws lost their little girl to cancer.  She went to the first day of school barely a month after her ninth birthday and had a seizure.  After a year of treatments and surgeries, even thinking for a while that the doctors “got it,” she died at 10.  I am not privy to everything that went on during that time.  But I did notice some things in them that seem to run counter to many of the things I have heard and read about experiences like this.
            First, Keith’s parents did not divorce.  Undoubtedly there were hard times.  I have seen that just in our marriage and the things we have dealt with.  Everyone grieves over losses in a different way and when I decide that my way is the only right way, there will be problems.  When I decide that my grief is worse than his, there will be problems.  When, “You just don’t understand,” becomes a wall instead of a bridge, you just might have reached the end.  However they managed it, the thought of divorce for these two never entered the picture.  This was a couple who understood lifelong commitment as they had vowed before God, “for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part,” and they were determined to make it through no matter how difficult it became.   
            I wish I could give you specifics, the things they did that helped and the things they did that did not, but that was long before I knew them.  This I know:  They had a strong marriage, and however they managed it, they did it “together.”  The communication seems never to have stopped, even though I am sure it was occasionally painful.  They had each other and they made sure that the hurt drew them together instead of driving them apart.  They were married just a few months months short of 60 years when my father-in-law passed away first. 
            Second, this couple did not lose their faith.  Their commitment to God came even before their commitment to each other.  They did not expect a life of ease and they never had one.  They endured poverty, estrangement from family because of their faith, and many illnesses, some near death, besides this horrible illness and loss of their child.  But they believed in the resurrection.  They knew they would see their child again, and that was a primary source of faith and encouragement.  Keith remembers hearing, “This is what we believe” more than once during that period.  And now they are enjoying the results of that faith, together with that lost daughter, and they will never lose her again.
            And then there was this:  they did not let this tragedy define them as a couple or a family.  Of course they remembered their little girl and spoke of her often.  I heard many “Remember whens” and other references.  They were more than willing to help those who had similar situations and better able than most to offer the needed sympathy, but it never became an entitlement issue.  They did not think they ranked above any other family because of the things they had suffered.  In their minds, we all suffer, just differently.  And they felt their own brand of suffering made them responsible to be examples and sympathizers with others, not worthy of praise and admiration—not “special.”  Pain and death come from Satan and they would never have given him any credit in any way imaginable.  In fact, if anyone had tried to compliment them for how well they had come through the grist mill of life, it just might have made them angry. 
          Of course this experience changes you.  Life changes you, but something like this makes that change happen rapidly.  Keith told me they were different than before, but “different” isn’t always bad.  I could still see all these good things I have shared with you when I came on the scene over ten years later.  Isn’t it funny how it all turns out?  I was the same age as Keith’s baby sister, born the same year, and my birthday was the date of her death.  Nowadays people would have expected traumatic results, and analyzed it to pieces.  But they never even mentioned the coincidences.  If Keith hadn’t told me, I would never have known what they had been through, and the rest of their life story came out slowly over the years, most often from listening to Keith reminisce, not them. 
            Even through all their trials they stayed faithful to God and each other.  In fact, Keith’s father was converted several years into their marriage, when they had already faced some challenges.  None of this “health and wealth” sissy gospel for him.  But then, this was a man who jumped out of an LST and waded through the water to the beaches of Normandy, walking all the way to Berlin.
           I hope that you never experience the horrible tragedy of losing a child, but you will suffer something.  That is the nature of life.  When you do, here is a godly couple whose example might help you through it.  Did they do everything right?  No, and they would never have claimed to.  But they did do this:  They never gave up on their relationship, and they never gave up on God.  That is how they made it through.
 
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow; but woe to him that is alone when he falls, and hath not another to lift him up. Again, if two lie together, then they have warmth; but how can one be warm alone? Eccl 4:9-11

Dene Ward
 

Interpretation that aims at, or thrives on, uniqueness can usually be attributed to pride (an attempt to “outclever” the rest of the world), a false understanding of spirituality (wherein the Bible is full of deeply buried truths waiting to be mined by the spiritually sensitive person with special insight), or vested interests (the need to support a theological bias, especially in dealing with texts that seem to go against that bias). Unique interpretations are usually wrong. This is not to say that the correct understanding of a passage may not often seem unique to someone who hears it for the first time. But it is to say that uniqueness is not the aim of our task.

Fee, Gordon D.; Stuart, Douglas. How to Read the Bible for All Its Worth (p. 22). Zondervan Academic. Kindle Edition.

Courtesy berksblog,net
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