I was ten years old the first time I remember anyone calling me “ugly.”  It was Sunday night, just after services had let out, sometime during the school year.  We all stood in pools of manmade light around the little rock church building, the adults talking and laughing together, the children scampering about in the front yard of the lot, usually girls together and boys together, except for the teenagers who stood together in a group off to one side, aloof from it all.  I didn’t do much running because of my vision, so it was easy for a boy to sneak up behind me, pull my hair and say that awful word.
            No, he did not have a crush on me.  That’s what they always told girls like me, that and the ugly duckling story.  I was overweight with a head full of frizzy hair, and big coke bottle glasses that made me look bug-eyed and a little stupid.  When he said it, he meant it.
            Despite my precarious vision, I fled around the side of the building into the blackness of the back yard—no lights to see here, either ugly me or my ugly tears.  I would never have gone back there for any other reason—it was far too scary and I tripped over things right in front of me even in broad daylight, but that dark, shadowy place was where I thought I belonged, because I had seen myself in the mirror and I believed him.  I had also heard several adults talk about my “ugly glasses,” and what a shame it was I had to wear them.  What they didn’t realize was since I could not see at all without them (a +17.5 prescription), they were as much a part of me as my nose or any other part of my face.  They were my eyes, and if they were ugly, so was I.
            Child psychology has come a long way.  We know that children believe what others say about them.  If you tell a child he is bad, he will live up to it.  And if you tell a little girl she is ugly, it will take her decades to get over it.
            So why do we do this thing to ourselves?  Why do we go on and on about being “only human,” as if being made in the image of God were a bad thing?  Why do we constantly tell one another we are “not perfect?”  Why do we introduce ourselves as “sinners?”  Okay, maybe it is a humility thing, but I see too many times when it is something else entirely—it’s an excuse for not doing better.  And the more often we give ourselves those excuses, the more often we will need them.
            Listen instead to the Word of God:
The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, Rom 8:16.
For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works…Eph 2:10.
And, having been set free from sin, [you] have become servants of righteousness, Rom 6:18.
…But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God, 1 Cor 6:11.
But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light, 1 Pet 2:9.
            That’s what you are—God’s work, God’s children, chosen, royal, holy, righteous, sanctified.  Tell yourself that every morning. Look in the mirror and say the words aloud.  We are “called saints” right along with those Corinthian brethren, 1 Cor 1:2.  Stop calling yourself a sinner all the time.  If that is what you believe, that is what you will do, and then find yourself running back into the darkness trying to hide from it all.
            Turn on the light and call yourself by the names God does.  This is an “Ugly Duckling” story that has really come true.  You are His child, and that makes you beautiful.
 
See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Beloved, we are God's children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is. And everyone who thus hopes in him purifies himself as he is pure, 1 John 3:1,2.
 
Dene Ward

Today's sobering post is by guest writer, Keith Ward.
 
I’ve seen it on Facebook more than once: “I can’t wait for 2020 to be over.” But there is no magic in the turning of a page on the calendar.  Maybe it is time to take stock carefully from a biblical perspective.  Maybe the times we face are partially the result of, “Be careful what you pray for because you might get it.”

We look around us and everywhere there is wickedness.  When was the last time we voted, whichever party, for a person we believed in rather than the lesser of two evils? And speaking of two, now man has proclaimed there are 5 or 6 or more sexes.  Homosexuality is not just accepted but imposed.  Murder goes unpunished, victims do not count.  Abortion destroys millions of new lives every year.  Violence runs riot in the streets.  Lies and deception are the currency of both politics and business.  Hatred and racism explode.  Truly, things have become so bad that no one can conceive of a solution: there is no way back.  God is a foolish myth and crutch in the minds of the majority and the Bible is a collection of myths that were only needed by more primitive societies.   Religion is mocked, immorality praised, pornography runs rampant and a “relationship” is sex with the same person exclusively for at least a week.  When was the last time there was a nuclear family on TV that was not a 50s re-run? How can we repent when we “call evil good and good evil” (Isa 5:20)?

I have prayed about it, as have you.  I am not even sure what to say anymore when I pray for our country because everything has become so wicked. 
So, now, what if God has heard all our voices and this is the beginning of His reckoning with our nation, the beginning of “the day of the Lord, a day of darkness and not light” (Amos 5:18-20)?  If 2020 is the best year of the rest of our lives, how do we as Christians prepare?

