Whenever we whiz past workers on the interstate, I cringe, especially if they are not standing behind the "protection" of those concrete barriers.  What if one of them slipped and fell?  What if a couple of them were engaging in horseplay and a little shove propelled one into traffic?  What if…  My imagination can run overtime with those things, I'm afraid, but even if I were not to blame, I would feel terrible if he fell in front of my car.

              I know that is so because when I was a child, one of my parents' friends accidentally killed a child who was riding his bike around his neighborhood.  No, it was not the man's fault.  The boy was not watching where he was going and simply whizzed out into the middle of the street.  Maybe, as an inexperienced child, he thought a car could stop on a dime.  I don't know, but he was killed instantly.

              Our friend was a wreck.  Witnesses stood by him and he was cleared of all culpability, but he still had a hard time with it.  Over and over he kept thinking, "I killed an innocent child," and the word "accident" made no difference to him whatsoever.

              I would feel the same way, and I believe you would, too.  Being responsible for the death of anyone at all, much less an innocent, would be a terrible burden to bear.  Would there be anything we wouldn't do for that family to try to make amends?

              Yet we are all guilty of killing an innocent person.  Every one of us who has sinned even one sin—if that were possible—has murdered the Son of God.  Does it haunt you the way killing that child haunted our friend?  Would you do anything to make amends? 

              And the worst of it is this—for us it wasn't even an accident.  And in the words of the old hymn, every time we sin, we "crucify him once again."  If it made us feel as bad as it ought to, maybe we wouldn't have such a difficult time with temptation.  If we truly felt horrible about it, we might just be able to overcome.

              Something to think about this morning.
 
For as touching those who were once enlightened and tasted of the heavenly gift, and were made partakers of the Holy Spirit, and tasted the good word of God, and the powers of the age to come, and then fell away, it is impossible to renew them again unto repentance; seeing they crucify to themselves the Son of God afresh, and put him to an open shame. (Heb 6:4-6)
 
Dene Ward

We don’t travel a lot, but when we do we try to find a group of brethren who share our faith.  Most people call this looking for a “sound church.”  After several unsettling experiences with so-called “sound churches” on the road, I started studying the phrase.  Guess what?  You won’t find it anywhere in the Bible, not in any of the nine translations I checked.
 
             I have already mentioned a time when we forgot our “church clothes” and had to attend services in jeans and flannel shirts—camp clothes--and the cold reception we received.  Another time I was in a city far away from home for a scary surgery.  We remembered our church clothes, but it didn’t seem to make a bit of difference.  We walked in the front door, went down the middle aisle and sat two-thirds of the way down—Keith must be able to see faces in detail so he can lip-read.  We were at least 10 minutes early.  No one approached us, nor nodded, nor even looked our way.  Finally the woman in front of us heard Keith say, “I can’t believe no one has even greeted us,” and turned around to introduce herself.  After services we walked down the aisle surrounded shoulder to shoulder by the (still unwelcoming) crowd, stopped at a tract rack for a minute or two, and finally walked out the door before the preacher finally came out calling us to say hello.  It wasn’t like we didn’t give him plenty of time.  No one else even bothered.

              Contrast that to the time we entered a building thinking that we probably didn’t agree entirely with this group because of a few notices hanging on the wall, but were greeted effusively by every single member the minute they saw us.  We were even invited to lunch, while at the previous church I mentioned, living in a hotel between dangerous procedures, no one even asked if we needed any help.

              So when our recent study of faith came upon a passage in Titus about being “sound in the faith,” I decided to check the entire context and see what that actually meant.  Since I must be brief here, I hope you will get your Bible and work through it with me and see for yourself.

              First, the phrase applies to individuals, not a corporate body.  Titus 1:10-16 gives us a detailed and complete picture of someone who is not “sound.”  They are the ones the elders in verses 5-9 are supposed to “reprove sharply” so they may be “sound in the faith” v 13.  Look at those seven verses (10-16) and you will see a list that includes these, depending upon your version:  unruly, vain talkers, deceivers, false teachers, men defiled in mind and conscience, unbelievers (who obviously claim otherwise), those who are abominable, disobedient, and deny God by their works, being unfit for good works. 

              The context does not end just because the next line says, “Chapter 2.”  In that chapter Paul clearly defines what “sound in the faith” means, beginning unmistakably with “”Speak the things that befit sound doctrine, that the older men…” and going straight into the way people should live.  Read through it.  Everything he tells the older men and women, the younger men and women, and the servants to do and to be fit somewhere in that previous list (“un-sound”) as an opposite. 

              If people who are unruly are un-sound, then people who are temperate, sober-minded, and reverent in demeanor are sound.  If people who are defiled in mind and conscience are not sound, then people who are chaste, not enslaved to wine (or anything else), and not thieves are sound.  If people who deny God by their works and are even unfit for good works are not sound, then people who are kind, sound in love, and examples of good works are sound.  Go all the way through that second chapter and you can find a (opposite) match for everything in the first.

              Now let’s point out something important:  if being a false teacher makes you unsound, then being a teacher of good and having uncorrupt doctrine does indeed make you sound, but why do we act like that is all there is to it?  You can have a group of people who believe correctly right down the line but who are unkind, unloving, un-submissive, impatient, and who do nothing but sit on their pews on Sunday morning with no good works to their name and they are still not a “sound church!”  Not according to Paul. Nine out of the ten things on that “un-sound” list have nothing to do with doctrine—they are about the way each individual lives his life.

              I am reminded of Jesus’ scalding words to the Pharisees in Matthew 23:23:  Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you tithe mint and anise and cummin, and have left undone the weightier matters of the law, justice, and mercy, and faith: but these you ought to have done, and not to have left the other undone. Yes, our doctrine must be sound, but doesn’t it mean anything to us that Paul spends far more time talking about how we live our lives every day? 

              If the church is made up of people, then a sound church must be made up of sound people who live sound lives.  That is the weightier matter of the law of Christ.
 
For not the hearers of the law are just before God, but the doers of the law shall be justified: Romans 2:13.
 
Dene Ward

I opened the cooler and looked down into the plastic bin inside and saw a bloody mess.  Immediately my mind went into salvage mode.  We were camping, living out of a cooler for nine days, and couldn’t take any chances, even if it did cost us a week’s worth of meals.  As it turns out, the problem was easily solved.

              Whenever we camp, because space is short for that much food and eating out is not an option, I take all the meat for our evening meals frozen.  The meat itself acts as ice in the cooler, keeping the temperature well down in the safe zone, and we use it as it thaws, replacing it with real ice.  I learned early on to re-package each item in a zipper freezer bag so that as it thaws the juices don’t drip out and contaminate the other food and the ice we use in our drinks.  We also put the meat in plastic tubs, away from things like butter, eggs, and condiments—just in case.  That’s what saved us this time.

              Somehow the plastic bag in which I had placed the steaks had developed a leak, but all those bloody red juices were safely contained in the white tub, and the other meats were still sealed.  I removed the bin from the cooler, put the steaks in a new bag, dumped the mess and cleaned the bin and the outside of the other meat bags, then returned the whole thing to the cooler, everything once again tidy and above all, safe.

              We all do the same things in our kitchens.  After handling raw meat, we wash our hands.  We use separate cutting boards for meat and vegetables meant to be eaten fresh.  And lately, they are even telling us not to wash poultry at all because it splashes bacteria all over the kitchen.

              We follow all these safety rules, then think nothing of cross-contaminating our souls.  What do you watch on TV?  What do you look at on the internet?  Where do you go for recreation?  No, we cannot get out of the world, but we can certainly keep it from dumping its garbage on the same countertops we use to prepare our families’ spiritual meals.  There is an “off” button.

              Maybe the problem is that these things are not as repulsive to us as they should be.  The Psalmist said, I have not sat with men of falsehood; Neither will I go in with dissemblers. I hate the assembly of evil-doers, And will not sit with the wicked. I will wash my hands in innocency: So will I compass your altar, O Jehovah; Psalms 26:4-6.  Can we say our hands are clean when we assemble to worship God after spending a week being titillated by the sins of others?