Priority has to be to build our faith and that of our families.  I have served God fifty years and I am not sure I am ready for days like those of Habakkuk and Jeremiah and Ezekiel and Daniel: days of persecution from “the people,” uprooted and cursed and hated.  I like to think I could do it, but I will be upping my level of preparation.

How can one stand such trials when he has never put himself in the trial of opposing abortion openly? Or homosexuality? Or immorality?  How can one stand up with a faith prepared to die for the Lord when he rarely opens his Bible between services and never stands up for Jesus by declaring the truth of the gospel to fishing or football buddies?

We want our children to go to heaven in spite of such trials, but we have not helped them with questions about the reliability of the Bible, or the science that supports the Bible, or the history and archaeology that do the same because we have not learned these things ourselves.  We have not opposed the arguments against God with sound reasoning for God, so how do we or our children “stand your ground on the evil day, and having done everything, to stand?”  (Eph 6:13).
 
We want to stand the trials, but have not exercised spiritually to prepare for a hard race.  We have not memorized scriptures to call to our minds for strength, we have not studied and meditated to strengthen our confidence in our tie with God, we have not prayed the hours necessary to strengthen our holiness before God. 

When we do an honest analysis, many of us in many ways have not done all that well with the moderate trials of 2020.  We bicker whether the one wearing a mask or the one not wearing one has the most faith rather than loving brethren more than our opinions.  We complain about restrictions.  We are not picking up the slack in our ability to assemble by studying more, praying more, growing more.  Instead, many have become comfortable with TV church in our pajamas.

2020 may be, in fact, God’s grace, God’s “not willing that any should perish” warning, and time to face the judgment on our nation in our times.  If so, have you missed the opportunity?
 
"And they have healed the hurt of the daughter of my people slightly, saying, Peace, peace; when there is no peace.  " (Jer 8:11).
 
"For the hurt of the daughter of my people am I hurt: I mourn; dismay hath taken hold on me.  Is there no balm in Gilead? is there no physician there? why then is not the health of the daughter of my people recovered? " (Jer 8:21-22).
 
"For if these things are yours and abound, they make you to be not idle nor unfruitful unto the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ….  Wherefore, brethren, give the more diligence to make your calling and election sure: for if ye do these things, ye shall never stumble: " (2Pet 1:8-10).
 
"I know thy works, that thou hast a name that you live , and you are dead.  You be watchful, and establish the things that remain, which were ready to die: for I have found no works of yours perfected before my God.   " (Rev 3:1-2).
 
Keith Ward

I don’t get it.  Something is very wrong when we make heroes out of monsters.  First it was vampires, and now zombies.  But did you know this?  We have spiritual vampires and zombies out there too, and some of us make heroes out of them.
            Televangelists and faith healers come to mind.  Has there ever been a more despicable sort of bloodsucker?  They use the desperate, the ill, the old, the ones afraid of dying without God, and steal their money and their minds, basking in the adoration of distressed souls who want just one last vestige of health and a moment of relieved peace before their deaths.  Yes, a lot of it is their own fault.  If they knew and loved the Word of God as they should they would not have been deluded so as to “believe a lie” (2 Thes 2:9-11).  Yet Satan’s ministers are good-looking, amiable, charismatic people, and even the good-hearted can be deceived if they aren’t careful (2 Cor 11:13-15).
            But the worst are surely the walking dead. For as the Father raises the dead and gives them life, so also the Son gives life to whom he will, John 5:21.  Notice, Jesus said this well before he ever raised anyone from the dead.  Most commentators believe he was talking here about raising the spiritually dead, and the full context proves them correct. 
            How are we dead?  Most of us can easily quote passages saying we were once “dead in sin,” but Jesus was talking to the Jews of the day, God’s people. 
            Verse 16 tells us these people were seeking to kill Jesus because he healed on the Sabbath.  They understood when it suited them that healing on the Sabbath was not a sin; they did the same for their animals.  But their traditions outweighed the clear dictum of the Law to “love thy neighbor as thyself.”  In another healing, Jesus quite purposefully called the woman who was bowed together a “daughter of Abraham” in order to shame the ruler who did not want her healed (Luke 13:15,16).  Follow the man born blind in John 9 and see the ridiculous lengths they went to in order to condemn a man who could heal as no one ever had before.  Why, this is an amazing thing! You do not know where he comes from, and yet he opened my eyes, John 9:30.  Even Jesus was amazed at their determination not to see his obvious origins, and therefore his authority to heal whenever he pleased. 
            That determination is shown earlier in John 5.  They clearly understood that Jesus claimed a relationship with God that was above and beyond their own, yet despite the works he did, and thus the witness shown by God through those works, they denied that witness, one that shone clearly to any who dared to actually see. 
            Those people who thought they were the one true people of God, following the one true Law, couldn’t even tell when God was among them.  What did Jesus have to say about that?  Whoever does not honor the Son does not honor the Father who sent him, John 5:24.  Don’t count on your pedigree in the faith.  Don’t count on following the rules.  These people had the first (Abraham is our father, John 8:39), and did the second, but Jesus says to them, Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life. He does not come into judgment, but has passed from death to life, John 5:24.  He was calling them dead, yet they were still on this earth walking around, still in charge of God’s people, a people they disdained, John 7:48,49.
            How are we doing as a people of God?  Do we truly listen, or have we become nothing more than a self-righteous, unloving group that prides itself on having been baptized and following a set of rules, including a bunch we devised ourselves and then judge others for not keeping.  As sad as it is, we have the walking dead still among us, and some people think they are heroes. 
 