              If we followed some basic spiritual safety rules as carefully as we do those for our physical health, maybe we would lose fewer to cross-contamination of the soul.
 
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather even reprove them; for the things which are done by them in secret it is a shame even to speak of. Ephesians 5:11-12
 
Dene Ward

The cliché is now true—my doctor is my social life.  When you start seeing the same issues of the same magazines in four different offices, you know it's so.  So the other day I actually found a new magazine to look at:  Country Living.  Let me look through this, I thought.  Maybe I am one of the few here who could appreciate it. 

              Boy, was I wrong.  In fact, the title of this magazine was wrong.  This was not country living it depicted.  It was some wealthy people who decided they wanted to get out of town and thought the peace and quiet would be wonderful, but only a few minutes a day of it.  I know them personally.  We have several within a mile of us.  One of their homes (well, it might as well have been one of the ones near us) was showcased in a ten page spread so you could copy their decorating schemes.  Notice these items:

              Plank floors in a 15 x 20 kitchen--(Are they planning to square dance in it?)

              A pedestal sink in the "powder room"--(A powder room?  A mud room out in the country, maybe, but forget powdering your nose if you're going out to the garden in June or July here in Florida.) 

              Cabinet hardware at $25 each piece--(A $25 cabinet knob?  I mean, really, all you do is pull the thing, and sometimes you still have some of that garden mud on your hands when you do.)

              $35 each throw pillows in an all-white room--(An all-white room in the country?  Where there are no sidewalks and you have to walk through the mud to get to the steps?)

              $1400 each wicker chairs on the front porch--(I couldn't relax just walking ten feet away from a $1400 chair, much less sitting in it.  And no one in their right mind would shell peas or shuck corn in it. So what's it good for?)
No, this is not country living.  It is mere pretense.  In fact, our experience has been that these are the folks who pack up and head back into town (a 50-60 mile round trip) 5 or 6 days a week to go shopping, play a round of golf or a set of tennis, have lunch with the girls, or get a manicure.  The only thing they do in the country is sleep.  Try inviting them over to help with hog-slaughtering day in return for some of the meat and watch them melt into a pale puddle of angst.

              But—take a look around you on Sunday morning and you will find that this magazine isn’t the only place for pretenders.  Some people go to church because you are "supposed to."  That's what good, moral people do.  I grew up around a lot of folks like that.  Some choose a place out of convenience, not because they believe what it teaches.  Others go because their parents raised them that way, not out of any real conviction.  Some go for the benefits—people come see you when you're sick, someone will always help out if you have a need, and there is always a preacher handy for weddings and funerals.

              So let's think about it this morning.  Why am I where I am on Sunday mornings?  If I can't come up with an answer beyond the ones above, I just might have a problem.  I might be no more a Christian than those folks I know who are not "country people," no matter where their home happens to be located.  God expects a commitment—one of the heart, one of faith, one of understanding what you believe and why and being willing to stand up for it. 
God expects Christians who really are.
 
“As for you, son of man, your people who talk together about you by the walls and at the doors of the houses, say to one another, each to his brother, ‘Come, and hear what the word is that comes from the LORD.’ And they come to you as people come, and they sit before you as my people, and they hear what you say but they will not do it; for with lustful talk in their mouths they act; their heart is set on their gain. And behold, you are to them like one who sings lustful songs with a beautiful voice and plays well on an instrument, for they hear what you say, but they will not do it. (Ezek 33:30-32)
 
Dene Ward

I’ve heard it all my life:  you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.  Imagine my surprise to find out you can catch quite a few flies with vinegar after all. 

              I read it in a cooking magazine.  Most gnats are fruitflies.  If you are having trouble with gnats in your kitchen, fill a small dish with vinegar, squeeze a drop of two of dishwashing liquid on it and set it out where you have the most gnats.  What interests a fruitfly is the vinegars formed in the rotten fruit, and that bowl of vinegar spells “rotten fruit” to their little sensory receptors.  Because of the surface tension on water, a fruitfly can land and not sink, but that drop of dishwashing liquid breaks the tension.  They land and sink, drowning immediately.

              I put one of these dishes out one day and an hour later found 18 little black specks lying on the bottom, never to buzz in my house again.  Now, every summer, I have two or three custard cups of apple cider vinegar lying around my house, and far fewer gnats than ever before.

              One of the cups sits on the window sill next to the chair that overlooks the bird feeder.  That bird feeder attracts more than its fair share of gnats in the summer too, and I have a suspicion that most of the gnats in the house sneak through the cracks around that window.  The screen is gone so I can see the birds better and the double window is up a foot so I have a place for my coffee cup on the sill.  That lack of triple protection means they can get in easier than anywhere else in the house except an open door.

              So the other afternoon I sat down to rest a bit after canning a bushel of tomatoes.  Keith was emptying the residual garbage pails of skins and seeds, and dumping the heavy pots of boiling water outside so the house wouldn’t heat up yet more from the steam.  I had just replaced the vinegar in the dish a few minutes before. 

              A gnat suddenly buzzed my face and I shooed it away.  He came back, but this time he headed straight for the window.  “Aha!” I thought.  If I just sat still I could see how it actually happened.  It was a real life lesson.

              He had gotten “wind” of the vinegar somehow and flew over to check it out at a prudent distance of eight or ten inches, which is several thousand times the body length of a gnat I imagine, and was certainly safe.  He flew away, but within a few seconds he was back.  This time he flew a little closer, maybe half the distance he had before.

              That happened several times with the gnat coming in closer and closer on each pass.  Finally, he landed on the window sill a couple of inches from the custard cup.  I could just imagine him sitting there tensed up and waiting for something to happen, then finally relaxing as he discovered that whatever danger he had imagined wasn’t there. 

              He flew again, but not away.  This time he hovered over the cup, doing figure eights two or three inches above the surface of the vinegar.  Then he landed on the lip of the custard cup.  At that point I imagine the fumes from the fresh vinegar were nearly intoxicating.  All that rotten fruit right down there for the taking, and besides, he had never had trouble before landing on a piece of bruised, decaying fruit, and this one was obviously an apple, one of the best.

              So he flew yet again, circling closer and closer to the surface.  “Now,” he must have thought as he landed on what he was sure was a solid chunk of overripe Macintosh, or Jonathan, or Red Rome, and promptly sank into the vinegar.  He didn’t even wiggle—it was over that fast, his drowning in what he thought was safe, in a place where nothing bad had ever happened to him before. 

              It works this way for humans too, you know.  What are you hovering over today?
 
Look not thou upon the wine when it is red, When it sparkles in the cup, When it goes down smoothly: At the last it bites like a serpent, And stings like an adder. Proverbs 23:31-32.

Thorns and snares are in the way of the perverse: He who keeps his soul shall be far from them, Proverbs 22:5.
 
Dene Ward
 

My sisters and I have been studying the prophets of the Old Testament, and I mean all of them.  Not every prophet was a literary prophet—meaning he had a book named after him.  Many people the Bible calls a prophet we seem to have totally missed.  One of our first tasks was to list them all and I am sure the first one will surprise you:

              Then God said to him in the dream, “Yes, I know that you have done this in the integrity of your heart, and it was I who kept you from sinning against me. Therefore I did not let you touch her.  Now then, return the man's wife, for he is a prophet, so that he will pray for you, and you shall live. But if you do not return her, know that you shall surely die, you and all who are yours.” Gen20: 6,7.  When God himself calls Abraham a prophet you cannot argue with it.

              You have probably noticed several posts from the prophets in the past three years, all of which came from the class.  I imagine there will be many more.  When you reach my age and you have been "going to church" your whole life, you doubt there is all that much more to learn.  Then you study the prophets and the amount you didn't know is staggering—and humbling.  The thing is, I have studied a few of these men before, but I still learned more in the past three years than I have in the past twenty. 