“And to the angel of the church in Sardis write: ‘The words of him who has the seven spirits of God and the seven stars. “‘I know your works. You have the reputation of being alive, but you are dead. Wake up, and strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have not found your works complete in the sight of my God.  Remember, then, what you received and heard. Keep it, and repent. If you will not wake up, I will come like a thief, and you will not know at what hour I will come against you, Rev 3:1-4. 
 
Dene Ward

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven, Matt 6:10.
            All my life I have thought of this in a passive sense.  I pray for something, just as the Lord did in Matt 26:39, 42, and then add, “But thy will be done,” as if God is the only one who is expected to do His will.  Then suddenly one day I thought, “Doing God’s will is the simple definition for obedience.”  If I am praying for His will to be done, I have an obligation to do that will myself.
            I cannot pray, “Thy will be done” if I look at one of his commands and say, “But God wouldn’t mind if…”  I can’t expect an answer to my prayers if my answer to His will is, “I do well at everything else and this is such a small thing.”  If I do not obey in even one instance I am not doing His will.
            So I did a quick little study.  I may have thought that “God’s will” had more to do with what He does, but I was wrong.  Notice the following.
            “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven, Matt 7:21.  A lot of people out there go around doing “good deeds,” but if doing God’s will doesn’t come first, it isn’t worth a thing.
            For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother, Matt 12:50.  You are not in the Lord’s family if you are finding excuses for your disobedience.
            Jesus said to them, “My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to accomplish his work, John 4:34    If you want to follow in his footsteps, doing the Father’s will must become an essential of life, every bit as much as food.
            If anyone's will is to do God's will, he will know whether the teaching is from God or whether I am speaking on my own authority, John 7:17.  You can’t go around claiming to know and teach about Jesus if you are not obeying the Father.
            Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect, Rom 12:2.  The only way to know God’s will is to change your life.
            For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality, 1Thess 4:3.  You are not doing the Father’s will if you are engaging in sexual sins of any kind.
            Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you, 1Thess 5:18. You are not doing God’s will if you are whining and complaining about your station in life, about your trials, about the suffering you must deal with, especially those due to your faith.
            For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised, Heb 10:36.  It isn’t always easy to do the Father’s will and the task is never completed.  One good deed doesn’t mean your work is finished.
            [God will] equip you with everything good that you may do his will, working in us that which is pleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen, Heb 13:21.  No matter how hard it seems, he will see that you have whatever you need to do His will.  If you didn’t manage to do it, it was your fault, not His.
            The next time you end a prayer, “Thy will be done,” remember that you are as much responsible for that as He is.  If you aren’t willing to do His will in every aspect of your life, why should He believe you mean it when you pray?  And why should He do what YOU want, when you won’t do what HE wants?
 
Since therefore Christ suffered in the flesh, arm yourselves with the same way of thinking, for whoever has suffered in the flesh has ceased from sin, so as to live for the rest of the time in the flesh no longer for human passions but for the will of God, 1Pet 4:1-2.
 
Dene Ward

Today's post is by guest writer Keith Ward.
 