              It helps to have a knowledgeable husband, but even if you do not, grab those Bibles and get with it now.  It will take me years more to finish what I have only scratched the surface of.  In fact, we might start the whole thing over from the top, but really, as we approach the last chapter of Malachi, we need a break.  The prophets can be a little depressing, especially when you see that we have the same tendencies as the faithless people they preached to.

             Zechariah, however, gave us a few moments of comfort.  While it, too, has its share of gloomy predictions, the night visions were particularly encouraging.  Those visions came to the returning exiles who found life harder than they had expected.  The Persian king may have been "on their side," but that did not clear away the rubble; it did not make the crops grow; it did not make the people they had to run out of Jerusalem like them any better.  Nearly a hundred years later, they still suffered, building the city walls with half the men working and the other half standing guard.  Later on, Nehemiah thwarted several attempts on his life.  But in Haggai and Zechariah's time, when the Temple was finally rebuilt twenty years after the first group returned, it was a pale shadow of that first gold-covered masterpiece of architecture. So God sent Zechariah 8 visions, evidently all on the same night, visions of comfort and encouragement.

                We, too, live in a pagan world that stands against everything we believe.  Some of us are mocked at work, at school, in our neighborhoods because we do not follow the crowd in our lifestyle, dress, and speech.  When we look at some of our tiny, struggling congregations, we wonder how this can really be the promised, glorious kingdom.  We try to reach the lost and though some come to see, it seems most turn around and leave because it does not match their vision either.  And so we, too, wonder sometimes if God is even aware of us, if He understands our disappointments and frustrations.

              We need the same encouragement those people did so long ago—every generation needs it--so here goes a brand new series, "Zechariah's Night Visions."  Due to my continuing history series, I cannot promise you will see them all on the same day, such as every Monday, so you will have to be a little more diligent about checking every week.  But I do promise that while these may sometimes be challenging, the encouragement they give will more than make up for that.  And you will more than likely learn a few new things.  Not too many churches pick up the book of Zechariah and study it.
 
For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope. (Rom 15:4)
 
Dene Ward

Nothing aggravates me much more than listening to someone claim to be religious, claim to love the Lord, claim to have the utmost faith in Him, and then live like the Devil.  It is false advertising at its worst.  Then our women’s Bible study reached James 2 in our study of faith and suddenly, it got a little personal.
 
             Although I am grateful for the convenience of chapters and verses that the scholars have added, it is obvious that they sometimes had their minds on other things when they threw them in.  And throw them it appears they did, like sprinkling salt on a plateful of food.  So what if a verse is divided in the middle of a sentence or a chapter in the middle of a thought?  The “what” is this—you forget to check the entire context because your eyes tell your mind that it started and ended right there, not on the page before or after.

              So we backed up into chapter 1 and found this:  “If anyone thinks he is religious…” in verse 26.  Another two verses back we found, “If anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer…” verse 23, which directly connects to the whole point of chapter 2: “Faith without works is dead.”  Chapter 2 itself begins with, “Show no partiality as you hold the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ.”  So from all that we easily concluded that being a doer of the Word (1:23), being religious (1:26), and holding to the faith (2:1) were all synonymous, and that it was easy to tell if a person fit the bill. 

              Follow along with me.  A person who merely thinks he is religious but in reality is not:  does not bridle his tongue, 1:26; does not serve others, 1:27; lives a life of impurity, 1:27;  does not love his neighbor as himself, 2:8;  shows partiality, 2:9;  does not show mercy, 2:13.

              I am happy to point out that those celebrities who claim faith in the Lord hop from bed to bed, and carouse at every opportunity.  Their language is foul and a criminal record of drugs, DUIs, and assaults follow them around like a noxious vapor trail. 

              But how about the rest of us, the ones who don’t have the paparazzi following us?  Do we serve those in need or are we too busy?  Do we love our neighbors, or only the friends we enjoy being with?  Do we talk about “them,” whoever they might be in any conversation, as if they were somehow “other” than us because of their race, their nationality, their lifestyle, their politics, even the clothes they wear?  If I do any of that am I any more “religious” than the Jesus-calling, promiscuous drunk I abhor?