More than once I have been rebuked for the way I spoke to someone about the condition of his soul.  I then asked whether the situation was as I had judged it to be and those who rebuked agreed that it was.  I pointed out that the thing that I said was the same as Jesus, an apostle, or a prophet had said under similar circumstances and they agreed that is so.  I asked, well then, do you think that I spoke with love for him and his soul?  And, again, they agreed that I had.  Well, then, what is wrong?  Well, he (and his family/friends) are upset.  Jesus upset more people than he converted.   God will not allow me or you not to speak--"If I say to the wicked, ‘You shall surely die,’ and you give him no warning, nor speak to warn the wicked from his wicked way, in order to save his life, that wicked person shall die for his iniquity, but his blood I will require at your hand."  (Ezek 3:18).   How can any spiritual person stop the voice of salvation to the lost brother?  I just don't understand.
 
Many members avoid every opportunity to learn the Bible.  They seek simple Bible classes about things they already know; they attend only part of the services.  In contrast are those who despite their own shortcomings or ability, and the same problems of time, seek out every opportunity to learn.  They study, fill in blanks, analyze, erase and try again.  They do this for the same reason a bride studies her husband.  Meanwhile, many times their number sing with gusto, "Oh how I love Jesus," but spend more time on their Gameboys than in their Bibles.   How can they believe they fool anyone, much less God, that they love him with all their hearts?  With all their souls?  With all their minds?   I just don't understand.
 
I cannot understand those who think the Lord's Supper is some kind of magic potion that will fix everything they have made little to no effort to change since the last time they bowed their heads so sincerely and prayed so hard.  And, if the past years of their lives are any clue to their future, they never will make much effort to change except to pray harder and think harder about Jesus on the cross.  It certainly looks like Calvinist mental faith-only to me.  After speaking of those who keep walking in the same old ways, Paul said, "But that is not the way you learned Christ!"  (Eph 4:20).  Then he goes on to instruct concerning the changes they need to make in their walk.  The Lord's Supper is no shortcut to heaven that excuses one from the work of changing himself.
 
I cannot understand those who proclaim all the proper pious phrases but never seem to apply any of them to their own lives.  "I know I am not perfect," translates to, "I really do not know of or admit any faults."  "Any man who shows me I am wrong will be my friend," translates to, "It can't be done no matter how many incidents and scriptures you list."  "I am doing the best I can and that is all God asks" translates to, "I am not studying much and have no intention of changing who I am."  They often quote pet scriptures and are somewhat knowledgeable, but they never see their own flaws when they look into James' mirror. 
 
I cannot understand those who come to church but are not of the church.  They participate when they feel like it.  They pay attention when it interests them, can often be seen playing on their devices.  They are perennially late and usually the first out the door.  Christians in name only, they have less hope than the man down the street who has yet to hear the gospel.
 
I cannot understand those things because I want to go to heaven no matter what it takes.  I know that I cannot know God or love him unless I know his word.  It takes a lot of study to get a little insight into God's character and how intensely he loves us.  The Lord's Supper is on every page of the Bible because Jesus is.  It will be in our hearts "till he come" and is my hope that "I'll Fly Away."  Each thing learned leads to something I need to change for who I am is not good enough.  I can never be really "good enough," but if I do my best by Jesus' standards (Parable of talents) rather than by my desire to get along on minimum effort, his grace will make me whole.  This I can readily understand.
 
"Brothers, my heart's desire and prayer to God for them is that they may be saved.  For I bear them witness that they have a zeal for God, but not according to knowledge.  For, being ignorant of the righteousness of God, and seeking to establish their own, they did not submit to God's righteousness." (Rom 10:1-3).
 
"My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins." (Jas 5:19-20).

Keith Ward

I found an article from Slate, an online magazine, about the problems the deaf are facing with Covid 19.  The writer, a deaf woman, reminded her audience that the deaf need to lip read, and the mask requirement kept her from being able to do so.  Considering that the magazine is generally classified as liberal, I was shocked at the tenor of the comments the article engendered.  "So she doesn't care if she kills someone because she is left out of a conversation?!" was the tenor of one of the worst.  Suddenly the woman had become a would-be murderer because she even mentioned the problem.

For someone who, as a liberal, is supposed to be so much more enlightened and compassionate than the general population, the commenter showed herself to be remarkably stupid.  "Being left out of a conversation" was not the issue.  That was a synecdoche for being left out of life, in fact, being put in danger oneself.  You have no idea what it is like not to hear warnings like fire or smoke alarms or sirens.  Not being able to casually pick up in the background from television or another conversation a piece of news that might change your special plans or your established routine, information that might save endless delays or even a life.  Not knowing what in the world you doctor is telling you at your checkup.  All these things and so much more the hearing world takes for granted.  That comment was completely unsympathetic to the needs of the deaf. 