              This discussion also led us to another defining characteristic of a true faith.  Look at those qualities again—someone who says the right thing at the right time, whose words are extremely important; someone who serves others; someone who is pure and holy; someone who loves as himself; someone who treats everyone the same, even the lowest of the low; someone who shows mercy—who does that best describe?  Isn’t it the one we are supposed to have faith in, Jesus, and ultimately God?

              Adoration equals imitation.  If I am not trying to become like the one I have faith in, my faith is a sham.  How can I claim to believe in a God who sends rain on the just and the unjust while holding back on my service to one I have deemed unworthy of it?  How can I have faith in a merciful God and not forgive even the worst sin against me?  How can I have faith in a God who is holy and pure and a Lord who remained sinless as the perfect example to me and make excuses for my own sins?

              Do you think you are religious?  Do your neighbors?  Sometimes what we really are is a whole lot clearer to everyone else.
 
But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing. James 1:22-25
 
Dene Ward

For twenty-two years on this rural five acres we didn’t have a carport.  For over two decades our vehicles were at the mercy of sub-tropical sun, thunder and lightning, hail, hurricanes, and even once an inch of snow.  Not a single time were the cars or trucks we owned damaged during that time.

              Eight years ago we had a slab poured and a carport erected.  “Whew!” we sighed with relief.  “Now we’re safe.”

              The next summer we were expecting guests and since the forecast called for a few showers, we moved the car out so the children would have a dry place to play.  Everyone left and we went inside to clean up.  When we came back outside to move the car back into the carport, a tree limb had fallen and put a dent in the trunk—a big one, and knocked off a half dollar size chunk of paint too.  All those years we were concerned and careful, nothing happened.  As soon as we thought we were safe, we weren’t.

              One who is wise is cautious and turns away from evil, but a fool is reckless and careless, Proverbs 14:16.  How careful are you out there in the world?  Do you heed the warnings about evil companions corrupting good morals, and the Devil as a roaring lion hunting his prey (1 Cor 15:53; 1 Pet 5:9)?  Or are you so confident in your own righteousness that you are careless, moving away from the safety of the “carport?”

              How many times has a parent sent his child out with all the usual cautions only to have that child sigh and roll his eyes and say something like, “Yes, yes, I know,” shaking his head as he goes out the door?  I don’t care how well your life has gone until now, how safe and smart you think you are, one bad decision can ruin everything for a lifetime.  Keep it under the carport!

              How many times has a happily married man, supremely confident of his self-control, seen someone attractive, flirted a little “just for fun,” and wound up doing exactly what he never thought he ever would?  No matter how strong you think you are, don’t dally with the Devil—keep it under the carport!

              How many times has a Christian stepped over the line “just this once,” “to see what I’m missing,” or “so I know what I’m up against,” meaning to return immediately to the fold, but never making that return trip because that little fling cost him his life?  Life isn’t certain—keep it under the carport!

              You think I’m crazy don’t you, just because a limb fell on my car.  The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice, Prov 12:15.

             And if coming from me isn’t good enough—and really, why should it be?—then how about God?  By the fear of the Lord one turns away from evil, Prov 16:6.  My flesh trembles for fear of you, and I am afraid of your judgments, Psa 119:120.  Job said if he had done anything wrong, then let my shoulder blade fall from my shoulder, and let my arm be broken from its socket. For I was in terror of calamity from God, and I could not have faced his majesty. 31:22-23. If no one else can do it, then let God put the fear in you—keep it under the carport!

              We wear seat belts every time because we never know when we will have an accident.  We get our inoculations because we never know when we might be exposed to a disease.  We have smoke alarms in our homes because we never know when a fire might break out.  We do all these things because it’s common sense.  So are the things God’s Word tells us about how to stay out of the clutches of sin and the Devil. 

              You’d better believe that from now on, my car will stay under the carport!  How about your soul?
 