If you think it was uncommon, you have not been deaf or lived with a deaf person as I have.  This has been going on far longer than Covid 19.  A deaf friend told us about the time many years ago when she was in someone's way in an aisle at the grocery store without realizing it.  Evidently the other shopper had tried the usual, "Excuse me," several times because when she finally put her hand on our friend's arm, her aggravation was apparent.

"I'm so sorry," our friend said, "but I am deaf and did not hear you," and instantly moved out of the way.  The woman was embarrassed but rather than apologize herself, acted like it was our deaf friend's fault.  We have found that the general reaction to not having heard someone is that you must be either rude or stupid.  No one ever thinks you might be deaf. 

And the treatment we have received in doctor's offices the past few months has been no better.  Nurses have been rude and officious when I insist on going into the exam room with my husband so I can hear for him, no matter how calmly or politely I phrase it.  In fact, one acted like he had become deaf on purpose just so he could cause her trouble!

It isn't the lack of sympathy that we are seeing, though.  It is the lack of empathy.  Keith says that he can be sympathetic, but he is not sure he can be empathetic.  I beg to differ.  He may not know exactly how someone feels who is experiencing something he never has, but he always treats their feelings as valid.  Not many others do.

I noticed this when the "Me Too" movement started.  While I am just as worried as anyone else about unscrupulous women who might use this new ability to talk about these things openly to ruin a good man's reputation, that doesn't mean that what millions of women have gone through is not true.  I sat in a Bible class of 9 women and 4 of them—that's nearly half for the math-challenged—had a story to tell.  We were all "of a certain age," and the events had happened when it was not considered acceptable to report them, especially if you needed the job, or the grade, or any number of other things.  For a man to disregard these stories just because the women didn't turn the men in, shows yet more lack of empathy.  They had not been through it with the cultural baggage that was laid on women in those times, so "it just can't be."  Yes, it can.    When you dismiss the experiences in the context of the culture at the time and the effects on another person's attitudes or life, you are dismissing them.  You just. Don't. Get it.  Some of the statements and attitudes I have seen from even my own brethren, instantly vilifying people from other cultures or life experiences simply because they are different from theirs, horrifies me.  That is what Romans 14 is all about, and what they don't realize is that God expects us to "get it." 

For though I am free from all, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win more of them. To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews. To those under the law I became as one under the law (though not being myself under the law) that I might win those under the law. To those outside the law I became as one outside the law (not being outside the law of God but under the law of Christ) that I might win those outside the law. To the weak I became weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all people, that by all means I might save some. I do it all for the sake of the gospel, that I may share with them in its blessings.  (1Cor 9:19-23).

You see, the ultimate purpose of our empathy is to gain lost souls.  If I do not recognize what other people have gone through, what they are bringing to the table as cultural baggage, or the kind of life they have led previously, or the way they were brought up, I will never be able to reach them.  If I am not regularly practicing the kind of empathy that, while it might not be able to feel the exact emotions of the affected person, at least treats them as real and valid, I won't be able to "turn it on" when it really matters—when a soul can be lost if I don't.  That patronizing little smile is insulting, not flattering.  That brush-off of an answer is infuriating, not comforting.  People know when you are truly trying to reach them where they stand and when you are simply too arrogant to consider their backgrounds and emotions real and worth the trouble.

The Lord thought we were worth the trouble.  He did what it took so he could "get it."  Are you a disciple who follows in the Master's footsteps or not?
 
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need (Heb 4:15-16).

I am under obligation both to Greeks and to barbarians, both to the wise and to the foolish. So I am eager to preach the gospel to you also who are in Rome (Rom 1:14-15).
 
Dene Ward

1. I come to the garden alone,
   While the dew is still on the roses,
   And the voice I hear falling on my ear
   The Son of God discloses.
   • Refrain:
     And He walks with me, and He talks with me,
     And He tells me I am His own;
     And the joy we share as we tarry there,
     None other has ever known.
2. He speaks, and the sound of His voice
   Is so sweet the birds hush their singing,
   And the melody that He gave to me
   Within my heart is ringing.
3. I’d stay in the garden with Him,
   Though the night around me be falling,
   But He bids me go; through the voice of woe
   His voice to me is calling.

 
This hymn was one of my Daddy's favorites, but I must admit that, as a child, I never really knew what it meant.  I finally figured out my own context, which we will get to later, but it is a far cry from the meaning the author intended.
      Charles Austin Miles was a pharmacist, and evidently a staunch Methodist.  One morning he was reading John 20, where Mary Magdalene comes upon the risen Lord.  In his own telling of how he came to write the song, he suddenly pictured himself as standing there with them watching their interaction as if he, too, were part of the action in a vision "sent from God."  Afterward he wrote the hymn, "by inspiration of the Holy Spirit," he believed.  I have my doubts about that and the vision, but he certainly wrote a beautiful song.
      When someone initially tried to have it included in the official Methodist hymnal the first time, it became apparent that people either loved it or hated it.  The haters made accusations that included "too erotic," which stunned me until I realized the problem. 
      As a musician we are taught the various historical eras of music—Ancient, Medieval, Renaissance, Baroque, Classical, Romantic, and then the Twentieth Century which has so many styles it is difficult to classify it, and the 21st?  It may take a few more years for it all to settle out.  Those same eras and characteristics were true of literature and art. 
     The Romantic Era began in the first few decades of the 19th century.  Beethoven was considered a transition composer between the Classical and the Romantic, if that helps.  A lot of people, who were used to the balanced, well-ordered, and impersonal Classical Era were a little shocked at the new music and poetry that was being written.  The poetry was extremely personal and it was full of lush description.  Look through the lyrics above.  "While the dew is still on the roses."  His voice is "so sweet the birds hush their singing."  That is Romantic poetry in a nutshell.  (Remember, we are talking Romantic as in a historic style, not as in romance novels.)
      So the song is about Mary and Jesus meeting together just after his resurrection.  "The joy we share as we tarry there none other has ever known," is a direct reference to the fact that Mary was the first to see him.  At that point in time, no other person had felt what she was feeling then.  If you have sung the newer hymn "Rabboni", this is the first version.
      One line might be a little inaccurate.  It seems fairly obvious that Mary and Jesus did not stay in that garden all day long, though the third verse mentions that "the night around them is falling."  But the point Mr. Miles makes is a valid one.  For Mary to stay there would have been contrary to the Lord's purpose in appearing to her.  She was to go tell the apostles.  She was the first witness.  And as a woman in that day and culture, the fact that the gospel writers chose to use a woman as a witness adds to the evidence of truth.  Women were considered unreliable witnesses.  If the whole story were made up, surely they would have chosen a witness other than a woman.
      So what had I been thinking before this as I sang this song?  I saw the garden as a metaphor for prayer.  When I pray, I am alone with the Lord in a beautiful place, but as much as I would like to stay, I have to leave him sooner or later.  Not that I can't speak to him whenever I want to during the day, as I often do, but that formal alone time has to end.
      I really don't see a problem with thinking of the song that way.  The Lord doesn't want us down on our knees cloistered away from the world all day long.  He wants us out in it, seeking the lost, serving others, and spreading his influence.  We have to go back to "the world of woe" eventually, but while we are there, isn't the experience just as wonderful as Mary's, spending time with our risen Lord, knowing his death has saved us and his resurrection has allowed us to someday spend that time with him forever?
 
But Mary stood weeping outside the tomb, and as she wept she stooped to look into the tomb. And she saw two angels in white, sitting where the body of Jesus had lain, one at the head and one at the feet. They said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?” She said to them, “They have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid him.” Having said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing, but she did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?” Supposing him to be the gardener, she said to him, “Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I will take him away.” Jesus said to her, “Mary.” She turned and said to him in Aramaic, “Rabboni!” (which means Teacher).  (John 20:11-16).
 