For you yourselves are fully aware that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night. While people are saying, "There is peace and security," then sudden destruction will come upon them as labor pains come upon a pregnant woman, and they will not escape. 1 Thessalonians 5:2-3
 
Dene Ward

When I was fifteen, the teenage Bible class met upstairs in the building where the church assembled.  The stairs were steep and narrow.  After you become accustomed to something, you become careless, and one Sunday morning after the bell rang and the halls below were filled with talking and laughter, I headed down those stairs and stepped just a little too far.  The front of my foot bent forward at an anatomically impossible angle, and my downward plunge didn’t stop till I hit the bottom.

              Do you know what I did?  Even though my foot started to swell like a balloon on a helium tank, even though the doctor shook his head and told me it was the worst sprain he had ever seen, even though that foot bothered me for six months and the ankle always twisted at the least bit of uneven ground for the next twenty years—despite the gravity of the injury and the pain, the first thing I did was push my skirt down.  When I landed at the bottom of the staircase, it was up around my waist.  That lasted approximately 0.2 seconds.  Whoosh!  It was down and back to my knees once again.  Then, and only then, did I moan.

              Modesty was second nature to me because I was taught it as a child.  I have a friend who wouldn’t give the ER doctor her shirt, despite the fact that she was having a heart attack at that moment.  That’s the way we were raised.  That’s the way most people raised their daughters.  I’m not so sure they do any longer.

              This is something that most women do not want to hear.  They do not want to believe what I am going to tell you about good men.  They want to think that this only applies to bad men, to immature men, to worldly men, but it doesn’t.  It applies to them all because they are men.

              God made men differently than he made women.  He put something in them that makes them think and behave differently.  It’s a hormone, ladies, just like the hormones you want to use to excuse your less than stellar behavior at certain times of life, only it’s a male hormone. 

              Testosterone is what makes a man a man.  It makes him aggressive and protective.  That is why he romances you.  That is why he wants to provide for you and take care of you and the children you have together.  Good things, right?  It also makes him more easily aroused sexually.  He is not a “dirty old man” when he feels that way.  He is, quite simply, a man.  If he has to put up with your moods, you must put up with the side effects of his hormones too.  And just like you expect him to be understanding, he has the right to expect the same from you—without ridicule and without complaint. 

              Far more important than that, God expects it of you.  You must not do anything that could cause a man to sin (stumble, offend), and that leads us to the clothing we wear.  Granted, we are talking about good men, men who practice self-control.  Some men can lust after a woman who is covered head to toe in a horse blanket.  You can’t do anything about them and God doesn’t hold you responsible for that.  But when I hear a Christian college girl say to a young man, “I can wear my bikini if I want to--deal with it!” I know someone needs an attitude adjustment.

              Look at Romans 14 and, instead of thinking about the idolatry problem, think about the clothes you wear. Why do you pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God; for it is written, "As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God." So then each of us will give an account of himself to God. Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother, vv 10-13.  When we don’t care how our actions affect our brothers, we are despising them, Paul says, judging them, and we will have to answer to God for that.   

              Now look at verse 15, with just one slight word change:  For if your brother is grieved by what you [wear], you are no longer walking in love. By what you [wear], do not destroy the one for whom Christ died.  Are you willing to meet God having destroyed a brother by your insistence that you can do as you like and he should “Deal with it?”

              Every Man’s Battle is a book that every woman should read.  As I said, you won’t like it.  You won’t like thinking about the fact that the man you love is like that, but refusing to deal with the issue won’t change it.  Once you understand what your man is dealing with, you will be able to help him through it.

              And here is something else just as important:  Teach your girls about it!  Do you want to keep them safe in a world of predators?  Teach them how to avoid the traps.  How they act and what they wear can make a huge difference.  And listen to their fathers.  If he says, “She doesn’t leave the house in that outfit,” pay attention to him!  He knows better than you what could happen if she does.

              The fashion world knows exactly what it is doing when it creates the clothes women wear.  Unlike the women in the church who want to stick their heads in the sand, worldly women can tell you in an instant what a woman’s clothes do to a man. 