Dene Ward

Keith has been keeping a journal since Lucas was born.  We always use a five subject spiral notebook, beginning a new page for every day, and come within a couple dozen pages of filling it completely.  That means we have stored up forty-three of those notebooks and are working on the forty-fourth.  Sometimes we pull one out and read it, usually laughing out loud here and there, occasionally cringing at something stupid we did or some ordeal we went through and can hardly imagine now. 
              Keith has made an index of "important things" in our lives, one manila cardstock page for each year, all clipped together.  If we need to know when we purchased something that has gone kaput, we can pull out half a dozen sheets from about the right time, and quickly skim them until we find it.  If we need to know when one or the other of us had a surgery or the last tetanus shot or any number of other things, five minutes will tell us all we need to know.
            At first, as a young mother who scarcely had time to think, and certainly not much time for myself, I hardly wrote in the things.  But as the boys grew up and no longer needed Mommy every few minutes, could dress themselves, bathe themselves, and entertain themselves, I began to add a page here and there—to get my side in, which is our inside joke about it.  For well over the past twenty years I, too, write in it every day.  The only problem I have is that now that we are together 24/7, if he tells everything we have done in a day, I have nothing left to write except, "Yep."
            This year we have had a bit of a problem.  Suddenly, usually on the edges of the page, the pen stops writing.  These are the same style and company's pens we have used for decades.  Occasionally I can pick up another pen and fill in the missing letters, but not every time.  It makes this usually pleasant chore a real aggravation. 
             The other night Keith left me to go study, carrying the same pen with him that had just refused to write not only on the edges of the page but smack in the middle, too.  He pulled out a sheet of cheap notebook paper to take notes as he studied and the pen wrote just fine anywhere on the page.  That made him think.  He came back to the journal and pulled it out.  We have always used Mead notebooks.  This was one we found on a super-cheap sale, a Stellar—which it evidently is not!  The problem was not the pen; the problem was the paper, some sort of finish that kept the ink from writing on it in scattered places.  Unfortunately, we bought two of the things.  That second one will go somewhere else, not as our next journal, and we will just have to suffer through the rest of the year with this one.
            For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, declares the LORD: I will put my law within them, and I will write it on their hearts. And I will be their God, and they shall be my people.  (Jer 31:33).
           In this time of the new covenant, God is writing his law upon our hearts.  He expects that our "obedience of faith" as Paul calls it twice in the book of Romans, will be "obedience from the heart" (Rom 6:17).  That heart will "delight to do his will" (Psa 37:31; Rom 7:22).  That kind of heart will "know righteousness" (Isa 51:7).  That kind of heart, pure and sincere even as it follows God's rules carefully, is what He demands from His people. 
            God writes on our hearts through the Holy Spirit (2 Cor 3:3).  As we fill ourselves with His Word, our hearts are being etched with a marker far more perfect than the ones we use.  God's writing implement works just fine.  If He is having trouble writing on your heart, it's not the pen that is at fault, it's your heart.
 
And you show that you are a letter from Christ delivered by us, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts  (2Cor 3:3).
 
Dene Ward

We didn't have much money when I was growing up.  It helped that my Daddy could and would tinker with anything in order to fix it.  Toasters, lawn mowers, electric frying pans, anything that had stopped working he would take apart and play with until he figured it out and got it going again.
            We once had a television set he had to tinker with.  In those days you had to get up and turn the knob yourself if you wanted to change the channel (there were only 3) or the volume.  Another knob took care of the horizontal hold, and I imagine most of you are saying, "The what?"  Finally, the horizontal hold just quit holding, but he figured out that if you whacked the top of the set firmly, it would hold again.  We usually whacked it at least once for every show we watched, but that always fixed the problem.
            As for that channel knob, something had slipped in the cogs and it would no longer settle directly on the correct inner slot so you could get that channel.  (Don't ask me to explain any of this, just trust me.)  The knob was round with two flat places that stood out from the round part, directly opposite each other.  That's how you turned it—by putting your thumb under one of those flat spots and the rest of your fingers over the other, pushing clockwise.
            Daddy whittled a wooden stick just long enough to wedge between one of those flat spots and the lip of the television cabinet over the channel changing knob.  First you put the knob in roughly the right place, then you wedged in the stick and pushed until you got the picture to come in.  Then you carefully let go, trying not to breathe too hard that close to the stick, backed away and sat down.  Then, and only then, could you get that channel.
            Yes, it was a lot of trouble to get the thing to work.  It was so much trouble that we were burglarized once and the thieves left that TV.  The little stick was sitting on top of it, so we know they tried it and just couldn't figure it out.  What thief would want a "high maintenance" TV when the next house probably had one that worked easily?
             So why not just buy a new TV?  Did I mention the money problem?  As long as something worked, we could not afford to replace it.  Only when something broke beyond repair, and something that we really needed, did we scrape together the money to replace it, and a television was not a "necessity."
            I think we've had a high maintenance lawn mower in our married life, one that had to be started just so, or stopped just so and had to be held just so or it would quit altogether.  Many people would have just gone out and bought another, but did I mention the money problem?  We had it, too.
            I have known some women who bragged about being "high maintenance women."  For the life of me I cannot understand why that is something to brag about.  You would think they would be afraid their husbands might just go out and get a new one.  Unless maybe there are money problems.
            And then there are the high maintenance Christians, something else I would never brag about.  You know who they are.  They want attention about anything and everything in their lives, even if others have similar or worse problems.  Everyone is supposed to visit when they are sick or even "just because."  If they don't get the attention they think they deserve, they will simply stop attending the worship services and it's all our fault for not taking care of them.  They take offense easily and the preacher has to kowtow to their whims to get them back.  The elders are supposed to listen to them more than anyone else, and if they don't, they "just might leave."  When they do finally do something, they expect lavish praise from the pulpit, the bulletin, and the grapevine or the whole church is labeled "ungrateful hypocrites."  If they need a rebuke, everyone walks on eggshells around them trying to figure out a way that won't upset them.
            Seems to me that God doesn't have the money problems we have always had.  And it isn't about replacement either.  God does not need any of us. He bestows His blessings, including salvation, out of love and grace, not because we deserve it.  Instead of self-absorption, God wants self-denial and self-control.  If we know what's good for us we will be someone who is much easier to get along with and who will work well for Him without needing any of the tinkering nonsense we always had to do with our television. I would think we would all be so grateful to Him and so afraid of hell that none of us would even court the idea of being a "high maintenance" Christian.
            Or maybe that high maintenance Christian just needs God to give him a good whack once in a while.
 
Wherefore, brethren, give the more diligence to make your calling and election sure: for if you do these things, you shall never stumble: for thus shall be richly supplied unto you the entrance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  (2Pet 1:10-11).
 
Dene Ward

We noticed it on Friday night.  The fridge temperature was up to 43 from the usual 38 we aim at.  We always keep a thermometer in it just so we can monitor these things, but we had been in and out of it all day, gradually adding several pounds of produce from the garden, most of it still warm from a Florida sun even after a good rinse in cool tap water.  We decided that must be the problem.

The next morning, after a good 12 hours without opening the door, the fridge temperature was up to 48.  Well, that's not good, we thought, and called our friendly appliance repairman who also happens to be a brother.  We told him it was not an emergency, so don't come out on a weekend, but was there something we could check and maybe fix ourselves?  Not really, as it turns out, so we loaded it with ice blocks in an effort to use it as one big cooler until we could have it seen to. 

On Sunday morning, the temperature was up to 56.  Since, during the lockdown, we are having our own church services with one of our other members, we did so as usual, and then called the repairman again.  He was perfectly happy to come check things out, and even brought his family so we could chat while he and Keith worked on the fridge.  By the time he arrived, after we had both had our "in-home family services," the temperature was up to 68 inside the refrigerator.  Considering the huge blocks of ice we had placed in it to obviously no avail, we expected this to be a really huge, and expensive, problem. Maybe even a total replacement problem.

It only took about five minutes to discover what was wrong.  He looked at Keith and said, "Your thermometer says it's 68 in here.  Mine, even with me standing here with the door wide open, says it's 42."  The refrigerator wasn't broken; the thermometer was.  Whew!  Cheap fix, even if a little embarrassing.

It's easy to look good when you measure yourself against the world.  The more I read about the ancient Romans, the more frightened I become for our country's sake.  Sometimes you can't tell which country is being described—them or us.  Considering what God did to them, I worry what might happen here.

You can look pretty good when you measure yourself against your neighbors, too.  Many are decent people, but the majority would not have any qualms about a little cheating on their taxes, or telling "little white lies," or using the common expletives we hear all around us.  You, I hope, would know better and do better.

And if you are really careful about whom you choose, you can even look good compared to some of your brethren.  We are all fighting battles, but some fight a lot harder than others who have just decided "that's how I am," and let it go.  Yes, when you measure yourself against someone with that attitude, you will probably come out on top.

But God expects us to use His standard.  We are called to follow a much worthier calling and a much higher example than the people around us.  For God called you to do good, even if it means suffering, just as Christ suffered for you. He is your example, and you must follow in his steps. He never sinned, nor ever deceived anyone. He did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly. (1Pet 2:21-23).

God will judge you fairly too, based on His standard, not the one you might be using now.  You might wind up thinking you are just fine, when the reality is far different.
 
Not that we dare to classify or compare ourselves with some of those who are commending themselves. But when they measure themselves by one another and compare themselves with one another, they are without understanding.  (2Cor 10:12)
 
Dene Ward