              This is a serious matter.  It’s about the destiny of souls, and God holding us responsible for them.
             
But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea. Woe to the world for temptations to sin! For it is necessary that temptations come, but woe to the one by whom the temptation comes! Matthew 18:6-7
 
Dene Ward

I have a friend who, before she retired, kept a bar of soap in her desk drawer.  Whenever a new young hire came in, it wasn't long before she was telling him about her soap and how much he needed to chew on it awhile.  If you have not noticed, the language around us is simply atrocious. 

               "It's just a word," one young co-worker proclaimed.

               "Choose another one," she tersely replied.

           Why anyone would think that filthy language was appropriate in a professional setting, I cannot imagine.  But then I go out in the world and hear children saying words I would never have breathed aloud when I was young—not if I wanted to sit down again any time soon.

            I am not just talking about the four letter words that people usually consider "dirty" or even taking the Lord's name in vain.  As a culture we have become crude and vulgar.  Lucy and Ethel had us rolling in the floor as we watched their antics on the candy wrapping conveyor belt and in the wine vat.  Now we seem to require a heavy dose of bathroom humor or sexual innuendo before anything is deemed funny. 

            And talk about hypocrisy—the same media that berates the president for his bad language gives us a show called "S*****'s Creek" and a movie called "Meet the F*****s" with all the attendant jokes that can obviously be made from those two titles.  I won't dignify them with their supposedly cleaned up names.

           Do you think it hasn't affected Christians?  I hear words that I would never have been allowed to say without being punished all the time.  No, they aren't "dirty" words.  They're just crude.  Swear words aren't the only words Christians shouldn't be speaking.  I regularly delete posts on Facebook from my brothers and sisters that a Christian shouldn't have spoken aloud to a few, much less put out there for literally thousands to see. 

          Our culture has even managed to make it acceptable to use one of the ugliest phrases in our language, a phrase that would have ended up in a parking lot beat down when I was a child.  And the younger generation steadfastly refuses to accept its origin just because they can find no one who knows it either.  My poor husband wound up vilified once because he dared suggest that a brother shouldn't use that term, which refers to a homosexual act.  Even if the younger generation refuses to recognize the vulgarity for what it is, we older folks know exactly what it means and "everyone says it" never has been and never will be an acceptable excuse. 

             Is it really that important?  Paul says it is.

           And there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks. (Eph 5:4)  That term "coarse jesting" is actually one word in the Greek and it isn't necessarily talking about dirty jokes.  It's talking about crudity, vulgarity, double entendres, and any other sort of coarse language.  It refers to bathroom humor, bodily functions, sexual innuendo and anything that should be unacceptable in polite society, and even more so among those who claim lives of purity.  Look at the rest of the context.

             But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints; and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks. For this you know with certainty, that no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. (Eph 5:3-5).

            Do you see the implications Paul makes?  If I speak like this, I am impure, immoral, and not fit to be in the kingdom.  That's how important this is.  We are supposed to be different.  How will it be known if we sound just like everyone else, and laugh at the same crude humor?  Remember the old Ivory Soap ads?  "99 and 44/100th percent pure," they claimed.  We should be trying for a purity even beyond that, but we end up looking like someone dropped us in a tar pit when we open our mouths.

             I am not some ignorant fool who does not realize that Paul spoke from time to time in figures that were shocking.  I would that they that unsettle you would even go beyond circumcision, (Gal 5:12) is a prime example.  But let me ask you this.  How much shock value would that statement have had if he spoke that way all the time?  This was a special circumstance.  People were losing their souls.  When this was read, I imagine there was a collective gasp as everyone suddenly understood how serious Paul was about the matter.  He would never had said such a thing otherwise.

            Us?  We sound like that constantly, just for laughs, or even about the trivial everyday stuff.  I feel like my friend—I need to carry a bar of soap around.  But I never imagined I would have to offer it to a brother.
 
Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. (Eph 4:29)
 
Dene Ward